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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Posts
    6

    Default Abusing Husband Threatening Not to File the Petition

    Hi,
    I am a French citizen, arrived in the US in January 09 on a visa waiver program. My American boyfriend then asked me to marry him and we got married in March, before my visa expired, so we would not have to be apart.
    Since that, my husband still has not done the papers to ajust my status and threatens me not to sign them if I do not obey to him. Unfortunately, I have no way to prove the emotional abuse I am going through everyday and I am now in a very bad situation, being illegal (althoug married to a citizen) in this country.
    Today he told me he would sign at one condition: going back to France on vacation in December. As much as I would like to go back to see my family, I am afraid it is illegal to leave the US before the immigration services allow me to do so. What can I do? How long does it take after sending the petition to be allowed to travel?
    Is there anything I can do? Hire a lawyer to fight him? I did not marry him to get the papers but now that I started studying again and I would just like to be able to stay here until I finish my studies... And I would like to go back to my country legally. After everything he put me through, I should not be the one suffering even more from the situation...Plus he would win the divorce for abandon of our marriage.

    Please help me, I am really going crazy with this and I need to get out of this terrible situation...Thank you in advance.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    Behind a Desk
    Posts
    98,846

    Default Re: Abusing Husband Threatening Not to File the Petition

    It's really a marital issue, not a legal issue, if you lie to him about a future visit to France in order to get him to sign.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Posts
    6

    Default Re: Abusing Husband Threatening Not to File the Petition

    I don't want to lie to him. He has been threatening me not to sign the papers since we got married. It's always "If you wear that outfit, I won't sign the papers", "If you talk to that person again, I won't sign the papers" and now he says he will sign only if I go back to France in December. We got married, he should not use the immigration papers as a way to threaten me! I did not marry him for the papers! I am a student, I could perfectly have stayed in the US on a student visa!
    But now we have been married since March and he still has not done what it takes to regularize my status here! He is using my situation against me to keep me under his control.
    I agree that this is a marital issue but what am I supposed to do legally? Of course I am thinking about a divorce but thanks to him I am now illegal in this country and will face a 3 years ban. Not because I purposely overstayed here but because my husband has held the papers to be able to threaten me whenever he wants!

  4. #4

    Default Re: Abusing Husband Threatening Not to File the Petition

    Unfortunately, the situation you describe is a very common one - a US citizen using immigration status as a control mechanism for a spouse who is here without the proper documentation, VISA, etc.

    Start here:

    http://www.aardvarc.org/dv/immigration.shtml

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Posts
    6

    Default Re: Abusing Husband Threatening Not to File the Petition

    Thank you so much for this link! Now I see I am not alone and I have solutions!

    I have an appointment for next week in a domestic violence center. I really hope they will be able to help me!That is the first step!

    Thank you so much again!

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