Page 1 of 4 1 2 3 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 38
  1. #1

    Question Why Does The Court System Favor Moms

    I wanted to ask this question separately from my other thread. Why does it seem like the courts are always in favor of mom?... or am I wrong? I only ask this after having discussions with dads who all seem to have the same experience with court. I would think for babies, newborns or toddlers, 50/50 would be ideal because the child already begins a routine (1 week with mom, 1 week with dad) that he/she can get used to and there is not much separation anxiety for the child. Case for DS was filed right after birth and only after a year we still havnt come to a close onthis. Just curious on this.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Posts
    578

    Default Re: Court System

    I wouldn't say the courts are ALWAYS in favor of mom. We're seeing more and more paternal custody. But after you get past all the rationalization, there honestly is simply a long standing cultural bias that sees men as providers and women as caregivers/nurturers as it relates to their young children. The traditional role of men as hunters, soldiers, and women being pregnant, breastfeeding, and being the fairer sex, etc, all plays into into it. More modernly, a lot of it comes from the man often having the higher income - and not many years ago, usually the only income. Things like this don't change overnight, and I doubt you'll ever see paternal rights considered equal for many more generations.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    WV
    Posts
    115

    Default Re: Court System

    It is believed that mom's are better or an assumption of the mom being better because woman are considered the nurting type. The ones who feed and take care of the boo boos and stuff like that. Most mom's do fit that profile but some don't.
    The generation that are judging in these cases think of family life as mom takes care of the children dad works. That was probably the way it was for them. They did not know of a such thing as a single dad. So basically what I'm saying is they do it based on the fact that in thier minds they see moms as the care takers of children not dads.
    Truth is and I'm a woman, that is not always true some woman do have the maternal instinct of a snake and some dads are very maternal like. In receint history dad's had very little to do with the kids if he did it was the dad played with the kid and mom did everything else. Traditional roles have dictated current rulings.
    Good news is that currently more judges are ruling in favor of dad's or 50/50. I see it more now then I ever did but progress is slow as with everything in the judicial branch or any level of gov. I think it would get faster if there werent such things as title IV -E funding where the courts give custody to mom charge dad out the rear for cs and for every $1 the gov collects from dad they get $2 to fund the program to collect cs and the state makes money from the gov. by increasing employment then those employed persons go out into the state and buy things boosting the economy. Nice they are boosting the economy and all but how many children do they have to screw over in the process when in reality dad could very well be the better parent.

  4. #4

    Default Re: Court System

    Quote Quoting babyfat5
    View Post
    It is believed that mom's are better or an assumption of the mom being better because woman are considered the nurting type. The ones who feed and take care of the boo boos and stuff like that. Most mom's do fit that profile but some don't.
    The generation that are judging in these cases think of family life as mom takes care of the children dad works. That was probably the way it was for them. They did not know of a such thing as a single dad. So basically what I'm saying is they do it based on the fact that in thier minds they see moms as the care takers of children not dads.
    Truth is and I'm a woman, that is not always true some woman do have the maternal instinct of a snake and some dads are very maternal like. In receint history dad's had very little to do with the kids if he did it was the dad played with the kid and mom did everything else. Traditional roles have dictated current rulings.
    Good news is that currently more judges are ruling in favor of dad's or 50/50. I see it more now then I ever did but progress is slow as with everything in the judicial branch or any level of gov. I think it would get faster if there werent such things as title IV -E funding where the courts give custody to mom charge dad out the rear for cs and for every $1 the gov collects from dad they get $2 to fund the program to collect cs and the state makes money from the gov. by increasing employment then those employed persons go out into the state and buy things boosting the economy. Nice they are boosting the economy and all but how many children do they have to screw over in the process when in reality dad could very well be the better parent.
    In this case, dad has been rare inthe childs life since birth because of the bad relationship between dad and mom. Dad moved cross country to be with child. Mom has been PCG but has also been hotile and uncommunicative with dad, so dad has not seen the child much during his first year. Now court sees dad as an unemployed absentee father based on the temp order (EOW and CS). Although dad is now working, will dad have any chance at 50/50?

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Posts
    7

    Default Re: Court System

    Quote Quoting 1parent
    View Post
    In this case, dad has been rare inthe childs life since birth because of the bad relationship between dad and mom. Dad moved cross country to be with child. Mom has been PCG but has also been hotile and uncommunicative with dad, so dad has not seen the child much during his first year. Now court sees dad as an unemployed absentee father based on the temp order (EOW and CS). Although dad is now working, will dad have any chance at 50/50?
    Nope, not likely AT ALL.

    And honestly? Has nothing to do with a bias towards Mothers. There is a 'bias' towards the custodial parent remaining so. Dad and Mom were apparently not married, which means as soon as Jr took his first breath and kept on breathing, she was the ONLY parent the child had and therefore the custodial parent.

    Changing custody is VERY difficult. If Dad wanted an even shot, he should have had a baby with a woman he was married to.

    And frankly? He shouldn't let mom's 'hostility' keep him from his child. THAT is his CHOICE and one he'll have to live with.

  6. #6

    Default Re: Court System

    Quote Quoting cjanerun
    View Post
    Nope, not likely AT ALL.

    And honestly? Has nothing to do with a bias towards Mothers. There is a 'bias' towards the custodial parent remaining so. Dad and Mom were apparently not married, which means as soon as Jr took his first breath and kept on breathing, she was the ONLY parent the child had and therefore the custodial parent.

    Changing custody is VERY difficult. If Dad wanted an even shot, he should have had a baby with a woman he was married to.

    And frankly? He shouldn't let mom's 'hostility' keep him from his child. THAT is his CHOICE and one he'll have to live with.
    Its only been 1 year in the childs life and that is enough time to let mom retain physical custody? Can this every grow into a 50/50 split? and if so, how soon?

    Mom's hostility hasnt kept dad from the child. Mom always has child ready on time for pickup, but mom and dad never discuss any details with each other about the child. Both Mom and Dad are mad at each other for various reasons and cant and dont seem to want to communicate. It seems that mom and dad were cordial at one point briefly but not so anymore after they couldnt agree on visitation schedule. Dad wants more extended periods of time with baby outside EOW and holidays (dad wants all of June and all of August until school), and mom doesnt at this time because child is not school age. Mom has constantly told dad not to bring anyone else to home during exchange and dad refuses. Mom does not give dad any supplies for visitation. Dad gives mom money sporadically despite the ordered CS due date.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    WV
    Posts
    115

    Default Re: Court System

    I just don't see a 50/50 here due to the fact dad has not been there always. Yes maybe some day a 50/50 but the court like to stay with consistancy for the child sake. It is what the child is use to. The lack of communiction is going to be a problem as well maybe first try to communicate through email? Set up a weekly email day and do all your discussion by that. It is not in the best intrest of the child if you can't communicate with the other party. You still have to co parent.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Posts
    7

    Default Re: Court System

    Quote Quoting 1parent
    View Post
    Its only been 1 year in the childs life and that is enough time to let mom retain physical custody? Can this every grow into a 50/50 split? and if so, how soon?
    Sure, maybe someday. But for a child 1yr old... when the Father (as YOU SAID) has been largely absent? Not so much.

    Mom's hostility hasnt kept dad from the child.
    Really? Because YOU SAID "dad has been rare inthe childs life since birth because of the bad relationship between dad and mom" and "Mom has been PCG but has also been hotile and uncommunicative with dad, so dad has not seen the child much during his first year"

    Dad wants more extended periods of time with baby outside EOW and holidays (dad wants all of June and all of August until school), and mom doesnt at this time because child is not school age.
    It is exceedingly unlikely that the Father will receive such extended blocks of time w/an infant or toddler when (as you said) he's been absent. It would be unlikely if he'd been there EVERY DAY. That is simply too long for a child to go w/out seeing the other parent. No matter WHAT gender the other parent is.

    Mom has constantly told dad not to bring anyone else to home during exchange and dad refuses.
    Then Dad should stop being an ass.

    Mom does not give dad any supplies for visitation.
    Then mom should stop being an ass AND dad should have supplies of his own.

    Dad gives mom money sporadically despite the ordered CS due date.
    Then Dad should stop being an ass.

  9. #9

    Default Re: Update

    Hello, this is sort of an update. since the temp order ing Jan, dad has visited child every scheduled visit (EOW) and has paid all of CS to date. they were support go back to merit heraing in May but it was continued to sept so that mediation could occur. so dad is still on EOW schedule. Before dad was not working, but as of may, dad has a full time job with benefits. does this show the court that dad is an involved father and increases dad's chances of getting 50/50. Unfortunately, mom and dad do not speak whatsoever. they dont get along. they just exchange child and keep goiing.

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Location
    Michigan
    Posts
    28,906

    1. Sponsored Links
       

Page 1 of 4 1 2 3 ... LastLast

Similar Threads

  1. Sanctions: Harassing Through the Court System
    By ProveInnocense in forum Civil Procedure
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 06-07-2011, 10:36 AM
  2. Pretrial Procedure: Court in 2 Days But Citation Is Not Yet In the Court System
    By judoant in forum Criminal Procedure
    Replies: 8
    Last Post: 09-29-2010, 06:50 AM
  3. Expungement and Sealing: Are Arrest and Court Records Sealed Upon Termination in the Favor of the Defendant
    By hippo3 in forum Criminal Records
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 02-10-2010, 04:22 PM
  4. Is the court system just?
    By ohiogirl21 in forum Debate the Issues
    Replies: 8
    Last Post: 08-12-2006, 12:54 PM
  5. I'm The Better Parent, But Courts Favor Moms
    By Hamish in forum Child Custody, Support and Visitation
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: 01-26-2006, 03:54 AM
 
 
Sponsored Links

Legal Help, Information and Resources