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  1. #1
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    Default Does A Mother Have To Inform The Father of Paternity, in Florida

    My 31 year old daughter in Florida is 4 months pregnant from a brief relationship with the father and has not informed him of her pregnancy. She isn't interested in pursuing any further relationship with this man. What are her legal responsibilities?

  2. #2
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    Default Re: Does A Mother Have To Inform The Father of Paternity, in Florida

    She doesn't have to do anything. He is entitled to bring a paternity action to seek visitation or custody, and if he does so he can reasonably expect to be ordered to pay child support.

  3. #3
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    Default Re: Does A Mother Have To Inform The Father of Paternity, in Florida

    Quote Quoting worriedgmom
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    My 31 year old daughter in Florida is 4 months pregnant from a brief relationship with the father and has not informed him of her pregnancy. She isn't interested in pursuing any further relationship with this man. What are her legal responsibilities?
    Unfortunately she doesn't have any LEGAL responsibility to notify the father, unless she needs to EVER apply for public assistance.

    I normally try to stick to only the legal end of things, but this time I'm going to bring up the moral end. Your daughter will be doing a great injustice to her child by not informing the father, which will prevent her child from ever knowing his/her real father. That's in addition to the very possible need to know the child's full medical background. God forbid, but what if your grandchild were to become ill with a genetic disease? How would your daughter ever be able to find out what she would need to know to help her child?
    Personally, I believe every mother should inform the father, even though the law doesn't require them to.

  4. #4

    Default Re: Does A Mother Have To Inform The Father of Paternity, in Florida

    I understand the moral reason to inform the father but it also brings up many emotional issues that a child might have to deal with like what if the father is a jerk and doesn't call enough or isn't enough involved.. or what if he is overly involved and wants more and more than he's entitled to? both situations put a strain on the sitation more than needed. This is already a tough emotional situation and unfortunately since the women are the womb's we usually have to carry the burden of trying to do the right thing in either involving or not involving the father. I guess that wasn't much help but maybe it makes understanding why the girl doesn't want to tell the father a little more understandable. by the way my husband is adopted so we've never know his medical history and yes that's been a concern but I don't know my grandmothers medical history much better or my mothers and I know them. ?

  5. #5
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    Default Re: Does A Mother Have To Inform The Father of Paternity, in Florida

    Quote Quoting Shellyh79606
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    I understand the moral reason to inform the father but it also brings up many emotional issues that a child might have to deal with like what if the father is a jerk and doesn't call enough or isn't enough involved.. or what if he is overly involved and wants more and more than he's entitled to? both situations put a strain on the sitation more than needed. This is already a tough emotional situation and unfortunately since the women are the womb's we usually have to carry the burden of trying to do the right thing in either involving or not involving the father. I guess that wasn't much help but maybe it makes understanding why the girl doesn't want to tell the father a little more understandable. by the way my husband is adopted so we've never know his medical history and yes that's been a concern but I don't know my grandmothers medical history much better or my mothers and I know them. ?
    The only thing I will add is that if your daughter decides in the future to notify the father, she will NOT be able to get any retroactive CS in Florida. That;s one of the few things that this state does right- if a mother deliberately delays telling the father or establishing paternity, she is not entitled to any retro support. This is based on the FACT that a father can never get lost time and visits made up for. This is something your daughter needs to consider in making her decision.

  6. #6
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    Default Re: Does A Mother Have To Inform The Father of Paternity, in Florida

    I'm sorry, this just bothers me. You got the legal answer... but this is just.. I don't know.

    Quote Quoting Shellyh79606
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    I understand the moral reason to inform the father but it also brings up many emotional issues that a child might have to deal with like what if the father is a jerk and doesn't call enough or isn't enough involved..

    Then your daughter should have thought about that before she laid down and made a baby with him instead of worrying about her genitals tingling.

    or what if he is overly involved and wants more and more than he's entitled to?

    Entitled to??? IT'S HIS CHILD FOR GOD'S SAKE. Is there a such thing as your daughter being overly involved. It's cases like these where even if dad was going to try and be a stand up guy, he could do nothing right. What do you mean more than he's entitled to? If he established paternity and (hopefully) gains joint custody of the child, he's just as entitled as your daughter to make decisions regarding that child.

    both situations put a strain on the sitation more than needed. This is already a tough emotional situation and unfortunately since the women are the womb's we usually have to carry the burden of trying to do the right thing in either involving or not involving the father.

    No, you should carry the burden of choosing the father of your child WISELY prior to becoming pregnant. After that... you learn to live with the decisions you make. The courts tend to make sure (again if he exercises his rights) to make sure of whether or not he's involved and to what extent.

    I guess that wasn't much help but maybe it makes understanding why the girl doesn't want to tell the father a little more understandable.

    Not in the least. It helps you make yourself feel better for encouraging your daughter in making a BAD decision. One after another it seems.

    by the way my husband is adopted so we've never know his medical history and yes that's been a concern but I don't know my grandmothers medical history much better or my mothers and I know them. ?
    Rationalizing wrong is just azz backwards to me. Your future grandchild is not (presumably) going to be adopted and your husband (hopefully) had the privilege of 2 parents. The simple fact of the matter is that that child should have the benefit of both parents and it seems like both of them have a little problem with decision making skills, so why is one better than the other except for the fact that one of them has you as parents -- and you seem to see that as a plus. Let the father decide to what extent his contact will be with the child, then if in the negative, let your daughter deal with it through the courts, but don't encourage your daughter to automatically cut this man out of this child's life because "she" doesn't like him that much anymore.

  7. #7

    Default Re: Does A Mother Have To Inform The Father of Paternity, in Florida

    I was speaking from my experience with a father that's not involved enough with my disabled daughter based on her disability who I have had to pester and pester to visit her. and from watching a friend of mine have to deal with a father who was using the fact he was a father to control the mother and every decisions she made in regard to a child that wasn't even being considered by him as a person just something he could use against the mother. I appreciate that you thought you knew what I was talking about but It wasn't what I was trying to convey. I was trying to convey that a mother no matter what age, no matter what the situation is, is always the person that has to make the tough decisions about what's best for the child because the father isn't always involved or uses the child as a weapon. I can UNDERSTAND was what I said how the mother would be apprehensive about the situation if she thought she was doing what was best for her child. None of us can speak to what is best for each and every individual child unless we know of EVERY situation and person involved. I just was offering some understanding from my personal experience with life.

  8. #8
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    Default Re: Does A Mother Have To Inform The Father of Paternity, in Florida

    Quote Quoting Shellyh79606
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    I was speaking from my experience with a father that's not involved enough with my disabled daughter based on her disability who I have had to pester and pester to visit her. and from watching a friend of mine have to deal with a father who was using the fact he was a father to control the mother and every decisions she made in regard to a child that wasn't even being considered by him as a person just something he could use against the mother. I appreciate that you thought you knew what I was talking about but It wasn't what I was trying to convey. I was trying to convey that a mother no matter what age, no matter what the situation is, is always the person that has to make the tough decisions about what's best for the child because the father isn't always involved or uses the child as a weapon. I can UNDERSTAND was what I said how the mother would be apprehensive about the situation if she thought she was doing what was best for her child. None of us can speak to what is best for each and every individual child unless we know of EVERY situation and person involved. I just was offering some understanding from my personal experience with life.
    And you know what? I'm speaking from experience also. I have a 12 year old that hasn't seen nor heard from his father in 10 years (and that last contact was for 10 minutes max), HOWEVER, knowing that he was irresponsible when I made the decision to lay down some 13 years ago, I STILL wouldn't deny him the right to know that that child existed or stop him from eventually (if he chose to) establish a relationship with his son. Yes, I have had to be responsible for this child's every move and expense since the day he came on this earth, but I knew the job was dangerous when I took it. Does it change the fact that that man has the RIGHT to his child??? Not at all. Not every father uses his child as a weapon, yes, there are ones that do... but women are NOTORIOUS for doing it too (and I say that as a woman).

    No, we can't speak for every situation at every time, but the OP has not said anything regarding the father of this soon to be child being abusive to or destructive, simply that her daughter no longer wants to pursue a relationship with him. It's like quitting a job to her I guess. Nevertheless, I absolutely hope that this father will exercise his right to be involved with his child, because after she procreates, it's not about what she wants anymore (selfishness does not a good parent make), it's about what's best for the child, and what's best for the child is having the benefit and access to both parents barring the father isn't a beast.

  9. #9

    Default Re: Does A Mother Have To Inform The Father of Paternity, in Florida

    I appreciate that position and I agree that a father should to the best of someone's ability be notified and it isn't a mother's decision to keep this information about a pregnancy to herself however I can see how someone would feel compelled to that was all I was saying. There are bad and good in each situation and I appreciate your position and the struggles you have had with a not so great dad. I am not in a position to judge anyone here based on what they do or don't do just was offering some understanding of what some women choose to do based on their specific situation. It was not my intention to start a moral debate about whether to notify or not and am sorry for that. I am a christian and have my own demons to battle and would never presume to tell someone what they should or shouldn't do morally based on my personal beliefs. I will retire from this discussion now since it left the legal long ago.

  10. #10
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    Default Re: Does A Mother Have To Inform The Father of Paternity, in Florida

    I appreciate all the responses. Thank all of you. Please be assured that if left up to me the father will be told. I am heartsick about the circumstances. I just hope my daughter heeds the advice her father and I have given her but ultimately it is her decision.

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