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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Posts
    9

    Default Child Support Termination

    My question involves child support in the State of: Pennsylvania



    I have 2 children to my ex fiance`. Ages 4 and 7 months. We just left our umptenth child support hearing yesterday regarding increasing my support. Good news is it didnt get increased even though Im working a new job it got decreased. After leaving the meeting and having things squared away my ex calls me and tells me that she would rather have me pay her out of pocket rather than go through the system because of her own reasons. I find it relieving on my end just because of the whole frustrations I have with domestic relations here in PA. Im a good father whos always worked and always taken care of my kids but I was taken to domestics just for a "guarantee" that Ill continue to provide for my kids. Which is understandable and I see where shes coming from. But again like I said Im tired of all the frustrations that I have with domestics because they treat me and talk to me as if Im one of those dead beat dads.

    Anyways, my ex told me that if I agree to pay her every other week out of pocket then she would drop the support order all together.

    My questions are will she be able to terminate the order as a whole? What will happen to my arrears? and what would I need to do on my end as far as the order being terminated.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Florida
    Posts
    2,773

    Default Re: Child Support Termination

    Quote Quoting jlporcher
    View Post
    My question involves child support in the State of: Pennsylvania



    I have 2 children to my ex fiance`. Ages 4 and 7 months. We just left our umptenth child support hearing yesterday regarding increasing my support. Good news is it didnt get increased even though Im working a new job it got decreased. After leaving the meeting and having things squared away my ex calls me and tells me that she would rather have me pay her out of pocket rather than go through the system because of her own reasons. I find it relieving on my end just because of the whole frustrations I have with domestic relations here in PA. Im a good father whos always worked and always taken care of my kids but I was taken to domestics just for a "guarantee" that Ill continue to provide for my kids. Which is understandable and I see where shes coming from. But again like I said Im tired of all the frustrations that I have with domestics because they treat me and talk to me as if Im one of those dead beat dads.

    Anyways, my ex told me that if I agree to pay her every other week out of pocket then she would drop the support order all together.

    My questions are will she be able to terminate the order as a whole? What will happen to my arrears? and what would I need to do on my end as far as the order being terminated.
    Never agree to pay anything directly to an ex, or agree to drop a court order.

    Although it can be a hassle at times, a court order, and paying through the court protects YOU. You will always have a record of payments, and your ex wouldn't be able to pull any tricks, such as falsely claiming non payment.
    You mentioned that you have gone to court many times, has you ex always filed the motion/petitions? Just imagine what it will be like if you don't have the protection of a court order and absolute proof of payments through the court.

    It's unfortunate, but typically true that most fathers, even ones who pay their CS are treated lousy by the CSE agencies. However, having them involved is more protection for you, even if they do treat you like dirt.

    Before you make a final decision PLEASE get a consult with a local attorney.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Posts
    9

    Default Re: Child Support Termination

    Yes the majority of the time she has been the one to file for motions or petitions. Ive only filed a modification to lower my support on my own once and was denied because to the counselor I didnt give significant means for lowering my support even though my ex said that she would agree at the time of the conference.

    How would I not being able to show proof that I would be paying her? I was planning on paying her each time in check or money order so that I have a receipt showing what I paid her.

    My thing is I want to still be able to support my kids without having johnny law breathing down my neck and I dont want to be faced with the possibility of going to court or jail if I run into hard times. Shes not the type to harass about things she would understand because I always come through for my kids and always have.

    In my last message I left some questions, can you answer them for me?

  4. #4

    Default Re: Child Support Termination

    if you have arrears u wont be able to get away with that, and as for her dropping it, its already done she cant stop that, the collection will still come after your arrears,
    you might be giving her money, and behind u getting welfare again.
    but worst come to worst u can get receipts, and have her signed a documents.
    actually it can be done, its just the owed one are need to be paid.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Posts
    9

    Default Re: Child Support Termination

    So all in all, she's able to drop the support case just like that? I'll still have to pay back my arrears, and I wont have the law breathing down my neck anymore?

    My main safety net with the whole ordeal is that I'll have receipts/carbon copy checks to back up what Ive paid out to her. Would it be a safer bet to have her sign something agreeing that we both agree with me paying her out of pocket "X" amount of money every other week?

  6. #6

    Default Re: Child Support Termination

    if u are currently receiving order to pay your child support with your arrears, and the monthly support, then if u have a hearing you could have done resolve there, and if u dont have any court date coming, then that lady will have to call her lawyer. to let the lawyer about it. so therefore u will no longer have to pay more, except for the arrears coz that is not dischargeable.
    and yes u need copy whenever u buy and give that lady (your ex) so u can prove it.
    there is a lot of notary that asked 10 bucks to have it notarized also where u can make a written agreement and have her signed it
    Never verbal writen
    sorry my boss is here.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Posts
    9

    Default Re: Child Support Termination

    Ok, thanks. neither one of us has a lawyer when we go to our domestics conferences. So what your saying is have everything notarized and/or have a written and signed (by both of us) statement acknowledging that we set up this agreement?

    Now on her end will she just file for a modification to terminate the support order? After that will we have another conference stating that the order is terminated and that I have to just pay back my arrearages, right?

    As far as paying back my arrears will it be a set amount a month or will it be just something that I have to pay off in my lifetime?

  8. #8

    Default Re: Child Support Termination

    u will be paying that arrears until it is paid off, yes shes just gotta do that, and both of u signed a notarized aggreement and have urself get a copy of everything, from the agreement and payment.
    Depends on the arrears you owe, if u only owe 5k or 10k and has to pay 137 a month then it should not be a lifetime.
    the arrears cannot be drop, or discharged.
    What was the lowest child support payment they asked u.
    Usually they determine it by how much u earn.

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