Custody for Father

[ramr723]

My question involves a child custody case from the State of: fl and pa


my husband has a 9yr old daughter from a previous relationship. 3 yrs ago we moved to fl from pa. even before we moved his ex was constantly moving and changing her number to make sure he could not contact her. her only reason for doing this is that the two of them are not together anymore and she's trying to hurt him. he has not seen his daughter since a few months before we moved here to fl. we have been up to pa twice and he has not been able to contact her. he does pay his child support. unfortunately, the county they live in does not actually have a family court, only domestic relations, so they have basically laughed at him when he asked for any advice in going about finding out where his daughter is living. there is no actual custody order at this time. he recently found out from his father, who still lives in pa, that his ex has given physical custody (not legally or anything) to her mother. this is now the second time she has just handed over the child and decided not to be a mother unless it's convenient for her. he feels that if she is not going to be with her mother then she needs to be with her father, and i agree and support him. we currently can not afford a lawyer and have tried for assistance but unfortunately seeing as we are in fl where pay rate is higher they inform us we are way over, considering they can not make up for the cost of living increase here of course we are way over for their guidelines. i am attempting to handle things on my own, which i understand is not exactly advised but the only choice we have at the current time.

we both had better opportunities at career advancement here in fl which is why we moved in the first place. will it make it impossible that he is so far away in trying to fight for custody? please any help that anyone could give me would be greatly appreciated. you can also reach me ashleeryan72303@aol.com thanks again in advance.

[Mr. Knowitall]

I would suggest finding a way to get a lawyer. If your boyfriend chooses not to hire a lawyer, he can try to petition for modification himself, but as you note that's problematic given the distances and, I assume, his lack of knowledge about laws and court procedures. Unfortunately, I don't know of a good site for finding Florida-specific court forms or instructions on how to represent yourself in a custody battle; but if you dig around you may find one.

[mmmagique]

You really don't know anything.
You don't know why she moves so much, why her number changes so much, or why she is asking her mom for help.
Instead of encouraging your husband to take the child from the family she knows and is there for her, why don't you give up the great opportuinities in Florida (which are not so great right now anyway for most) and encourage him to be near his child?
If you did that, you would have a better chance at custody.
Let me rephrase that; If he did that, HE would have a better chance at custody.
I understand that you believe the child would be better off with you, and that you want the best for all involved.
The best for all involved would actually entail my suggestion above, however. Are you willing to sacrifice $$$ for a child that is not yours?
Only you can say.