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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar 2020

    Default How Do I Get My Aunt the Intensive Medical Care She Needs, Get Her Back Behind Bars

    My question involves a person located in the state of: Virgina

    That question might be worded in a strange way, but please take a moment to read this description:

    My aunt has clear mental illness, and needs to be declared disabled. She exhibits addictions, paranoid, and manic episodes just to name a few. She has been in and out of drugs her whole life. She also has a huge problem with authority. She has been on probation countless times, and been charged with attempted murder and has been incarcerated for almost two years. She can be very devious and threatening as well. My aunt is married, and though her husband is hard-working and supporting of my aunt, he doesn't allow her to stay at his house right now. So, she has no where to stay but my grandmother's house. She's also unemployment, so she and my grandmother constantly clash day in and day out.

    Right now, she is living with my grandmother, who is unfit to live on her own. My grandmother has many health problems, suffers from dementia, can't remember when she has or has not taken her multitude of medications, can't drive, etc. The two of them and the states they are in are not a good combination.

    My grandmother does better when she lives alone because my mom goes above and beyond keeping track of her medications, running to the store for her, cleaning her cpap machine for her, driving her to her countless appointments, etc. My mom does all this while trying to maintain her own household and still work her job she's held for almost 40 years. She is running herself ragged.

    There is no one else on this side of my family that can help my grandmother and aunt, and it is making my mother deteriorate right before my eyes and I can't take it any longer. I help when I can, but I'm very busy myself working OT and live further away.

    My aunt has been recently kicked out of a detox center because she had several run ins with the staff there. She is currently on probation. She has made several verbal threats to my grandmother within the last couple weeks to my grandmother. My grandmother says she was walking around the house all day recently with a knife in her hand for no apparent reason other than to come off threatening. This past weekend, she called my mother warning her she found a gun of my grandfather's, and though I don't know if the connotations were to be of a joking tone or serious, told my mom she should probably come get the gun from her because she "shouldn't be near a gun right now."

    My aunt has been at a mental rehab facility in a hospital for a day now, and they will most likely release her tomorrow morning because they won't have enough sample size to witness her true volatility and erratic, dangerous behavior. She will most likely go back to my grandmother's, and continue this volatile situation that is bound to turn uglier with each passing day. My aunt seems to not be herself and is maintaining worrisome behavior constantly, moreso now than I have personally seen in my life time.

    My mom is taking off work and spending all of her waking hours taking care of my aunt and grandmother right now. Our plan is to get my aunt into a long term mental health facility, and within the next few months, get my grandmother into an assisted living facility.

    However, what needs to happen first, is my aunt needs to get into a rehab center, or incarcerated. The last time she was locked up, she came out a seemingly new person for almost two years. She helped my grandmother and the house with some chores, yardwork, and her meds, easing the care burden on my mother.

    That is a lot of backstory, and it brings me to my main question: what can we do to get my aunt into a long term, intensive mental care facility (one she won't get kicked out of or leave on her own) or back behind bars? The law enforcement officer my mother has talked to says the authorities can't do anything to apprehend my aunt unless they see her do something physically threatening to someone. I'm not an expert in this field, but I find this to be an insufficient and only partially true answer. Police have responded to calls a few times within the last couple weeks to keep the peace, but nothing more. Is there any legal recourse my mother and I have in getting her in long term rehab or getting locked up?

    Thank you for your time. These circumstances are destroying my mother, and she is at a point now where I'm seeing her age one year for every one week that passes, and I can no longer sit on the sidelines without maybe asking some questions that she might not be asking. I fear she will end up with a fried brain and dementia like my grandmother's very, very soon if I don't step in and play a larger role in this.

    Please, any and all counsel is appreciated.

    Thank you.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2014

    Default Re: How Do I Get My Aunt the Intensive Medical Care She Needs, Get Her Back Behind Ba

    Your aunt has to commit a crime before she can be arrested. Even if this were to happen they will set bail. They can order her into a mental health facility for an evaluation. But that usually only takes a few days or less. If the facility finds she is a danger to herself and/ or others. They can keep her until they think she is no longer a danger.

    You need to keep in mind the problems you and your family see in your aunt may or may not be severe enough to require long term hospitalization. Have you or other family members gone to court to try and have her declared mentally incompetent? Keep in mind if a court were to order her to have a,evaluation. Unless they find she is a danger to herself or others. They cannot keep her against her will.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jan 2011

    Default Re: How Do I Get My Aunt the Intensive Medical Care She Needs, Get Her Back Behind Ba

    Does your mom have medical and financial POA's for her mother? If not then those need to be done before your grandmother's mental condition deteriorates past the point where she can no longer make decisions.

    I would focus on getting Grandma into a memory-care facility ASAP. Once that is done then her house can be sold to pay for her care, and the nutso aunt evicted if needed.

    The threats, access to a firearm, etc. can be reported to your aunt's probation officer. If she violates her probation she can end up back in jail.

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