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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Posts
    12

    Default Self Defense vs Assault

    State: Iowa City

    I and my ex-BF had a fight which turned ugly. He said nasty things and right in front of him I cut my wrist. He started hitting me. I had blood all over the apartment and bumps on my head cause of his hits.

    I reported the incident to the police the next day ( I should have called 911 the SAME DAY ). The officer on duty advised to go and see a doctor. I did the same day and went to Police station again. There another officer took pics of my bumbs on the forehead though the others were under the hair so not visible.

    The police officer took some 10 days for investigation and told me today that the Ex says he hit me cause he wanted to leave and I had threatened him to cut with a razor. The cop also said since there are no witnesses or camera recordings (!!) and entirely two different stories, he cannot file the charge!

    I am feeling HELPLESS. Its after gathering so much of courage I went to police and nothing came out of it. He said I can talk to his supervisor. But will that be fruitful? Am I fighting a lost battle? Please advice.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Posts
    636

    Default Re: Self Defense vs Assault

    Ok first off, be lucky you are not sitting in the hospital right now. Being it seems this is a domestic violence case. In most states the police department do not have a say in the matter. Nor do the people involved. The police have to take the report and turn it into the DA's office. From there it is assigned to a prosecuting attorney. At that point the Prosecuting Attorney decides whether or not there is enough to persue a case.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Posts
    12

    Question Re: Self Defense vs Assault

    Thank you so much for the reply.

    I am an international student and don't have much idea about the legal system here.

    All I knew was I should report it to the police but it seems it has hit the dead end. The Police officer did not talk about DA or anything, in fact said he has written the report and that's all. Nothing further.

    What should I do now?

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Posts
    636

    Default Re: Self Defense vs Assault

    You can contact the DA's office yourself or the Prosecuting Attorney's Office yourself. But before doing so get a copy of the police report. That way you can give it to the Prosecuting Attorney's office on your own.

    Some times when there is not enough evidence to support the crime. The police will take the report and keep it on file. If another incident occurs involving the same two people from before. Then the police can also use that report from the previous incident as evidence. Because it can be used to show character of actions.

    But to seek more advice on your situation you should contact support groups for people that have suffered domestic voilence. You can talk to the police officer that took your report. They usually have the information to get help locally.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Posts
    12

    Question Re: Self Defense vs Assault

    Thank you so much for your time and advice.

    I am in touch with DVIP. Maybe they will be able to put things into perspective for me.

    Thanks once again.

    Another concern is that I will be leaving this country in a month and the accused will be leaving this city in another 10-15 days. Will time be a constraint?

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Posts
    853

    Default Re: Self Defense vs Assault

    You need psychological help. Attempted suicide is a sign of any number of mental disorders.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Posts
    12

    Default Re: Self Defense vs Assault

    Sure.

    At times you are so helpless, and more so when you think you are pregnant and the person, cool as cucumber, says he doesn't believe its his child and you are HELPLESS. You come from a culture where even parents will discard you.

    Yes, you are right.

    And then the person hits you like an animal with blood all over the place and you cannot even provide "proofs" you were hit!

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Posts
    853

    Default Re: Self Defense vs Assault

    Again, please seek some psychological help. Nothing you have said justifies cutting your wrists.

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Posts
    12

    Default Re: Self Defense vs Assault

    Thank you for the concern. Thank you very much. Hope things get better.

    Thanks!

  10. #10

    Default Re: Self Defense vs Assault

    The key to this issue is that police should have been called at the time, as you noted. Not reporting until the next day puts police in the situation of only being able to go on statements from both parties (who by now are OUT of the heat of the moment) and clues to what happened based on documentable injuries. The fact that at least a portion of your injuries were self-inflicted gives his story of self defense against a razor weilding person a good degree of credibility and makes it almost impossible for police to definitively say what did or didn't happen, and WHY (big difference between battery and self defense - and the WHY plays a HUGE part ).

    It should be noted that if police had been summoned at the time, BOTH of you would have likely been removed - he'd have likely been arrested, and you'd have likely been taken to a mental health facility for evaluation.

    There ARE some strange things about our culture, but two elements are consistant: the system is set up for children to be born to married couples, and, whether married or not, the system DOES hold fathers financially accountable for their children to the extent possible. Working outside of that framework means that things get more complicated. When you're not married to the potential father, you get paternity testing done once the baby is born and go from there. If you ARE married to the potential father, the law consideres him to be the father automatically, whether he believes it or not, until it's contested.

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