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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Aug 2008

    Unhappy Grandparents Rights in Kentucky

    My question involves grandparents rights in the State of: Kentucky....

    My mother recently filed a petition for visitation rights with my 6 year old daughter. While my parents have played an active roll in my child's life the past 6 years, my mother is constantly belittling me, telling me what a horrible person and horrible mother I am and repeatedly threatens to take my daughter away from me. When my mother doesn't get her way with my daughter, she threatens to kill herself. Both my older sister and I have heard her say this.

    My daughter's father and I have been married the past 4 years but separated almost 3 of them. I have primary custody of her(informal arrangement between the her father and I) and he is a very active part of our daughter's life. Both of us work full time jobs and for two years after we separated, I cared for our daughter all on my own, with her father and my mother getting regular visitation.

    I lost a job I had for 7 years in May of 2007 and in December, I lost my new car. At the beginning of 2008, my daughter briefly stayed with her father and briefly stayed with my mother(less than 3 months) after I lost my car until I could get a new one.

    I now live in the same town as my parents, renting the upstairs of my friend's parent's house, work full time and take care of not only my daughter, but my 21 month old son.

    Shortly after I got my new car, my mother and I had a severe falling out and I promptly took my daughter out of my mother's care after she once again threatened to take my daughter.

    After repeated threats and blackmail, my mother filed a petition for visitation. There has been no court ordered visitation set but I have voluntarily been letting my mother visit with my daughter at the park on Sunday's after church. I won't let her be alone with her after her threats of taking her and her threats of suicide.

    Her and my stepdad stepped out of line during their visitation today, getting in my face, calling me retarded, an alcoholic(I am FAR from an alcoholic, although I should be after growing up with her as a mother... lol) and telling me they couldn't stand me... all in front of my daughter and my son. Not to mention, she was telling me(in front of my daughter again) that my daughter's father has no rights concerning our daughter... that she has more rights than him. We have, at no time since our daughter's birth, signed our rights over AT ALL to my parents. My parents seem to think that their name will get them what they want in the courts because both of my grandparents worked in the legal system in our town at one point.

    Both my daughter's father and I, along with my sister and quite a few of my aunts and cousins on my mother's side of the family, believe that my mother is mentally unstable and should have no rights whatsoever concerning my daughter and definitely should not be allowed to have unsupervised visitations. My sister even refuses to let her around my niece, nor is my mother concerned with spending time with my niece OR my son.

    My daughter is happy and healthy where she is at. She loves her school, she attends church regularly, and since we've moved to where we are at now, she has made a lot of friends at church that she would not get to spend time with if weekend visitations were granted, like my parents are going for.

    I will be completely furious, heartbroken and devastated if my parents are granted any kind of rights or unsupervised visitation once this gets into a court where it can actually be tried(2 judges have excused themselves from this case in our county because they are family friends and couldn't ethically try the case...) How can I stop this from happening???

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Toledo, OH

    Default Re: Grandparents Rights in Kentucky

    How can I stop this from happening?
    Do you have an attorney? If you don't, you need to get one.

    In the state of Kentucky, the courts may grant "reasonable" visitation rights to grandparents, provided they can show that visitation is in the best interests of the child.

    Your mother sounds like she needs serious mental help. It shouldn't be difficult to argue that allowing your child to spend unsupervised time in the company of a suicidal drama queen is hardly in her best interests. HOWEVER -you should not do it yourself. Tell your lawyer everything and let him argue it from a dispassionate point of view.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Aug 2008

    Default Re: Grandparents Rights in Kentucky

    I do have a lawyer and I've been told by another lawyer that referred us to her that she could lawyer circles around my parent's lawyer who has only been practicing for 2-3 years. I really hope she's right! My lawyer knows everything that's been going on and has copies of all the emails between my mother and I. My mother's emails clearly display her threats and blackmail along with a sharp change in personality in some of them(nice and chatty in one message and nasty and hateful and threatening in the messages following...) I believe that my mother is aware of the statute and is trying to make it look like I abuse and neglect my daughter in order to win her case. My daughter will tell you straight out that I don't abuse her... she says I'm mean sometimes when I make her clean up her messes and won't let her have her way all the time... lol. What kid doesn't say their parents are mean when they don't get their way?? LOL But my daughter is in no way abused. Her only concern about going back to my mother's house is because all of her things are there.. my mother refuses to give them to me. I'm not sure what she's gaining by keeping a 6 year old's things from her... doesn't matter who bought them for her... But it's been going on for 3 months now.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Sep 2008

    Default Re: Grandparents Rights in Kentucky

    You are smart to document the emails. Carry a pocket recorder with you at all times. This also works great at traffic stops. Ask your friends for a lawyer they have used that has the reputation as a shark. Do not answer the phone when they call, let their message go to voice mail and keep the recording. Document every threat made along with witnesses. Never agree to anything or sign any documents. Stop all communication with them. Everything you say will be used against you. You do not have to go to mediation unless the court orders it. This has worked for me here in Ohio for two years now. Best of luck!

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