Sorry, but it's been "one of those days", and I need to rant...
For everyone who is thinking of posting along the lines of "but I didn't want the cops to arrest"....
Here's EXACTLY why they do:
Just today in LA, 2 SWAT officers shot, 1 killed, responding to a DV call (the perp is dead too) where the bodies of 3 family members were found, and the wife/girlfriend (police aren't saying which yet) was able to escape
And again today in Kentucky, a husband shot and stabed his wife at her job at a school, witnessed by many 11 year old students.
Neither of these incidents was a "first time" for violent conflict. We don't have the whole story yet, but you can count on it.
Last year, in Florida alone, just over 800 deaths thanks to domestic violence. The majority of them didn't think it would happen to them either. Some 80% of those who call 911 during a domestic don't want to press charges - thankfully, what they want doesn't matter and arrest is likely anyway. At least for THAT day, those officers won't be responding to a call to collect another body and have to notify another family. By the time it gets to court, some 90-95% want to drop charges. I even talked to a woman once (her perp broke both of her legs) who wanted him back because...are you ready for this....she didn't want to loose her new couch and she was sure he'd get it in the divorce. (Do they even HAVE couches in heaven?)
Then, of course, there's the whole issue of the officers themselves. Other than traffic stops and traffic crashes, responding to a domestic violence call is the #3 cause of death for officers in the line of duty. Dispatchers are going to dispatch ANY call where there's even the SMELL of a domestic arguement as a priority call, and officers are going to respond accordingly.
If you are in an abusive relationship, get help for yourself. Get help for your kids. You CAN'T get help for an abuser - either they want it and pursue it or they don't - YOU can't fix or change someone else, and a court-ordered program isn't going to work miracles, unless they WANT it (and if they wanted it, would a court have to ORDER them to go?)
Work on your safety plan. Talk to your kids about it. Talk to anyone who is in a position to help keep you safe and watch your back.
If you don't already have the number for your local crisis center in your cell phone, PUT IT IN. You can even give it a "fake" name. You should also have an entry on your cell phone called "I C E" - in case of emergency. If police need to contact your family or next of kin, that's one place they will look for contact information. Make sure your kid's cell phones have these entries too in case something happens to your kids and police need to contact you, or grandma, or whoever.