"he's in trouble now because of us"
No...he is in trouble because of HIS actions.
I'm an honest, upfront person, so don't be offended:
You helped him already with a lawyer at the beginning.
Look, I am not a parent. But I was once a minor. It's a parents job to make rules and enforce them. And if the kid can't live by the rules, punish them.
Your kid is already in the court system. He needs to learn there are consequences for his actions.
As a parent - you can get him into counseling, anger management, AA...
You can take away the Playstation, Ipod... Reward behavior, punish misbehavior.
I'm not offended at all. And I don't disagree.
What I meant was, he's in trouble now because we picked up a phone and dialed his PO's number to report his behavior. He will be accountable for his actions.
Good for you!
I do wish you luck and hope getting into bigger trouble will make him change his life around, he can still do it if he wants to.
yes, there are people that ask, "How can you turn in your own child?" The answer is simple... if you tell a child that actions have results and then say, "but not this time" to a big one, the lesson is worth a curse in a hurricane.
At the moment it's still 'our fault' but we're working on that.
but...if we were going to have to turn him in for something, well, I prefer this 'event' to something bigger...perhaps now he'll realize we were serious.
Back to the legal question about whether he is required to have representation before the hearing goes ahead, I think that I'm going to have to call the court house to find out what the answer is for my son's specific case...any ideas on who (what job position) I should ask to speak to that would have the answer to this?
(I've called this court house before and been shuffled around and around from person to person....)
Thanks, Unca Jeffy.
I hated to sound harsh, but like to be honest.
Shase....While it may be hard to make your son pay the price now...you're doing the right thing.
Here is what you do....
You tell the child that you will start selling everything of value that he has.
Take them to the pawn shop... start with the good stuff... the ipod, the cellphone, the computer, the xbox... whatever hurts most.
Put the money in a legal fund. You have an idea of what an attorney costs an hour... plan on four hours.
That's exactly what my family would have done. Everything would have been packed up while I watched, and taken away.