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  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2009
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    12

    Default State Sends Wrong Paternity Letter, Twice

    This deals with the State of Mississippi Social Services and the State of North Carolina where my friend lives

    (And when I say my friend, I mean my friend, lol.)

    So my buddy has confided in me about a personal issue he's dealing with and I really want to help him out. He's not very computer/law literate and I'm just a law school hopeful so I want to point him in the right direction. The State of Mississippi has sent him a letter in North Carolina asking for child support for a child that he says 100% cannot be his (more on this later). They sent this letter while he worked out of town so he gave a family member permission to open the mail and now the entire family thinks he has been hiding a child from them for years. He says they don't believe him and it's gotten to the point where things are being said that could make future relationships with certain family members irreparable. It's causing him a great amount of stress and he wants to take care of it as soon as possible.

    Now, things get interesting because he says he got a very similar letter years ago from Mississippi and when he called to clear that up they admitted that 1600 or so paternity letters had been sent out by clerical error. They are not admitting to anything like that in the case of this new letter however and they are demanding a DNA test.

    When I asked how he could be 100% sure he was not the father he gave the following:
    1) He is a 25 year old white male, the mother is a 40-ish year old black female, and the child is also black - clearly this is possible, but he says he's positive he's stuck to the typical college aged white female population for sex partners
    2) The child suspiciously has the same exact birthday (different year) and the exact same name as him.
    3) At the time of the child's conception, he NEVER traveled outside the state of North Carolina (he would have been in college) and he never met anyone from Mississippi - again, its possible but it just seems unlikely

    He wants to know what he can do to get this cleared up, possibly without the personal violation of submitting to a DNA test. I know it would be the easy way for most people but what he really wants out of this is a written apology from the Mississippi Dept. of Social Services for causing his family this ordeal. If he submits to testing I feel like they would just move on and send the generic "you are not the father" letter without ever addressing that there was clearly a mistake made on their part in the first place.

    That's all i know. If you want me to ask him any more questions the next time I see him I will gladly pass them on if you think it would help. I told him I'd see what I could find out and get back to him as soon as possible.

    Thank you for taking the time out of your day to help!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Florida
    Posts
    2,773

    Default Re: State Sends Wrong Paternity Letter. Twice

    Quote Quoting AnoninNC
    View Post
    This deals with the State of Mississippi Social Services and the State of North Carolina where my friend lives

    (And when I say my friend, I mean my friend, lol.)

    So my buddy has confided in me about a personal issue he's dealing with and I really want to help him out. He's not very computer/law literate and I'm just a law school hopeful so I want to point him in the right direction. The State of Mississippi has sent him a letter in North Carolina asking for child support for a child that he says 100% cannot be his (more on this later). They sent this letter while he worked out of town so he gave a family member permission to open the mail and now the entire family thinks he has been hiding a child from them for years. He says they don't believe him and it's gotten to the point where things are being said that could make future relationships with certain family members irreparable. It's causing him a great amount of stress and he wants to take care of it as soon as possible.

    Now, things get interesting because he says he got a very similar letter years ago from Mississippi and when he called to clear that up they admitted that 1600 or so paternity letters had been sent out by clerical error. They are not admitting to anything like that in the case of this new letter however and they are demanding a DNA test.

    When I asked how he could be 100% sure he was not the father he gave the following:
    1) He is a 25 year old white male, the mother is a 40-ish year old black female, and the child is also black - clearly this is possible, but he says he's positive he's stuck to the typical college aged white female population for sex partners
    2) The child suspiciously has the same exact birthday (different year) and the exact same name as him.
    3) At the time of the child's conception, he NEVER traveled outside the state of North Carolina (he would have been in college) and he never met anyone from Mississippi - again, its possible but it just seems unlikely

    He wants to know what he can do to get this cleared up, possibly without the personal violation of submitting to a DNA test. I know it would be the easy way for most people but what he really wants out of this is a written apology from the Mississippi Dept. of Social Services for causing his family this ordeal. If he submits to testing I feel like they would just move on and send the generic "you are not the father" letter without ever addressing that there was clearly a mistake made on their part in the first place.

    That's all i know. If you want me to ask him any more questions the next time I see him I will gladly pass them on if you think it would help. I told him I'd see what I could find out and get back to him as soon as possible.

    Thank you for taking the time out of your day to help!
    He has 2 choices:

    1. Willingly submit to the DNA test, which hopefully will prove that he is not the father.


    2. He can refuse to voluntarily be tested, then the court can order him to comply with testing.

    IF he chooses to refuse, and still refuses a court order, he would be declared the father by default.

    Submitting to a DNA test is NOT a "personal violation", actually, it is the perfect chance for him to prove that he is NOT the father.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    May 2009
    Posts
    12

    Default Re: State Sends Wrong Paternity Letter. Twice

    i very much disagree with your last statement. if DNA tests aren't in the realm of your personal privacy then why is it you think they have to ask in the first place? why don't they just take it from you?

    and if by chance maybe you just misunderstood, i don't think the actual act of taking a DNA test is invasive. It's the act by force. If the police want to get the DNA of a suspect, they have to have a pretty damn good case for it if it's not volunteered. Play devil's advocate with me here and let's say a woman put the same name as both the father and the child on a birth certificate. She picks a state randomly (Honestly I couldn't even say what is required from the mother on the birth certificate, I've never taken a gander at mine!). Does that mean if there happens to be a man in that state with that name he should be forced to take the DNA test to clear his name?

    I told my friend the first thing I thought to do would be hunt down the contact info for this woman and record some phone conversations. At best she calls Social Services herself and says theres a mistake too.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Location
    Michigan
    Posts
    28,906

    Default Re: State Sends Wrong Paternity Letter. Twice

    How does he know the mother's race, and the appearance of the child?

  5. #5
    Join Date
    May 2009
    Posts
    12

    Default Re: State Sends Wrong Paternity Letter. Twice

    Oh yeah! He said the first letter a few years ago didn't list any names but this new letter did so he either talked to someone at Social Services or he did some googling/background lookup. If i had to guess I'd say he wanted to know exactly what was on the birth certificate that made them think it was him and maybe it's listed there???

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    Behind a Desk
    Posts
    98,846

    Default Re: State Sends Wrong Paternity Letter. Twice

    I'd say it's more likely he knows the mother. Oh, I know, we're supposed to be impressed that he can't remember who he slept with during his drunken college romps, but is pretty sure they were all white, and we're supposed to believe that it's a pure coincidence that the mother named the child after him, but c'mon. That doesn't mean he's the father, but I'm not buying your rationalizations and guesswork.

    As you've been told, your friend has a choice to make: He can either defend against the paternity claim, which will likely involve a cheek swab DNA test, or he can default and in all probability be declared the father and pay child support until the child turns 18 (perhaps longer). His choice.

    If you are in law school, you should consider that whining about rights that don't exist won't help you or your clients achieve the desired outcome. Play "devil's advocate" in class; advise your clients about the law.

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