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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Posts
    14

    Default Mother is Not Appearing in Court

    Hey. This is in State of TN.

    I have a friend, yes it is for a friend, I have my own issues that have been answered on here. He too is going thru a custody case. Both parents live in TN and mom moved to Memphis and he is in Nashville. First court date was 11/17/08 and she did not show and her atty continued it. Last court date was 12/22/08 and once again atty continued it. Both times it was continued due to financial reasons limiting her ability to travel. He is thinking she is just stalling so that she can go into court and say it wouldn't be good for the child to move as he is adjusted to his new enviroment.

    If she does not show next time, can he ask the judge to deny the continuation as she has had ample time to be here and make arrangements and proceed with the hearing or does she have to be there?

    Could he ask for custody of his son on a Temp basis until she decides to show up in court?

    He can prove she is unfit and has police reports, child services reports, witnesses for the case. His reason for question is because he will have people in court to testify about her character and actions and he thinks she has the right to question those witnesses. Or is that right waived bc her atty is there and she has failed again to show up?

    Thanks
    Rob for Matt

  2. #2

    Default Re: What Are His Options

    He can prove she is unfit and has police reports, child services reports, witnesses for the case. His reason for question is because he will have people in court to testify about her character and actions and he thinks she has the right to question those witnesses.
    If police or child services had deemed the child in danger or her unfit, the child would have ALREADY been removed. The judge will know this. Going into court with this strategy isn't going to bode well for him, yet, parents try this all the time - even though it usually stacks the deck against them from the start. Courts aren't in the habit of believing his or his attorney's version of events over the outside interventions, reports, and interactions of police and child services (parties not acting in their own interests - who, until this point, have NOT removed the child). Remember, whatever faults and character problems she has, he CHOSE her to be the other parent to their child. When dealing blows in court, every fault that he finds is a fault that casts HIM in a poor light too. When one parent tries to go to court and tear the other parent a new one, it often backfires. His better course of action is to concentrate on showing the court what a good parent HE can be and how he is planning to work TOGETHER so that both parents can make the best life for their child (if she's NOT willing to do the same, her own arguements will be damaging enough to her). I'm not saying it's right or wrong or even fair, only that courts have a STRONG interest in having BOTH parents working for the CHILD, and tend to not favor parties who come across as only concentrating on kicking the other parent who will STILL be part of raising that child. If he wants to show up and start kicking, that's certainly his right...but isn't likely to get him an outcome he's hoping for.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Posts
    14

    Default Re: Mother is Not Appearing in Court

    I understand where your coming from and Matt is on the same page. He has really prepared as far as what he can bring to the table as being a great parent. His only concern is that she keeps continuing the court date. His plan is to go in and say your honor this is what I can do and provide for my child. He only plans to use witnesses and reports, if and when the judge asks him what his concerns are.

    So can he ask the judge to deny continuation and proceed with custody case for the next hearing should they try to do that again?

  4. #4

    Default Re: Mother is Not Appearing in Court

    He most certainly can ask - and even though it seems a minor consideration, try to keep things always in terms of the child and the child's interests...as in..."my child hasn't been able to spend time with me in x amount of time", as opposed to "I haven't gotten to see my child in x amount of time" or "my child hasn't been able to attend little leage games or bond with me" as opposed to "his vindictive mother is being a bitch and keeping from me". When one parent does this, and keeps things in the interests of the child, it really makes it stand out when the OTHER parent doesn't - and that doesn't go un-noticed to the judge.

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