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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
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    2

    Default Mother Trying to Get Custody

    My question involves a child custody case from the State of: California

    My husband's ex-wife is filing a motion for custody, to change from joint legal and sole physical (we have the girls) sole custody to her. Her grounds are things we did that we've been told by our attorney that she might get custody for. One of the big things is that she is coming after me because I have said pretty nasty things about her to the kids, which she got proof of.

    Others are order violations, refusal to provide her with medication of one of the girls (she didn't pay for it) when they go to her home, and we don't like her giving things to the girls (it's our house, our family - she tries to sneak photos of her in with the girls, etc.).

    The girls call me mom, and she's going on about that because a few years ago my husband was short-sighted enough to sign an agreement that the girls would be discouraged from calling anyone other than her Mom. Now she has found out that the girls call me mom (I love that they do), and that I have told them that she is their biological mom, and that was about all she is (really, she's not a good person).

    I have lost my temper with her a couple of times, and once attacked her because she said something to me I felt was mean.

    We have been trying to find a way to take all rights from her, and the girls say things sometimes about how she is when they are with her that make us think she's not responsible. She doesn't pay child support regularly, but she does visit them (She lives in Utah, we live in California-she comes here every month to have them for a weekend), but I am mom when she is not.

    She found out that I put her on a blacklist at their day care place and didn't tell the school about her (so they refused to release any information to her).
    We've lied a couple of times and made false accusations in court about things (a mistake, we know), but that's because she doesn't deserve her kids, and we wanted to make sure she didn't. She is using that too.

    Is all of this grounds for her to take custody from us?

    What we have against her should be enough to stop her:

    4 years ago she was arrested for prostitution, but the charges were dropped. Still admissible, right? What court is going to give custody to a prostitute?

    She's a single mother, we provide a 2-parent home.

    We make a lot more money than she does.

    The girls have lived primarily with us for over 7 years now. Moving them to Utah would hurt them, right?

    She isn't regular with her child support, and is in arrears, and her argument is that she has had to pay for her own visitation expenses (more than child support SUPPOSEDLY).

    Please tell me we have enough to stop her. Our attorney isn't saying much, except that we need to be apologetic in court, that that's what will help us most. That's not good enough.

    I know we haven't been perfect, and, taking advantage of anonymity, I have tried to be as clear her as possible to get a non-biased answer. Their mother is disgusting, and no way should she get the kids. What can we do to stop her in her tracks?

    Thank you.

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