My partner and I have been in a same-sex committed relationship for over nine years. He is a US citizen and I am from Ireland. For the first seven years of this, we lived together in Ireland. However, due to a number of factors (including visa issues, death in his family), he moved back to the US two years ago. For the first year that he was back, we used vacation time to see each other on a semi-regular basis (we saw each other for 1-2 weeks every 2 months). During this time, he got a job that he loved and we both decided that our long term aim would be to live in the US together. I started looking for employment there with the hope of being sponsored for a visa, but the specific field I work in doesn't exactly have an over-abundance of jobs in the area we wish to live. In the meantime, I was offered a dream job in Ireland that basically allows me take large chunks of time off between projects. We decided that this would be perfect for me as I could live and work in Ireland doing project work and during the quiet times between projects I could go on vacation to the US on a Visa Waiver. I would be spending 6-8 weeks in Ireland at a time and 3-4 weeks in the US, depending on what projects I was working on. It was also on the understanding from the company in Ireland that I would be available to fly back to Ireland at short notice if I was needed for work.
This arrangement worked for a while, until I started getting questioned more and more at US Immigration. I asked if there was anything else I could do and was told by one immigration official that I should contact the embassy to see what options were open to me. I contacted the embassy and ended up getting a Tourist/Business Visa, which doesn't seem to have made any difference - the last time I travelled with this visa, I was again held at immigration for questioning.
Although I get questioned each time, I have never been refused entry. However, I live in fear that I will be refused entry during a future visit. I have always been 100% open and honest about the purpose of my visits, and because I never stay for anything near the allowed amount of time that my visa or visa waiver allowed, I was under the impression that there should be no problems.
Are there any other options open to me to put myself in a situation where I should not be denied entry? I am not seeking to work in the US - merely to be allowed multiple visits without the fear of being refused entry. From what I can see, there are no other visa options open to me (except for the diversity visa lottery which I have applied for every year for the past 9 years), but I was wondering if there was anything else I have missed. Is this potentially something that would fall under the Green Card Private Bill remit? What would the chances of success be here?

