Wanted to add some more...
my ex-husband also keeps saying he is planning to move to another state (over 5 hours away) in about 5 months (his home state). If I agreed to joint custody and he moved would I be able to take him back to court to have it changed to me having custody so I'd be able to get child support? If the judge knows he is planning to leave VA would he be less likely to grant joint custody?
I should mention he already has a child in the other state that he doesn't have custody of and sees maybe 2 times a year, so I don't have high hopes that he will see our child often either.

