What Are My Rights As The Mother of an Unborn Child

[moburkes]

She can't put his name on the BC. Only he can get his name put on the BC, by signing the paperwork, or by going through the court system. An unmarried mother doesn't have the option to have his name on there, even if she wanted to.

Also, breastfeeding will not be an excuse for custody or visitation. Have you heard of a breastpump?

[jk]

Also, breastfeeding will not be an excuse for custody or visitation. Have you heard of a breastpump?

You should know there is more to it than that Mo. There is a bonding with breastfeeding that cannot be replaced. I would hope a court would see it as more than simply a feeding.

I can tell you a close friend of mine was given only 6 hours on Sat and 6 hours on Sunday for visitation (no overnight) with his very young son for this exact reason.

[moburkes]

I breastfed both of my children. And, I also pumped. And, many people use formula. Your friend got a nice judge.

[Lovingmommy84]

I am just doing what I think is best for my baby. If he takes me to court to see her then I will have to let him but if he doesn't take me then I have no obligation to let him. I think it would be in my daughters best interest if he is not around her. He smokes, his house is not clean, he is drug user, and an alcoholic. And once she is older I know he will be saying things to her about me. I on the other hand would not do that to him, I just wouldn't talk about him. In the future I'm sure he will just stop coming around and I think that will be harmful to my daughter as well. If he is not around to begin with, she can't get hurt.

[Lovingmommy84]

Yes, I have heard of a breast pump. My second child never took a bottle no matter how hard I tried, and his father tried...and I also agree with the bonding invlved with breastfeeding. My son and I are extremely close. He nursed for 21 months. He started eating solids at 9 months(though I had tried to give them to him from about 5 months on) but still nursed throughout the night and day. After his father and I split up when he was about 9 months old he would come over to see him, and take him for a couple of hours but he was a decent guy and out of consideration for his child he wouldn't try to take him away longer. If this person were as decent as him, I wouldn't be having any problem with him.

About the birth certificate, yes, he would have to be at the hospital to sign it and I do not want him there. I will inform him of her birth when I get home.

[panther10758]

You seem to have a history of having children and keeping them from thier Fathers. This isnt about what you want its about what is best for the child. Most judges will want the child to have a relationship with both parents even if its just supervised. Children who have relationships with both parents tend to have fewer behavior problems.

[moburkes]

You seem to have a history of having children and keeping them from thier Fathers. This isnt about what you want its about what is best for the child. Most judges will want the child to have a relationship with thier children even if its just supervised. Children who have relationships with both parents tend to have fewer behavior problems.

I like your style.

[Xena]

He smokes, his house is not clean, he is a drug user, and an alcoholic.

Did those behaviors begin only after you became pregnant?

I ask because if they didn't, you might have a hard time convincing a court that he will be a bad influence. The reason is that you concieved a child with him in spite of his behaviors, plus you didn't maind having your other 2 children around him in spite of his behaviors.

[Lovingmommy84]

I do not have a history of having children and keeping them from their father's, thank you very much. I was with the father of my first son for many years, we had a good relationship, and it just didn't work out. We have settled everything outside of court, and still have a good relationship. I even get along with his girlfriend and although I make all the desisions involving him, I still include them. With my second son I was with his father for a few years. He started to get abusive...he had a certain way of thinking(The world is bad, we should all just die instead of live here, etc...). My son had an ear infection and I gave him the prescribed antibiotics without telling him, and I got beat for it bc antibiotics are "bad." A few months later he did something else and went to jail bc of it. But I already explained that he still feels strongly about me being a mother to not only his son, but the one I had before and still takes care of us. This too, was all settled outside of court, and was his idea. This time...as I already explained, I was unaware of his behaviors, remember I said he hid it from knowing I would not have started dating him if I had known. I feel very strongly about keeping my children away from smoking, drinking, drugs, etc...we do not visit any of my family that smokes, and I am related to a couple of alcoholics and we avoid them too. I do not want my children in that sort of enviroment. I don't drink, smoke, and I've never done drugs. We never really went to his house much either. He came to mine. He had friends that moved in with him after we started dating that smoked(pot) all day and he would come to my house so I wouldn't go there and know what was going on. When I learned of his alcohol/drug use that is when things started ending between us, unfortunately I was already pregnant though unaware at that time. I am trying to explain everything in as much detail I can, so please try to follow.

[Lovingmommy84]

Also...my second son, who has not seen his father in over a year, is a very well behaved child, and I think that if he were around his father he would have more issues. His father knows this as well, and that is why he hasn't tried to get visitation. He has visitation rights and has never asked to see him. He pays for him but is staying away to protect him. He has done many wrong things but he is still a decent enough guy to put the child first. This guy is only mad because his daighter will not have his last name. Yes, he has literally said this. He told me if she had his last name he would do anything I asked and give me anything I asked for. But if I give her my last name he will take me to court and do everythign he can to hurt me by getting her as much as he can. Those are his words. Sounds real mature and great person, doesn't he?