State: Louisiana
I am 30 weeks pregnant and due in early April. I am considering leaving my boyfriend who is my baby's biological father. (A DNA test has been done via chorionic villus testing.) I am in need of some advice to help me make the best of a bad situation that I have created.
Issue:
1. Boyfriend has lived with me for 4 months. I was unemployed for 2 of the 4 months and have since manged to find 2 part-time jobs to pay the bills. He however has remained unemployed until this past week when he took a minimum-wage job.
2. Before losing my job, I placed myself in financial peril by paying $4500 in legal costs (bail & attorney fees) for him. In November he went before a judge who is requiring him to finish his GED by his next court date in February. In addition he is to continue participating in anger management classes and the judge wants to see us continue taking parenting classes together in prepartion for our daughter's birth. In the 2 1/2 months time the judge has given him to do these things, he has gone to 2 anger management classes, has not worked on his schooling and has expected me to schedule parenting classes for us.
3. I have reached my limit of tolerance and am now at my boiling point. I have lost any respect I had for my boyfriend as he has made no serious attempt to be a responsible partner. I am willing to take care of one child on my own, but I am not willing to take care of our daughter AND him.
My options as they appear to me:
A) Kick him out on his butt and let him fend for himself but be completely alone for the remainder of my pregnancy (I have no family in the state and what family I do have refuse to participate in my daughter's life because of who the father is.)
B) Continue living together and hope things get better. (Looking at his track record this isn't a very optomistic option)
Problems I am anticipating:
A) He will want shared custody but has done nothing to help support me during this pregnancy. I have supported him! His mother has frequently bought food for us and I'm afraid that he might use this as a way to claim that he has supported me during the pregnancy. (She would perjur herself I believe if asked about it in court if she thought it would help him.)
B) He used to smoke marijuana but has managed to stay away from it due to his upcoming court case. He has informed me that he wants to begin smoking again recreationally and that he wants to do this soon. I believe that he will do this once he feels that he is free from the court system.
C) If I break up with him, I will never be reimbursed by him for the $4500 which has nearly cost me my home, let alone ever see any child support. Any true support I would get would come from his mother, not him.
Does anyone have any legal (or even parental) advice they can give me? I know I have created a difficult situation, but I want to do what is right to make this bad situation better. Although I have considered adoption (giving birth in Utah and adopting out from there due to Utah's adoption-friendly laws), I have decided that adoption is not an option for me personally. If I thought my boyfriend would change and become a responsible partner and father, I'd be willing to tough it out. Unfortunately he would rather let others take care of him and I just don't have it in me to take care of a grown man any longer.

