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  1. #1
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    Oct 2009
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    Default Giving Up Rights to an Unborn Child and Financial Obligations

    I am comon law married to a woman in TX.
    We have not lived together since Feb.
    I now currently reside in NJ, planning to leave country for work.
    She lives in Oklahoma. I am not sure the child is mine. she has had multiple partners and has been prostituting herself out for money. she sent me an email stating that is i give up all rights to this child, I shall not be required to pay child support or have any financial obligation to them what so ever.
    Is this true??? If i give up all rights(providing the child is mine) am I free from child support or any other financial obligations?

    I would also like to know what i need to do to get divorced.
    I was told by a lwayer here in NJ that I need to be a resident for a year before I can file. I am leaving to go over seas for employment and shall not return for a minimum of a year. How would I go about this?

    Regards
    Brian

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    Toledo, OH
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    Default Re: Giving Up Rights to an Unborn Child and Financial Obligations

    If the child is yours, no, you may not simply surrender your parental rights and be free of support obligations. The law holds that children are entitled to support from BOTH parents.

    She may choose not to pursue support, but the court is not going to let you surrender your rights.

    As for your divorce, if you do not yet meet the NJ residency requirements, file in TX.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
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    13

    Default Re: Giving Up Rights to an Unborn Child and Financial Obligations

    Understood, thank you.

    If the child turns out to be mine. What would i need to gain custody?
    I have emails, instant messenger conversations and craigslist adds she has and has replied to where she is asking for donations and even money for sexual favors and such

    She has also been a web cam girl

    I have people that have contacted me with naked pictures of her and chats/IM's of her preforming on the web cam.

    In the three years we were together she had her children less than half the time as well.

    I have a counselor that will also testify and has stated that I should have him brought into court if this does become a custody battle.

    I also have her criminal records given to me by her father. She shows a record of violence and harrassment after each long relationship, under her prior three last names, and several charges that I have brought against her.
    The detective in TX stated that she will be arrested, she signed the charges admitting to some but not all.

  4. #4
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    Jan 2008
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    Toledo, OH
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    Default Re: Giving Up Rights to an Unborn Child and Financial Obligations

    If the child turns out to be mine. What would i need to gain custody?
    You hire an attorney and you file for it. With your attorney's help, you demonstrate that it would be in the child's best interests to be with you.

    That she is a sex worker is not going to come into play much, unless the child is being exposed to sex acts. Lots of strippers and hookers and cam girls and phone girls retain full custody of their children - in particular if the kids are at Grammy's or in daycare while Mom is working.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
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    13

    Default Re: Giving Up Rights to an Unborn Child and Financial Obligations

    even though child services have been called and showed up over three times each for both her and her mother?

    What kind of evidence would i need to gain custody? Is this a losing battle?

  6. #6
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    Default Re: Giving Up Rights to an Unborn Child and Financial Obligations

    That CPS merely showed up is irrelevant. If someone calls CPS with a complaint, CPS is required by law to show up and investigate, even if they think the complaint is false.

    What matters is the outcome of these visits. What were CPS's findings at these visits? Were they found to be abusing or neglecting the kids? Unsafe living conditions? Inadequate food or clothing?

    It's not a losing proposition, you just need to do better than "She's a whore and had CPS out." That's why you get an attorney to handle things.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    38,867

    Default Re: Giving Up Rights to an Unborn Child and Financial Obligations

    the simple fact you are going overseas to work puts a real hitch in your endeavor to gain custody. Without knowing where you are going, your station alone could be cause for you to be denied custody. Then, with you being overseas, your chances of custody are again whittled, if possible at all.


    This is really a great display of love for your possible child though. First you want to disown the child and throw all sorts of allegations out there to make your wife look bad then when you are told you cannot simply disown the child, you shoot straight to custody.

    Why don't you simply have paternity established (at least regarding you) and if it is yours, just pay your child support (whether is be legally mandated or not, it is still your child and it is still your duty to support it) and leave it at that.

    It is obvious there was no desire to know the child until you were told you may still have to pay support.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
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    13

    Default Re: Giving Up Rights to an Unborn Child and Financial Obligations

    Wow...You are completely incorrect. You are to be giving leagal guidance not your assumptions.

    Number one...yes the children where taken away from her in the past. I do not know the exact reasons of why.

    as for being father of this child. I was informed that she had become pregnant 7 days prior to our divorce being finalized.

    As for calling her a whore...duh...WTF! you sell your ass for money instead of getting a job...your a whore!!!!!!!! She has not even had the 2 existing children, from 2 different fathers, in over a year. So...why not get a job, instead of preforming one.

    As for children...I have always wanted them, just not with a woman who WHOREs herself out for money, drinks alcohol and smokes like a chimmeny, not to mention other possible drugs she has been doing and the complete neglagance of diet....one fast food meal a day is not healthy for anyone, especially a pregnant woman.

    so maybe you should asnswer the questions in a legal manner, not throw your BS man hating accusations around.

    I am actually interested in the benifit of the child...if it is even mine.

    Oh yeah...how did she get pregnant...lmao...ever hear of date rape drugs...yes. Part of the reason she is getting arrrested as well as identity theft, assult and harrassment.

    So i would appreciate it if you would kindly know all the situation before you start your man hating with me.

    Yes i do know where I'm going to work. I work for a global company. It's just none of your business. Wow...I'm asking for legal advice, not your right wing accusation making.
    Stick to the facts please

  9. #9
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    Toledo, OH
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    Default Re: Giving Up Rights to an Unborn Child and Financial Obligations

    Uh, you need to calm yourself down if you're going to be asking for advice in a public forum. One of the perils of asking for advice from total strangers is that you're not always going to hear what you like. If you've got a thick skin suit, I would suggest you zip into it, because everyone here is a volunteer, and no one is required to be "professional" or even halfway nice. If you want answers only in a tone that suits you, it's up to you to go pay for that kind of help.

    You're still not doing a very good job of showing why you should be granted sole custody. Maybe it's because you're pissed at JK (who is a man, BTW), maybe you're just not very articulate, or maybe you're not really in possession of all of the facts that you need. Whatever the case, you've got to have something solid to take to the judge.

    -- Listing her profession as whore is not enough. It isn't illegal for a prostitute to have children.
    -- The mere fact of CPS visiting is not enough.
    -- That she uses Grammy as a long term caregiver is not enough.
    -- It's not illegal to smoke once you're 18. Even if you're pregnant.
    -- It's not illegal to drink once you're 21. Even if you're pregnant.
    -- It's not illegal at any age to feed yourself crappy food. Even if you're pregnant.
    -- It's not illegal to have children by multiple fathers.

    You might get somewhere with the fact that the other children have been taken away, maybe even reasonably argue that in light of that fact, you fear for your child's well-being, but you really need to know the circumstances surrounding their removal.

    JK is not wrong when he says that the fact of your going overseas to work could work against you. Chiefly, this is because it would interfere with the mother's rights - like it or not, even if you obtain sole legal and physical custody, she's still entitled to parenting time (visitation).

    Again, this is why you would need a lawyer to help you sort things out. A qualified attorney can approach the situation from several angles and advise you based on the information you give him/her.

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
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    13

    Default Re: Giving Up Rights to an Unborn Child and Financial Obligations

    Grammy has been diagnosed as bi-polar. I believe her daughter is as well.
    the grandmothers children have been taken away for three years, then returned.
    and then taken away again for neglect and mental abuse. the youngest is 17 and has returned.

    As for the pregnant one...her children where taken away due to the fact she lived in an abusive environment. her husband beat her and both of thier children. she also beat the children. There is evidence of this i obtained through legal records as well as proven drug abuse, multiple restraining orders and acts of violence. She was able to get her children back, but they have been relocated by CPS to other family members houses on multiple occasions due to the fact of unclean living situations from what I have been told. I am waiting for proof of this to be sent to me.

    As for my employment..I have the luxury of working any where. If I am able to get custody but must allow her visitaion, I will be foreced remain here in the states. It is close to my family, who would be a great help but, i would prefer to live elsewhere.

    since she is going to be arrested, and will be serving a minimum sentence of three years, according to the detective and the DA, will this allow/grant me sole custody? Would I be able to take the child and leave the counrty?

    Sorry i seem thin skinned. This matter truely bothers me and is also very emotional for me...if it is my child

    I am asking these questions because she has emailed me stating that she is going to get an abortion even though she is more than 6 months pregnant and in the same breathe basically demanded that i surrender all rights to this child. I shall then have to pay no child support or ever have contact with her again if i do so.

    Once again, i highly doubt this is my child. She is also refusing to take a DNA test. So I must wait until the child is born, and ask the court to order one.

    I am trying to prepare for the worst.
    As for the information I have with her "work"...I was thinking it would influence the court of her lack of morals and character. Not to mention that her children have been away for over a year and she has used the child support she recives to susstain herself, not the children.

    oh one more question...does it become a Federal crime since she found out she was going to get arrested in TX (didn't report to them as they asked) and in fact took off and ran to Oklahoma? Will this help me in any way, or just slow down the process of her being arrested?

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