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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
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    4

    Default Accident or Aggravated Battery

    This is in the state of Florida.

    So I am in my room very mad at my mother and playing loud music in my room. She tells me to turn it down and I do. She's not happy with how much lower it is and tells me to turn it down lower and I tell her no that I already did. Then she starts yelling and I get sick of it and I turn it down substantially. Then she's still not happy and unplugs the whole radio. I get it back and plug it back in and turn it back on. She then walks across the room, grabs my bat (I used to play softball), and tells me to "get the f*** out of the way". I said no and that she did not buy or give me my radio so she can't take it away. At this point in time I am standing between herself and my radio leaning on my dresser with my hand resting on the top of it (the dresser). Next thing I know my mother swings the bat straight up into the air and straight down on my hand. I yell and call her crazy then go down the street and try to find someone with a phone.
    About 15-20 minutes later I am back at my house speaking with a police officer and paramedics. My mother lies and tells the police that she was trying to hit my radio and I moved my hand in the way causing me to get hit. Then she says she was just trying to hit my dresser to scare me and I moved my hand in the way. My prior thread tells about her pressing Domestic Battery charges on me for defending myself, and the police officer saw this and did not believe a word I told him. He simply ROLLED his eyes at me. I was then taken to an ER and they found no broken bones. Just a contusion and severe bruising. The police officer tells me I'm a lier and continues to be rude and role his eyes at me in the emergency room. I am then told it was an "accident" so I'd be going home with my parents who just almost broke my hand over music and I couldn't press charges. This is the third or fourth time the police have been called due to her hitting me and still nothing is being done other than myself getting charged and arrested.

    I am a minor. What can I do? How do I show them the truth?

  2. #2

    Default Re: Accident or Aggravated Battery

    Quote Quoting knat
    View Post
    This is in the state of Florida.

    So I am in my room very mad at my mother and playing loud music in my room. She tells me to turn it down and I do. She's not happy with how much lower it is and tells me to turn it down lower and I tell her no that I already did. Then she starts yelling and I get sick of it and I turn it down substantially. Then she's still not happy and unplugs the whole radio. I get it back and plug it back in and turn it back on. She then walks across the room, grabs my bat (I used to play softball), and tells me to "get the f*** out of the way". I said no and that she did not buy or give me my radio so she can't take it away.
    If you are a minor, I wouldn't take that statement to the bank. Most of the time parents DO get to make decisions about property under their own roof, even the property of their minor children.

    At this point in time I am standing between herself and my radio leaning on my dresser with my hand resting on the top of it (the dresser). Next thing I know my mother swings the bat straight up into the air and straight down on my hand. I yell and call her crazy then go down the street and try to find someone with a phone.
    About 15-20 minutes later I am back at my house speaking with a police officer and paramedics. My mother lies and tells the police that she was trying to hit my radio and I moved my hand in the way causing me to get hit. Then she says she was just trying to hit my dresser to scare me and I moved my hand in the way. My prior thread tells about her pressing Domestic Battery charges on me for defending myself, and the police officer saw this and did not believe a word I told him. He simply ROLLED his eyes at me.
    Having a history of such conflicts DOES create expectations and preconceptions in such cases - so you need to be overly aware that when more stuff happens, you're not likely to get the benefit of the doubt right off the bat. Not fair, I know, but also realistic. One of the things about being young is that you don't yet have enough experience to understand that there's a difference between being RIGHT, and being HAPPY. You may be right that mom's request about the music was over the top, BUT given the history between you two, sometimes you have to swallow hard and play along, or know that things could get out of hand. Even though mom might have been the aggressor here, since there is a history of her complaining about YOU starting things, the waters are going to be muddied at best.

    I was then taken to an ER and they found no broken bones. Just a contusion and severe bruising.
    Thank goodness - hand injuries with broken bones can be problematic for a VERY long time.

    The police officer tells me I'm a lier and continues to be rude and role his eyes at me in the emergency room. I am then told it was an "accident" so I'd be going home with my parents who just almost broke my hand over music and I couldn't press charges. This is the third or fourth time the police have been called due to her hitting me and still nothing is being done other than myself getting charged and arrested.

    I am a minor. What can I do? How do I show them the truth?
    I'm afraid the answer is one you're not going to like, but it's a truthful one: work more on being happy and come to an understanding that life isn't fair and the good guy doesn't always win. Work to keep a lid on the situation - when things go berzerk, you've already been branded as "the bad guy". You're not likely to change that I'm afraid. So learn from history; a history that should very clearly show you that conflicts between you and mom often end with YOU being the one in trouble with police. Bite your tongue, learn to say "yes,mam, I'm sorry the music bothered you" instead of "get out of my room you bitch", do ask you're asked and keep the peace, even if it's not fair. (And of course learning this skill early in life will serve you in other situations in life too.) All you have to do it make it until you're 18 - then you can go elsewhere and go through similar things with coworkers, bosses, landlords, and other people who can make your life hell, fair or not.

    Try to spend some good constructive time away from home, preferably doing something that will benefit you in the long run, like working so you can save up money to get the heck outta there as soon as that magic birthday hits.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Posts
    4

    Default Re: Accident or Aggravated Battery

    I'm not sure who you are, but you sure do help alot more than I expected anyone to. I'm about to turn 16 so I've still got some time left. There was a social worker out today and she took my mother's side. Of course. They are trying to send me to a facility to separate me from society "not for my own good but for the good of the family". Which I don't understand at all. But there's a group of us working to change it from an "accident" to "battery with a deadly weapon" with the Sheriff's Office. Wish me luck!

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    California
    Posts
    20,594

    Default Re: Accident or Aggravated Battery

    Who is a "group of us"?

    Frankly, you lost the battle when you took the radio back from mom. While she probably should not have wielded a bat for any reason, the police likely saw YOUR actions as being the ones that instigated the actions.

    Okay, so what are your plans if mom gets charged and you get removed from the home? You DO understand that this does no mean you get to go stay with your friends, right? It means a group home or foster care, sometimes far away, and almost always with some very serious restrictions (aka "rules"). As a foster parent myself, I know how this works.

    Aardvarc gave some very cogent advice. It will likely be a far more productive use of your time to try and make nice and improve your life than it will be to try and get mom in trouble ... especially since it is unlikely that the police are going to suddenly change their minds.

    - Carl

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Posts
    853

    Default Re: Accident or Aggravated Battery

    There MUST be more to this.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    California
    Posts
    20,594

    Default Re: Accident or Aggravated Battery

    Quote Quoting divemedic
    View Post
    There MUST be more to this.
    It's either an extremely devious mother who enjoys tormenting her teenage daughter, or, a teenage daughter that thinks she should rule the roost.

    I'm leaning towards the latter ... but, I'm not a party to the whole thing, so I am just guessing.

    - Carl

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