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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    i live down by atlantic beach on the coast of NC.

    Default Can the Police Make Me Go Back to My Guardian's Home

    i am in a similar but differnt situation as well.

    I have written alot, and if you wish to not read it then thats fine (but it inclueds important info), my question is at the bottom of my story. thank you for your time - Julie
    when i was 15 my mother sent me to live with my father here on the coast of NC. for those 15 years of my life before, my father and i did not have a relationship, he had hard times with drugs and was never around. my mother and him were not married and he left her when i was a baby for my (now) stepmother. so it was odd that she ws sending me down here to live with him when she knew it would never work. she resides in the Winston-Salem area of NC, so i do not see her much. i begged for a very long time when things got bad at my father (broken things, yelling, ext..), yet my mother still would not let me move home. then at the end of my school year when i was 17 he was placed in jail and i HAD to move back to my mothers, but at this time i did not want to, i was working in school and didnt want to leave, so i found a plce to live (where im currently at) with a family that is very close to my heart. it took two months to convince my mother to let me live with them but she finaly did. now my current situation is that my school has made a wonderful turn around, i use to ake straight Fs and now i am a straiht A+ student in all my classes. but my gardian and i are having several issues.
    she no longer wants me there and i no long want to be there, she gives me the "silent treatment" and refuses to speek to me, when i tell her "i love you" she ignores me (everytime), if i make any movement to hug her of kiss her on the cheek she says "dont touch me!" several time i have said "thank you for dinner it was wonderful" and she will knowingly ignore me and refuse to look at me. this is a reoccuring thing that happens everynight. i feel hurt and alone, but my college is here. my classes and my high schoool, ive made such great progress that i dont want to mess it up, and im possitive that if i move to my mothers it will be ruined.
    i have a safe stable, aproprite pace to live, with my bestfriend (her and her family, they mean alot me, we've been through quite abit and i love them) they have offerd me a place to live and food showers, a way to school everyday, everything, all my bases are coverd 100%. but my mother is pushing for me to move to winston to live with her, her boyfriend, his two daughters, and my half brother. she is very determind and has told me "i dont care!" when we spoke of my college plan. i want to study to be a social worker and i am very set on falowing the path i have chosen. she has told me "no you may not live with karey and her family, make it work where you are now or come home!" obviously my situation here is not working on a personal note, and it is no trouble for me to move 10 miles down the road to a place where i will not be trated like a dog. my mother knows that its hard for me to take these issues here now and shes hoping i will give up and move to w-s with her. but i will not. IF i HAVE to live in these conditions to stay here and to be able to take my college classes then i will. but since it is not nessisary and is clearly distracting and hurtful for me to live where i am now, i do not see it as a problem for me to live with my friend and her family.
    all condtions there are exilent and perfect, I would be so much better off living with them than where i am now.
    i do not want to do this to my mother, i do not want to go against her word because i believe that she really thinks she is doing whats best. but i know that she is not, and that this plan is the best for me and my situaion. i wish greatly that she could see that, and that i could have her support in my desicions about my life. she is my mother, and she will always be my mother. and i will always love her, no matter what. i do wish that i could help her see the right thing in my point of view.

    my question for you is; since my birthday is March 1st, which means i am now 5 months from being 18, can i leave my "gardians" home and move into my friends? Can the police do anything about it? and WILL they do anything about it?
    thank you for your time and advice,
    - Julie

  2. #2

    Default Re: Need Help With Leaving Home - What Can The Police Do?

    CAN they? Yes, they can. If you are 17 years, 364 days, 23 hours, and 59 seconds old, you're at risk.

    WILL they? Only a particular officer summoned to deal with the indicent at the time can tell you that. Different departments respond with differing degrees of enthusiasm, and even within a department, different officers may handle it differenty - some will toss you in the car and wisk you back to parents. Others will tell parents to come get you. Others will simply note that you appear in good health, appear safe, note no other issues, and tell your parents that you're fine and wave goodbye. Without a crystal ball, we can't tell you what WILL happen, we can only tell you what is possible.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    i live down by atlantic beach on the coast of NC.

    Default Re: Need Help With Leaving Home - What Can The Police Do?

    thank you, i didnt expect attitude but thank you for the information i picked up.
    please allow me to "fix" my question earlier,
    i should have frased the question differntly because i did not mean "will they" i ment something for like:
    " how offten do they bring you in?" or " what are the chances?"
    well i supose niether one of those work either.
    im trying to get as much information about this subject that i can,
    but fortunetly i asked myt mother if she would please talk to my friends dad and she did. and she is now "thinking about it".
    so hopefully the fact that she was able to talk to another adult other than my current gardian and she now understands alittlebit better, she will have a better chance of making the right choice.
    but she also informed me that i need to pack my things now because no matter what she decides, i WILL be moving out of my current residence.
    so im hanging at the moment between two choices.
    Winston-Salem Vs. Carteret County

    thank you again, Julie

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