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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Posts
    3

    Default Suffering from Harassment by Ex - I'm Tempted to Notify His Employer

    Hello all, (NY)

    I've been divorced over 7 years and my ex husband who was condescendingly abusive to me and my family throughout the marriage continues to pummel, harass and bully me by email. Our NY court order states we are to have written communication only (this was at my request) - no more phone or in-person contact. At least no more physical threats but he continues with the put-down insults and demeaning emails that spillover to how the kids view me. He always pushes the limit and recently had the nerve to go right up to my front door to tauntingly say "hello" while dropping kids off which is in direct contrast to the past drop-offs which were always curbside.

    Enough is enough to the point I'm afraid to open his emails anymore because he first piles on the nasty words, then tell me he needs my parental consent/approval questions for something but not til he's done attacking me below the belt. Now I want to contact his employer and cc them in on the emails he sends me from his work email address. Yes, it may sound like a conflict of strategy but he's one of these wall street a**holes who made lots of money, and waved it in everyone's face with a company encouraging this narcissistic ego behavior. Really sick and tired of years of him degrading and ridiculing me by email and demanding what I've made of myself in recent years because I "have nothing to show for it." And then he puncutates his abuse by demanding I get myself psychological help. What should I do? I can only ignore "so much" and take so much personal distress and his constant antics and intimidation have all been detrimental to my well-being, depression and poor self-esteem.

    BTW I was also recently affected by the recession and my job was cut so I was unemployed for awhile but just received an offer - thank goodness this cheered me up - although for much lesser pay! But my ex always took the opportunity to ridicule me for that too by loudly stating I should be making over $100K by now and that it's time to pay up for college costs coming up. Truth is: I was a stay at home mom for 7 years and had to piece together a career after the divorce.

    I have a small circle of trustworthy friends who are supportive of me but it's not enough to combat his escalating behavior. My tact is to respond only to the decision making needs. I don't bother engaging in word wars with him he clearly wants to provoke in me. He also orders me not to talk to the school or other parents about issues related to one of the kids. So I want to know if I have a right to complain to his employer for this abusive behavior and if there's a right way to do this. To anyone reading this, it will not seem severe enough in scale to pursue contempt/violation in court but collectively I feel I'm on the verge of some sort of restraining or protective order.

    Many TIA!!

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