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  1. #1

    Default Changing My Son's Name Or Getting Step-Parent Adoption

    Hi. I currently have been with my fiance since 2001. We have three children together (one my own) and plan on getting married next year 2008. My son's father has been in and out of his life since he was born. He has gone to seeing him a few times a year to seeing him once every couple years, etc. My son turns 11 this Thursday. I have been to court to try and remove vistitations rights I gave his father back in 98, but the court keeps giving in to him. Also, my soon to be husband has been his only father figure since we have been together; mind you; me and my sons father were together three years. (year two we had our son, year three i left) The court seems to keep giving his father chance after chance. I dont get it. If I left my child I would be a bad mother and they would say I abandoned my son; he would have all rights. I have had soul custody of him since 98 and it feels like I don't. He is an unfit parent, and is never there for his son. Why are they giving him so much right to our child?

    Basically, I wanna know what it takes to allow my soon to be husband to adopt my son, and change his name to our family name without having to go through his biological father. His father refuses to give up any visitation or allow for a name change/adoption even though he is never there. The last ttime he seen his son was three years ago, the time before that maybe a year. Now after not hearing from him in so long he calls up the other day to see our son and has more stories than mother goose why he hasn't been around. This is killing me and my husband, and our son! This whole ordeal has upset me greatly for years, and I simply cannot deal with this anymore. please help.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
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    Behind a Desk
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    98,846

    Default Re: Changing my sons name/adoption

    Your son's father has been recently involved in his life, and he has visitation rights, and is apparently paying support. Although laws are different in each state and I don't see that you followed the instruction to identify yours, I don't know of any state in which you are not going to be able to involuntarily terminate his parental rights under these facts. You can attempt to seek a name change by trying to persuade the court overseeing your custody case that it is in the child's best interest. Your ex- can oppose that motion.

  3. #3

    Default Re: Changing My Son's Name Or Getting Step-Parent Adoption

    Thats the problem. He has not been inlvoved in his life. Just in the last few weeks he has been calling, but there has been no contact, not to mention the last time he has seen him was last year. This goes on every year. He see's him once a year if my son is lucky.

    When it comes to child support he is suppose to pay, but I fuse to keep running to court to place violation petitions against him. I havent received child support since August. Regarding that whole issue, I really rather not get it. Anything to stay away from him makes our lives easier.

    It is so aggravating. He is not in my childs life, he does not pay child support and yet we have to get his approval for what is best for my child?

    What about the deed poll, or perhaps; I dont know if this rumor is true, but when my son turns 12 he can have his name changed?

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    Behind a Desk
    Posts
    98,846

    Default Re: Changing My Son's Name Or Getting Step-Parent Adoption

    When your son turns 18, he can change his own name.

  5. #5

    Default Re: Changing My Son's Name Or Getting Step-Parent Adoption

    What do I do about my soon-to-be husband adopting my son?

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Location
    Michigan
    Posts
    28,906

    Default Re: Changing My Son's Name Or Getting Step-Parent Adoption

    Try to get bio dad to consent.

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