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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Posts
    1

    Default Child Is Being Held At Fathers And Not Able To See Mother - Is This Child Abduction?

    Ok...my estranged husband took my daughter for brunch with the Easter Bunny on Sun 3/16 with my permission and the understanding that she would be brought back that evening. When she did not show up I called him and was told that she would be back on Wed 3/19. She was not brought back and have not seen her to this date.
    I know where she is and what the Illinois abduction law is but the police will not listen to me. I have copies of the abduction law in illinois but it does not seem that anyone wants to enforce them.
    We are starting a divorce but have no visitation agreement I am searching for someone to help me get the police to listen to the law! Please Help I miss my daughter!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Florida
    Posts
    2,773

    Default Re: Child Is Being Held At Fathers And Not Able To See Mother. Is This Child Abducti

    Quote Quoting teachme2u
    View Post
    Ok...my estranged husband took my daughter for brunch with the Easter Bunny on Sun 3/16 with my permission and the understanding that she would be brought back that evening. When she did not show up I called him and was told that she would be back on Wed 3/19. She was not brought back and have not seen her to this date.
    I know where she is and what the Illinois abduction law is but the police will not listen to me. I have copies of the abduction law in illinois but it does not seem that anyone wants to enforce them.
    We are starting a divorce but have no visitation agreement I am searching for someone to help me get the police to listen to the law! Please Help I miss my daughter!
    Is there any custody orders?
    Any court orders at all?

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Posts
    2,031

    Default Re: Child Is Being Held At Fathers And Not Able To See Mother. Is This Child Abducti

    Quote Quoting teachme2u
    View Post
    Ok...my estranged husband took my daughter for brunch with the Easter Bunny on Sun 3/16 with my permission and the understanding that she would be brought back that evening. When she did not show up I called him and was told that she would be back on Wed 3/19. She was not brought back and have not seen her to this date.
    I know where she is and what the Illinois abduction law is but the police will not listen to me. I have copies of the abduction law in illinois but it does not seem that anyone wants to enforce them.
    We are starting a divorce but have no visitation agreement I am searching for someone to help me get the police to listen to the law! Please Help I miss my daughter!
    Why do you think you have more rights to this child than her father? How can you view this as abduction?

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Location
    Michigan
    Posts
    28,906

    Default Re: Child Is Being Held At Fathers And Not Able To See Mother. Is This Child Abducti

    Have your divorce lawyer help you implement a temporary custody and visitation order. Based on what you have said, your ex- is engaging in conduct that judges don't like to see.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Posts
    2,031

    Default Re: Child Is Being Held At Fathers And Not Able To See Mother. Is This Child Abducti

    Quote Quoting aaron
    View Post
    Have your divorce lawyer help you implement a temporary custody and visitation order. Based on what you have said, your ex- is engaging in conduct that judges don't like to see.
    Agreed...But it is not abduction.

  6. #6

    Default Re: Child Is Being Held At Fathers And Not Able To See Mother - Is This Child Abducti

    i can tell u from experience that u have to get a lawyer and file in regards to "habeus corpus". -child being held against will. but since i don't know u i would ask u to take a long hard look at yourself and your lifestyle -is it in the best interest for your child to be with u or the father and secondly does the father not get enough time with the child b/c it would look as if he just wants to be with his daughter. most importantly the best interest of the child should ALWAYS be #1 not necessarily the selfish needs of one parent or the other. my wish would be that u two could sit down and work out a proper visiting schedule to suit both but again i don't know your whole situation and i'm not one to judge just blurting out my opinion.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Location
    Omaha, NE
    Posts
    26

    Default Re: Child Is Being Held At Fathers And Not Able To See Mother - Is This Child Abducti

    Well, from what I see here, the father also lives in Ill like you. I can tell you now though, if he leaves the state without you knowing it with your daughter then that would be abduction/kidnapping. And if he can not come to some sort of visitation agreement with you, yes that will not look so good on the father at court time. If you can not afford to get a lawyer though, you should be able to get some help thru legal aide. I was lucky enough to find a lawyer for my divorce under $1000 just to file and get things started. But I did not go thru legal aide....I found out later about the service, though.

    But in my situation though, my ex wanted the divorce so he paid for my lawyer since he was over seas in the military and could not get one himself. We were separated for awhile before I had to get a lawyer...he was engaged to a woman he met online while he was in Afganistan and after he got back from his deployment, he got her pregnant....before he was divorced and well, before she was even divorced as well. So the divorced had to be taken care of and I for one wanted it done. We have two kids together though and we share joint custody...however, I wish he would take leave time to spend time with his kids. We do not have a normal visitation set up for the moment...currently, he is stationed back overseas and remarried.

    I would like to let him have the kids for the summertime as our oldest is in kindergarten during the school year but he is not updating me on a physical location in this country and plus he claims that he can not transport the kids from the states to this country and then back again so basically, he has his excuses. We may have joint custody with the kids but in the long run, the kids have lived always with me for the longest time and since they have not had much time with their father, that gives me more of the physical custody of the kids.

    Last January 2007. my ex had the kids. We had made an agreement while he was stateside that he could have the kids for just three months...but it was a verbal agreement and nothing was written down. (HINT: anything you do in regards to visitation agreements, make sure if there are any changes, you have a written agreement with your ex...do not do any verbal agreements). My ex took advantage of this and claimed that he did not want to bring the kids back till summertime if that. He was trying to search for anything he possibly can to claim that I was an unfit mother just so that he could keep the kids and I did not much like that. I was also talking to a few of his friends. And they claimed that he had planned this before he had the kids in January and that was why he wanted the kids in the first place. I have not and will not tell the kids what their father did, though.

    All I know is that from this point forth, any agrreements as to any changes in visitations with the kids, I will have signed agreements from my ex and myself. Because you see, even though he had the kids in another state, being that he is in the military, and the kids lived with me for over a year or so, the kids had jurisdiction living in Nebraska than in the other state he was stationed at, Alabama. So I was able to go thru the courts to get the kids back since he was not abiding by our verbal agreement.

    We still share custody today of the kids but I am strongly trying to see of other options since he is being rediculous with other things on my parenting abilities. He has called the CPS on me on countless reasons and I have been evaluated but the CPS dropped the charges since they found nothing wrong. I did talk to my lawyer about other options for custody for the kids but she told me that it would do me no good financially to take this back to court. Now if my ex gets a lawyer though and sets up a court date for changes in custody then I will have to get things started.

    Anyhow, sorry had to spill that info from me. I do not know much about your situation but I hope all works out for the best. In reality, the good thing and right thing is for both parents getting equal rights to their kid(s). Each parent should work together on visitations...maybe you get your daughter for the week and he gets her for the weekends or the other way around. How old is your daughter though? Is she old enough to choose who she wants to stay with the most? Some of this will be talked about in court over custody reasons. Oh, and if you are the type (not saying that you are and all) that would lose it in court if you find that your ex is lying to get custody of her, stay calm and talk it over with your lawyer. The judge will be judging you and your actions to see what kind of person you are....my best friend lost it in court and tryed talking over her ex's lawyer when she found her ex lying in court, the judge did not like that and awarded full custody to the father due to her actions. So, stay calm and remember this is all for your daughter and be strong for her. You know what is true and be strong with that. Be truthful and show that you know what is best for your daughter. Good luck!!!

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