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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Nov 2013
    Posts
    7

    Default Help, Need Advice on Protection from Blackmail

    My question involves criminal law for the state of: California

    My question involves criminal law for the state of: California

    I had an affair. It was an on again, off again deal. It was just physical, no long love letters or that sort of thing. I did help her financially a few times when she needed it. Lasted a little over a year.

    In early June, she asked me for $500 for her birthday. I said no, and stopped responding to her texts. Soon after, she sent an mail telling me how terrible I was and that I left her in a lurch and I would have to pay her at least $1000 for her pain and suffering. I replied stating that no promise had been made to pay her anything, that clearly our relationship had taken a turn for the worse and I wanted nothing more to do with her.

    At the end of the month, June 24, I receive a post card at my home address from her city with no return address labeled xoxo and ďletís have a threesome.Ē My wife found this and was not happy as you might guess.

    I assumed it was just a jealous one time act and did not respond to to communicate with the mistress. On July 5, I received a package at my home address. In it was a teddy bear. The return address was an adult products company, also in the mistresses city. There was no note in the package. However, on inspecting the bear, I knew it to be one I had given the mistress on Valentines Day. My wife freaked and will likely leave me, thatís on me.

    I sent the mistress a note saying I had received the package and note, and that if she continued her attempts to blackmail or extort from me I would aggressively pursue all legal remedies.

    I am sure this is not over. What else can I or should I do to protect my reputation and avoid the risk of overt blackmail?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
    Posts
    285

    Default Re: Help, Need Advice on Protection from Blackmail

    Either find a good divorce attorney or come clean with your wife, and see if your wife is willing to go to counseling if you are both willing to salvage the marriage.

    Otherwise, you don't buy a blackmailer's silence, you only rent it.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Mar 2013
    Posts
    17,124

    Default Re: Help, Need Advice on Protection from Blackmail

    Quote Quoting bhartwell
    View Post
    What else can I or should I do to protect my reputation
    Too late for that.

    Quote Quoting bhartwell
    View Post
    and avoid the risk of overt blackmail?
    Report her to the police.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    38,728

    Default Re: Help, Need Advice on Protection from Blackmail

    I’m not sure what there is to report to the police. I read nothing of a demand for money “or else”. I see nothing regarding the money after the one time.

    it appears to be nothing more than the woman being vindictive. At best you might get a cop to see harassment in it but more likely a cop will shake his head as he walks away mumbling something like: “what a dumbass. (He’s) Not getting anything he doesn’t deserve”

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Mar 2013
    Posts
    17,124

    Default Re: Help, Need Advice on Protection from Blackmail

    Quote Quoting jk
    View Post
    I’m not sure what there is to report to the police. I read nothing of a demand for money “or else”. I see nothing regarding the money after the one time.
    I sort of agree but getting her behavior on record with the police (even if the police do nothing) could be a big help if she comes back and actually attempts blackmail.

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