My question involves child abuse or neglect in the State of: Texas

When I was 14, IN OREGON 2017 cps finally took a look at my case, 17+ calls about child abuse neglect, drinking, parties all that. My mother did a lot of messed up things, but Her brain doesn't work like everyone else,( Adhd, Bi polar, Extreme PTSD, fetal drug syndrome) all un medicated, well not properly anyways, she should have never been able to "raise" kids. My brother left the house from all the emotional, mental, and sometimes physical abuse, he was 16 the first time. But moving on, my mother freaked out and sent me down to Texas to stay wit some people for a few months while she figured stuff out. Before I left the lady said they were defiantly taking me away from my mother, but since I left state....they couldn't do anything. After 4 months my mother came down promising a whole new life (like always) but nothing changed, I got a job so we could get the house, her "Family" we were staying with were getting pissed off by her. Eventually we got a place, I helped pay for. My mother quite the job because she didn't like the people and I was forced to by her. My mother didn't have a job that lasted more then a month for almost a year, and then finally she had no job at all. No money, barely any food. Shes just doing drugs and drinking and yelling at me. I started doing somethings to myself that weren't good. anyways. Lets go back to 5 months ago, Me and my mother were super bad, she started hitting me, screaming even more over nothing, drugs constant, stealing my meds, not getting out of bed. Somehow by the grace of god, she sent me to the people I lived with before. And I refused to come back home. It was still summer so it was okay. But I told her if I stepped back into that house I was going to kill myself, well try again. And folks, my mom does love me, she just was never taught how to do that. But here's what's going on now. I live with those people still I have to spend some weekends and breaks with my mother tho, they only have educational rights towards me, but they want to adopt me, I want them too, but my mother refuses to talk about that. not because she doesn't think it will be better for me but because it makes her seem like a "failure". So they mentioned me getting emaciated then just living with them, in which I could, I just wish I could've had the chance to be a kid you know. Do I need to involve CPS again, if my mother wont voluntarily sign away her rights? Can I be emaciated but still live with people?...IDK...Im just lost and I really would like some help. Im 16 BTW. Sorry its so long.