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  1. #1
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    Question Is Child Support Reduced when Father Has Another Child

    My question involves child support in the State of: VA
    I wanted to know based on Virginia Laws; if me and my fiancé have a child can he go back to the courts to have his child support reduced or amended to reflect this other child’s expense he needs to share in? He has not hired an attorney (which by all means not by just this but regarding soo many other issues that I could go into he knows he needs to obtain one) he is already being shafted royally via the Culpeper County Court System when it comes to what he is having to pay.

    If the answer to this is no (possibly because they would view it as both parents are together with 2 incomes so they wouldn't look to reduce it) would it make a difference in it being reduced if I was to take him to court for child support (especially being we would have a child out of wedlock, I know normally they’d suggest to make things set in stone from the beginning if you are not married to go to court and have a custody, visitation and child support set in the courts so that way in the event things did go south there is no time frame of confusion or anyone being screwed in any of those areas)? I am not asking because I expect anything to go bad, but am looking to make sure that a child I have with him doesn’t do without/suffers purely because backyard Culpeper County Courts are taking him to the cleaners until he hires a cut throat attorney to come fight his battles.

    I know it sounds bad that I am asking this, but to be honest with the court system and their child support percentage breakdown based on the exgirlfriend/mothers income and my fiancé’s income well because she's lazy trash and chooses not to better herself not only for herself but for her child as well, he's paying this extreme amount of child support while she just sits back with her petty BS job (Because it’s based on both incomes they take the total amount of his and hers and well with his being a lot more than hers instead of making it 50/50 since they are claiming the child is just as much his responsibility as it is hers, they are saying because he makes more money than his percentage is a lot higher..funny thing also he pays more while only being able to get his son 4 times a month..not by his choice but based on the mother moved living almost 2 hours away). This also includes the fact that on top of the child support he pays each month he also was just recently ordered to pay a percentage of ALL out of pocket medical..meaning each time we pick him up she hands us these receipts from doctors visits, trips to cvs because he had a cough/cold, you name it she has a receipt for it so that's an extra add on between $100-$400.00 extra a month he has to pay out on top of the outrageous child support amount he already pays monthly...

    So my point in it sounding bad and not wanting it to come across that way is, while she sits back and uses the child support to pay for things and a life she by no means could afford even if she didn't have a child (ie an apartment, 2 vehicles, 3 cell phones, eating out pretty much every day) I feel with all that said if the courts didn't lower the child support based on my fiancé having another child I find that unfair, I find it them stating the only child they acknowledge or believe deserves anything from him is the 1st child. I don't see how the courts could state how 1 child is more deserving than the other.

    Any info or insight on this would be much appreciated. As this is a situation where all ducks need to be in a row..we are dealing with a woman that it’s not about the child’s best interest its’ about even if she was given exactly what was needed to pay for my fiancés share of his sons expenses she wants more because she depends on that extra money to take up for her lack of doing more in life..she’s one of those mothers

  2. #2
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    Default Re: Is Child Support Reduced when Father Has Another Child

    There are hundreds of child support calculators on the internet.

    Run five or six and tell us what you come up with.

  3. #3
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    Question Re: Is Child Support Reduced when Father Has Another Child

    I do not understand how the child support calculator is going to answer my question. I want to know that if I have a child with my fiancé will his current child support be reduced if he goes back for a reduction based on the fact that he now will have 2 children he needs to support.

    I thought I had read somewhere that in Virginia even if me and my fiancé have a child together that because we reside together (not separate like him and his ex/child's mother he currently pays support for) the state views it as the child has both parents with 2 incomes in the household so they would not look to reduce his current support or take into consideration that he now has another child he is responsible for as well. It pretty much made out like the only way the state/courts would acknowledge or take the new child into consideration with regards to a reduction would be for me to take him to court for child support. Once that was enforced via the courts, he would request a reduction based on his income and now having enforced child support for 2 children set up via the courts.

    By no means am I asking or not wanting him to continue to hold up his obligations to his first child (which mind you I love myself dearly as if he was my own). With that said a new born is more of a financial burden than a 6 year old that is in school full time, along with the fact that no matter what they are both his children and I think the courts should view that no matter what no child is more deserving of his care (financially) more than the other (less little things like childcare and daily cost that one based on the age does not require while the other based on their age does).

    I am just looking to have everything together and I've learned to not expect what should be "obvious" when it comes to the courts here in VA, because I feel by no means are things always approached equally or as they would be had you come to court with an attorney. (which I think is another stupid equation...I think if you are intelligent enough to do your homework and come to court prepared to fight your own battle, bring with you printed records of reports, cases, laws stating you are in the right and you are the clear winner in this case...a lot of judges could care less, they rule as they want and suggest you hire an attorney (which by no means can everyone afford currently).

  4. #4
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    Post Re: Is Child Support Reduced when Father Has Another Child

    My fiancé is currently being shafted big time via the Culpeper Court System, they are allowing his son's mother to bully and harass him via the system. It is sad the joke this court system is making of itself yet it is even sadder how a father that is desperately trying to just be a good father keeps getting knocked back and the mother which is the bad (and even mental) person in this situation is being rewarded. No money for a lawyer well just suck it up and take it. I just want to make sure that when we have a child that all of this is clear and obvious, because I can tell you right now as soon as his sons mother catches wind that we are having a child and she thinks she's even getting $10.00 less a month from the extreme amount she gets now..the claws are coming out and she won't stop until she wins (and she's someone that it's not beneath her to lie to the courts either, she was already called out on that one once..she received the "don't do that one again speech" but that's it, which is sad since the child only being 6 years old she has taken him to court almost 20 times.

    He only filed a charge against her 1 time for a reduction in child support when he found out his son had been in school full time for a year (she was lying and saying instead of him being in preschool that he was going to this daycare) and also for alienation of child (because she would talk badly about my fiancé making up stories about him and telling his son and also because she would not allow him to talk to his son when he would call) Well the outcome from that case…she counter acted his claim with a request to increase the child support, so he received a summons for a court date for her “increase” letting him know that his reduction hearing and alienation of child hearing was cancelled because the judge would not be in that day but yet they didn’t give him another court date, they said he needed to come up and file again. WE LIVE 2 HOURS AWAY so for him to do this Mon-Fri when they are open requires him to miss another days work. Besides HELLO…he scheduled for a reduction if she felt she needed or deserved more isn’t that her time to present her side at that hearing…I guess not. As for the alienation of child, they asked him if he had set up “phone visitations” via his original custody docs. They said he has to take her to court for phone visitations otherwise she is not required to have the child speak with him via the phones or anytime it is not his court appointed visitation time/days…can you believe that a father that only gets his child 4 times a month that wants to speak to his child maybe for 1 or 2 min. on the phone the other 26 days (not even everyday) out of the month he doesn’t have him is being told he’s not allowed to unless he takes her to court for phone visitation. God forbid she took him to court saying he didn’t make any other effort besides what the court assigned him for his days/times they’d say he was a worthless father and that it’s harder on her and she needs more money to compensate…it’s sad, and we could really use some good advice (even if someone knows of an attorney or program that works with people when they can’t come out of pocket with that big retainer attorney fee).

  5. #5
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    Default Re: Is Child Support Reduced when Father Has Another Child

    I do not understand how the child support calculator is going to answer my question. I want to know that if I have a child with my fiancé will his current child support be reduced if he goes back for a reduction based on the fact that he now will have 2 children he needs to support.
    the general answer is; no. The court will not take his new child with you into account when considering his other childs CS.

    The judge might tell him he should have kept things put away if he couldn't afford to have 2 children but there is no reason his first child should suffer because he couldn't.

  6. #6

    Default Re: Is Child Support Reduced when Father Has Another Child

    Quote Quoting iienvyme
    View Post
    My question involves child support in the State of: VA
    I wanted to know based on Virginia Laws; if me and my fiancé have a child can he go back to the courts to have his child support reduced or amended to reflect this other child’s expense he needs to share in?
    Absolutely not. while judges can deviate from the guidelines, that never deviate for this because it is the responsibility of the parent paying CS to adjust his budget and lifestyle to provide for his current children for which he pays support. Hence, if he can barely afford the children he has, then it would be senseless to have more.

  7. #7

    Default Re: Is Child Support Reduced when Father Has Another Child

    Quote Quoting iienvyme
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    My fiancé is currently being shafted big time via the Culpeper Court System, they are allowing his son's mother to bully and harass him via the system.

    thats not a CS issue. if its legally harrassment, then he needs to motion for an RO.

    It is sad the joke this court system is making of itself yet it is even sadder how a father that is desperately trying to just be a good father keeps getting knocked back and the mother which is the bad (and even mental) person in this situation is being rewarded.

    Well, the good father, once had a relationship with the bad mother so she couldnt and cant be all that bad.

    No money for a lawyer well just suck it up and take it.
    If he cares enough, he can educate himself enough to not need a lawyer

    I just want to make sure that when we have a child that all of this is clear and obvious, because I can tell you right now as soon as his sons mother catches wind that we are having a child and she thinks she's even getting $10.00 less a month from the extreme amount she gets now..the claws are coming out and she won't stop until she wins (and she's someone that it's not beneath her to lie to the courts either, she was already called out on that one once..she received the "don't do that one again speech" but that's it, which is sad since the child only being 6 years old she has taken him to court almost 20 times.
    When your child is born, his child support will not be lowered. And yes, mom has a right to file for a CS review periodically. The drama will not be an issue, only the numbers, his and her salaries among other things. Now is not the time complain as you were very aware of your fiance's financial obligations to his kids when you met him.


    He only filed a charge against her 1 time for a reduction in child support when he found out his son had been in school full time for a year (she was lying and saying instead of him being in preschool that he was going to this daycare) and also for alienation of child (because she would talk badly about my fiancé making up stories about him and telling his son and also because she would not allow him to talk to his son when he would call) Well the outcome from that case…she counter acted his claim with a request to increase the child support, so he received a summons for a court date for her “increase” letting him know that his reduction hearing and alienation of child hearing was cancelled because the judge would not be in that day but yet they didn’t give him another court date, they said he needed to come up and file again.
    That was at the courts discretion. What is the status of his case now? It is hard to prove PAS which is why some courts dont give it much attention without hard evidence.

    WE LIVE 2 HOURS AWAY so for him to do this Mon-Fri when they are open requires him to miss another days work. Besides HELLO…he scheduled for a reduction if she felt she needed or deserved more isn’t that her time to present her side at that hearing…I guess not.
    Some parents feel if they are going to get dragged back into court, they may as well get their requests heard at the same time. How long had it been since the last CS review and modification. If its been more than years, then she is entitled to a review.


    As for the alienation of child, they asked him if he had set up “phone visitations” via his original custody docs. They said he has to take her to court for phone visitations otherwise she is not required to have the child speak with him via the phones or anytime it is not his court appointed visitation time/days…can you believe that a father that only gets his child 4 times a month that wants to speak to his child maybe for 1 or 2 min. on the phone the other 26 days (not even everyday) out of the month he doesn’t have him is being told he’s not allowed to unless he takes her to court for phone visitation.
    Unfortunately with difficult parents, you have to get everything in a court order to get them to comply.


    God forbid she took him to court saying he didn’t make any other effort besides what the court assigned him for his days/times they’d say he was a worthless father and that it’s harder on her and she needs more money to compensate…it’s sad, and we could really use some good advice (even if someone knows of an attorney or program that works with people when they can’t come out of pocket with that big retainer attorney fee).[/QUOTE]

    He needs to keep fighting til the court rules on the issue. Unfortunately, there is nothing he can do about the CS review, as it is a state law to allow periodic reviews for change in circumstance.

  8. #8
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    Default Re: Is Child Support Reduced when Father Has Another Child

    Quote Quoting jk
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    the general answer is; no. The court will not take his new child with you into account when considering his other childs CS.

    So you mean that just because someone has a child that means they can't continue on in life and move on, possibly getting married and having another child again...purely because when he had the 1st child he was young with not a lot of expenses so they set the child support to take an amount of money that would make it impossible for him to do much else in life besides pay for that child (between the support amount and the 53% of all out of pocket medical expenses every month which tack on anywhere from $200-400 more)?

    The judge might tell him he should have kept things put away if he couldn't afford to have 2 children but there is no reason his first child should suffer because he couldn't.
    As for this comment it just really was uncalled for. Yes he learned the hard way that even when both are using protection (or so you might think) things can still happen...yes even after only dating someone for 3 months. Point is maybe if they revamped the Child Support/Custody system opposed to still using the one set in place what...30 or more years ago, I think things might be a bit more equal between custodial and non custodial parents. Plus as much as there are scumbag non custodial dads out there, there are good ones dealing with whitetrash custodial mothers that are using the legal system to harass the father while mentally screwing up their child as well.

  9. #9
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    Default Re: Is Child Support Reduced when Father Has Another Child

    Quote Quoting 1parent
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    thats not a CS issue. if its legally harrassment, then he needs to motion for an RO.




    Well, the good father, once had a relationship with the bad mother so she couldnt and cant be all that bad.
    *Well when you first state dating someone they call it the "Honeymoon stage" when 3 months into that she tells you she's pregnant (even though 2 forms of protection were supposidely being used...ooppss she must of missed one of her pills or didn't work) well guess didn't give you time to really know what kind of person each other might be...as bad as it sounds it is what it is..and lets not act like everyone waits more than 3 months into a relationship before they start to have sex (not everyone practices the prim and proper way to live life).*


    If he cares enough, he can educate himself enough to not need a lawyer

    *You can educate yourself all you want...when you stand before a judge making a ruling who are you to call the judge out and tell him that's not how it's going to work...because you printed off this this or that via the internet*


    When your child is born, his child support will not be lowered. And yes, mom has a right to file for a CS review periodically. The drama will not be an issue, only the numbers, his and her salaries among other things. Now is not the time complain as you were very aware of your fiance's financial obligations to his kids when you met him.

    *Well his financial obligation continues to go up every year even though the child has gone from full time daycare to fulltime school, so as for being aware you can have an idea but never would you expect it to continue to go up when the child actual expenses that CS cover are show that it should be lowered*




    That was at the courts discretion. What is the status of his case now? It is hard to prove PAS which is why some courts dont give it much attention without hard evidence.



    Some parents feel if they are going to get dragged back into court, they may as well get their requests heard at the same time. How long had it been since the last CS review and modification. If its been more than years, then she is entitled to a review.




    Unfortunately with difficult parents, you have to get everything in a court order to get them to comply.


    God forbid she took him to court saying he didn’t make any other effort besides what the court assigned him for his days/times they’d say he was a worthless father and that it’s harder on her and she needs more money to compensate…it’s sad, and we could really use some good advice (even if someone knows of an attorney or program that works with people when they can’t come out of pocket with that big retainer attorney fee).
    He needs to keep fighting til the court rules on the issue. Unfortunately, there is nothing he can do about the CS review, as it is a state law to allow periodic reviews for change in circumstance.[/QUOTE]

    *Trust me she never misses a chance to go back to court for a review when it comes to an increase...according to her that's what allows her to thank us for "her new purse"...

    *Please before responding with something rude or smart remember you aren't talking to someone that has a fiance that is a lazy no good not looking to take care of their child father...we are talking about a good father that has been fighting (even offered the judge to take his son...with no CS needed from her) that's dealing with a mother that in order for her to get her way or what she wants lies to the courts and the child is suffering..the child has emotional, behavioral problems and it not only reflects when we get him every other weekend but also reflects in school when they are giving a 6 year old inschool suspension (I think it's been 3 or 4 times so far)*

  10. #10
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    Default Re: Is Child Support Reduced when Father Has Another Child

    Quote:
    Quoting jk
    the general answer is; no. The court will not take his new child with you into account when considering his other childs CS.

    So you mean that just because someone has a child that means they can't continue on in life and move on, possibly getting married and having another child again...purely because when he had the 1st child he was young with not a lot of expenses so they set the child support to take an amount of money that would make it impossible for him to do much else in life besides pay for that child (between the support amount and the 53% of all out of pocket medical expenses every month which tack on anywhere from $200-400 more)?
    Of course they can continue on with their lives BUT the first child remains the first priority. Anything after that is a decision he makes knowing what his current obligations are. I he chooses to have 27 children after having the first one, that is his choice and the first child should not suffer becuase dad wanted to have more children with another woman. That's life. Apparently you have a hard time understanding; this is a choice he made before you came into the picture and regardless what happens with you, that first child does not deserve to recieve less because dad wanted a new life with you.


    CS is not based on his expenses. There is a standard base allowed for expenses. If he has more than that, that is his choice. The child should not suffer becuase of dads choices to spend his money on other things. and what is wrong with paying roughly half of the childs additional expenses? Mom has to pay for the other half. Sounds fair to me.

    The judge might tell him he should have kept things put away if he couldn't afford to have 2 children but there is no reason his first child should suffer because he couldn't.


    As for this comment it just really was uncalled for. Yes he learned the hard way that even when both are using protection (or so you might think) things can still happen...yes even after only dating someone for 3 months. Point is maybe if they revamped the Child Support/Custody system opposed to still using the one set in place what...30 or more years ago, I think things might be a bit more equal between custodial and non custodial parents. Plus as much as there are scumbag non custodial dads out there, there are good ones dealing with whitetrash custodial mothers that are using the legal system to harass the father while mentally screwing up their child as well.
    Uncalled for? If you say so but it is realistic. He chose to have sex with a person. Children can be the result. It is a choice he made. He lives with it. I still don;t see anything wrong with the CS calculations used now. As to be equal; do you believe what dad pays actually pays for 1/2 of all the expenses incurred by and for the child? It generally doesn't.

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