Quote Quoting nina1074
1. Where do I file for divorce? I haven't lived in NC long enough to establish residency and I lived in IL for thiry years prior to moving.
It would likely be best to litigate the divorce in the state where the minor child is domiciled.

Quote Quoting nina1074
2. Should I remain in NC until the divorce is final or is it acceptable for me to move back home?
You can move home if you choose; but the location of the child's domicile may affect your decision.

Quote Quoting nina1074
3. Since technically I am leaving our residence (granted I lived there only forty days) and the state, will it be considered abandonment on my part?
Abandonment of whom? The husband who asked you not to come home (where the other woman now presumably resides)? Or of the child?