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  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Posts
    2

    Angry Guardianship for an Elderly Parent

    hello An attorney convinced my Dad that I, the daughter, should be the one to request the court to be my Mom's "legal guardian" instead of Dad.

    My Mom, age 80, is in the late stages of alzheimers and lives with my Dad. I live with my own family about 25 minutes away. Although a few minutes away, I have been involved with my Mom's care for about 5 years now. i.e. Applying for medicaid, constant contact with the 24-hour care aides, going to each dr appt with her, making sure she has everything she needs and that she is living the last years of her life in comfort and peace.

    This sudden appointment with an attorney was thrown at me by my Dad. No chance to research and have questions ready for the attorney. This was my Dad's 2nd appt with this attorney. It was my first. After this appt, my Dad handed him a check of $2250 and my Dad is supposed to bring the other half next week when i am supposed to sign some papers to request the court for me to become Mom's legal guardian.

    This attorney seemed to be rushing Dad to get him his fee. This should have been a red flag to me!! Now i am finding out online that the attorney cannot file this application til I have taken a legal guardian training (new york). The attorney did not mention that the application cannot be filed til the training is done... so why is he asking for the $ in full now? Can he do that?

    I also find out that I may have to report to the court everything I do with my Mom's $ once i become a legal guardian. The attorney DID NOT mention this at all. I have nothing to hide but for me to spend time, energy and even more of her $ or even get compensated for this is just a waste of time! She just gets about $700 monthly from Social Security and it is electronically deposited into a savings acct which has my name and hers. My Mom set this acct way before she got ill. Before she got ill, every month she would call me to tell me how much she wanted me to withdraw for her. No hassle for her to take a bus to the bank.

    Now that my Mom is ill... things are still just fine the way it is! I keep receipts for everything I buy for her. But now for some reason, someone convinced Dad that a legal guardian must be assigned so he won't lose a piece of property that has my Mom's and his name on it. I explained to my Dad, that based on what I have read so far, if my Mom dies, he does not lose any part of the property, it then belongs all to him. He really doesn't need the $ right now. I am upset that the attorney did not tell my Dad what all his options are. He can leave everything alone if he doesn't really need the $ from the sale of the property. I, myself, am not interested in one cent. My husband and I are well financially.

    I feel so stressed about all this. I feel like the attorney has taken advantage of Dad. I am to meet again with the attorney next week and will respectfully confront him with my feelings, doubts and questions!

    I want to do the right thing here. I already shared my thoughts with my Dad. The only consolation is that he may have lost that $2250 instead of double that or more. I hope I made sense here. Any advice? Am i overreacting? What should i do? Is a legal guardian really necessary, even if my Dad is still alive and can handle any medical or financial matters for Mom?

    Thank you for your time. Any comments would be appreciated and fast.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Posts
    2

    Angry Re: Guardianship for an Elderly Parent

    No one has any comments, advice, support?

    I am a nervous wreck. Why wasn't this lawyer upfront with all the facts?
    Ignorance? Greedy? Sneaky? or am I just confused?

    Seeing that lawyer later on today. We shall see what he has to say and then move on.
    Life is too short.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    Behind a Desk
    Posts
    98,846

    Default Re: Guardianship for an Elderly Parent

    I suspect that your father is being overcharged for the amount of work involved. If your mother's only income is Social Security, and there are no other assets in her name that somebody needs to manage, having somebody designated her alternate payee by the Social Security Administration should take care of things with minimal fuss and expense.

    I suggest consulting independent counsel (i.e., a lawyer of your own), as we may not have a full understanding of your situation or what this lawyer intends to accomplish.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Bikini Atoll
    Posts
    163

    Default Re: Guardianship for an Elderly Parent

    $2250.00 is NOT an unreasonable amount. Courts typically allow time for the appointed guardian to take the guardianship class.
    I have been involved with my Mom's care for about 5 years now. i.e. Applying for medicaid...
    How does one sign the application for Medicaid without proper authorization to do so?

  5. #5

    Default Re: Guardianship for an Elderly Parent

    2250 is not unreasonable but 5500 is. If she is on Medicaid NY will attach her portion of the property. There are certain exclusions but you being guardian has nothing to do with it. You need to consult a certified elder law attorney. There is a list on the NAELA site.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Bikini Atoll
    Posts
    163

    Default Re: Guardianship for an Elderly Parent

    Quote Quoting lwpat
    View Post
    2250 is not unreasonable but 5500 is.
    Of course, that amount depends on how much per hour an attorney charges. I did misread that the $2250 was only half. It was such a long post.

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