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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Aug 2018
    Posts
    166

    Default Mother is Not Following Order After Final Visitation Order

    Mother is not following the order. She is supposed to drop off child and I do the pickup. During summer she do both pick up and drop off. But now she expect me to do both and to cover all expenses pay gas and toll.

    The order is on alternate weekend and with me for the whole month of July. However because of work Im only taking him with me for few hours and can’t take him on July but asked her to accommodate to my schedule meaning to bring him to the city when I’m off. She is refusing to do one of the pickup and wants me to do both.

    I have no other choice than to file for violation which she also did. Requesting me to do both pick up and drop off at school and on summer and holidays at a near location in her city.

    We’ve been talking on the phone but after I got upset and yelled at her for not picking up she is doing everything on message.

    Also, theres a situation with stepmother where Im making clear to my son that she is not his mother but stepmom. That his little brother is his brother because he is son to his mother and of course teaching him that normal is “mother and father” not “mom and mom”. He is prohibited from talking to her when He is with me and I made it clear he will get time out. Im just trying to be honest with my son.

    This is what she filed for:

    the entry of the order, there has been a change of circumstances in that:
     I dont own a vehicle to drive to the city. I have a one year old son to take care of.  My wife who owns a vehicle started a new job and works 7 days a week in order to financially support my son as father does not cover any of my child expenses.

    Because of this change of circumstances, the order should be modified as follows:
    Im requesting pick up on Friday at school and drop off on Monday at school. On Holidays and summer break at a public location in my city.


    Father is not following visitation order. don’t take my son on alternate weekend and cancelled july. Expect me to accommodate to his scheduled but insults and get verbally aggressive if things don’t go his way.

    Im concern regarding my child mental health. Father talk to my child negatively about his family. Im concern with his discriminatory behavior against my wife and I. My child always comes home crying because father don’t want him to have a relationship with my wife. I have a recording of my son crying and telling me that his father prohibits my son to talk to my wife or punish him physically if he does. My son knows my wife since he was 2 years old and consider her as family.

    IT IS NORMAL FOR ONE PARENT TO DO THE PICKUP AND THE OTHER THE DROP OFF. WHY SHE MAKE IT SO DIFFICULT?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Feb 2014
    Location
    RTR/WDE
    Posts
    1,701

    Default Re: Mother is Not Following Order After Final Visitation Order

    This is all on you, dude. I get that you have cultural differences that some of the advisors here don't grasp, but still... You are hurting that boy and no-one else.
    Don't make me quote Monty Python at you.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    Massachusetts
    Posts
    24,077

    Default Re: Mother is Not Following Order After Final Visitation Order

    Good grief, are you here again?

    Normal is whatever the parents agree to/the court orders.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Mar 2016
    Posts
    2,289

    Default Re: Mother is Not Following Order After Final Visitation Order

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    Mother is not following the order. She is supposed to drop off child and I do the pickup. During summer she do both pick up and drop off. But now she expect me to do both and to cover all expenses pay gas and toll.

    The order is on alternate weekend and with me for the whole month of July. However because of work Im only taking him with me for few hours and can’t take him on July but asked her to accommodate to my schedule meaning to bring him to the city when I’m off. She is refusing to do one of the pickup and wants me to do both.

    I have no other choice than to file for violation which she also did. Requesting me to do both pick up and drop off at school and on summer and holidays at a near location in her city.

    We’ve been talking on the phone but after I got upset and yelled at her for not picking up she is doing everything on message.

    Also, theres a situation with stepmother where Im making clear to my son that she is not his mother but stepmom. That his little brother is his brother because he is son to his mother and of course teaching him that normal is “mother and father” not “mom and mom”. He is prohibited from talking to her when He is with me and I made it clear he will get time out. Im just trying to be honest with my son.

    This is what she filed for:

    the entry of the order, there has been a change of circumstances in that:
     I dont own a vehicle to drive to the city. I have a one year old son to take care of.  My wife who owns a vehicle started a new job and works 7 days a week in order to financially support my son as father does not cover any of my child expenses.

    Because of this change of circumstances, the order should be modified as follows:
    Im requesting pick up on Friday at school and drop off on Monday at school. On Holidays and summer break at a public location in my city.


    Father is not following visitation order. don’t take my son on alternate weekend and cancelled july. Expect me to accommodate to his scheduled but insults and get verbally aggressive if things don’t go his way.

    Im concern regarding my child mental health. Father talk to my child negatively about his family. Im concern with his discriminatory behavior against my wife and I. My child always comes home crying because father don’t want him to have a relationship with my wife. I have a recording of my son crying and telling me that his father prohibits my son to talk to my wife or punish him physically if he does. My son knows my wife since he was 2 years old and consider her as family.

    IT IS NORMAL FOR ONE PARENT TO DO THE PICKUP AND THE OTHER THE DROP OFF. WHY SHE MAKE IT SO DIFFICULT?
    You realize it looks really bad for you when you verbally harass her on the phone. I would go to messages to so I had proof of your harassment and anger. You know that no one here is going to be on your side right?

    Also there's no such thing as a "normal" family. Family can be a mom and dad, two moms, two dads, a single parent, grandparents, aunts, uncles, siblings, etc who care for kids. So you need to stop telling your kid that him having two moms isn't normal. So you punish your son for talking to his stepmom? You know that is abusive right? What's wrong with you? What's your defect? You always post the same stuff that makes you look like crap.

    Every parenting plan is different. My ex's parenting plan said if he lived less than like 145 miles away, he had to pick them up and drop off. If he lived more than 145 miles away, he had to pick up and she had to pick up from his house. Or maybe vice versa - I can't remember anymore but I know there was a mileage limit about who picked up and dropped off. But we always ended up picking up and dropping off even when we lived 4 hours away. She rarely picked them up. Or met us halfway.

    SHE isn't making it difficult. YOU are like you ALWAYS do.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Posts
    15,620

    Default Re: Mother is Not Following Order After Final Visitation Order

    Quote Quoting Back
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    Mother is not following the order. She is supposed to drop off child and I do the pickup. During summer she do both pick up and drop off. But now she expect me to do both and to cover all expenses pay gas and toll.

    The order is on alternate weekend and with me for the whole month of July. However because of work Im only taking him with me for few hours and can’t take him on July but asked her to accommodate to my schedule meaning to bring him to the city when I’m off. She is refusing to do one of the pickup and wants me to do both.

    I have no other choice than to file for violation which she also did. Requesting me to do both pick up and drop off at school and on summer and holidays at a near location in her city.

    We’ve been talking on the phone but after I got upset and yelled at her for not picking up she is doing everything on message.

    Also, theres a situation with stepmother where Im making clear to my son that she is not his mother but stepmom. That his little brother is his brother because he is son to his mother and of course teaching him that normal is “mother and father” not “mom and mom”. He is prohibited from talking to her when He is with me and I made it clear he will get time out. Im just trying to be honest with my son.

    This is what she filed for:

    the entry of the order, there has been a change of circumstances in that:
     I dont own a vehicle to drive to the city. I have a one year old son to take care of.  My wife who owns a vehicle started a new job and works 7 days a week in order to financially support my son as father does not cover any of my child expenses.

    Because of this change of circumstances, the order should be modified as follows:
    Im requesting pick up on Friday at school and drop off on Monday at school. On Holidays and summer break at a public location in my city.


    Father is not following visitation order. don’t take my son on alternate weekend and cancelled july. Expect me to accommodate to his scheduled but insults and get verbally aggressive if things don’t go his way.

    Im concern regarding my child mental health. Father talk to my child negatively about his family. Im concern with his discriminatory behavior against my wife and I. My child always comes home crying because father don’t want him to have a relationship with my wife. I have a recording of my son crying and telling me that his father prohibits my son to talk to my wife or punish him physically if he does. My son knows my wife since he was 2 years old and consider her as family.

    IT IS NORMAL FOR ONE PARENT TO DO THE PICKUP AND THE OTHER THE DROP OFF. WHY SHE MAKE IT SO DIFFICULT?
    If you were obeying the visitation schedule then you might have an argument that she isn't doing her share of the transportation. However, because you refuse to obey the visitation schedule and want to see your son at your convenience/whim, the judge will likely rip you a new one for expecting mom to do ANY of the transportation.

    And when the judge finds out how you are coaching the child about stepmom particularly punishing the child for talking to her, you will really get hit.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Aug 2018
    Posts
    166

    Default Re: Mother is Not Following Order After Final Visitation Order

    Please note that the order say mom does the drop off to the city. Now she is refusing to do so. Stepmother is who complicates everything. How come my ex was able to do the drop off before and now out of the sudden she is claiming that step mother is the one that owns the car and use it to commute to work? That since I asked I want stepmom out of our parenting decisions she is doing so by not allowing my ex to use her car for transportation? I see my ex driving the car so is hers too.

    Mom is claiming she is a full time mother does not work and she cant use public transportation with a one yr old to bring my child to the city. Seriously?

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Posts
    1,138

    Default Re: Mother is Not Following Order After Final Visitation Order

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    That since I asked I want stepmom out of our parenting decisions she is doing so by not allowing my ex to use her car for transportation? I see my ex driving the car so is hers too.
    You want the best of both worlds and cannot have it. If stepmom owns the car and drives it to work to support them, and you want stepmom to do YOU a favor by allowing your ex to bring your son to you, you best start being nicer about stepmom. Just because one drives a car does NOT mean "it is hers too".

    And yes it is tough to bring 2 kids on public transportation.... how 'bout you pony up some $s to buy your ex-wife a car or pay taxi fare both ways? Rather than expecting her or the step mom to do so?

    "The order is on alternate weekend and with me for the whole month of July. However because of work Im only taking him with me for few hours and can’t take him on July but asked her to accommodate to my schedule meaning to bring him to the city when I’m off. She is refusing to do one of the pickup and wants me to do both. "

    YOU are the one not following the order and you expect her to work around your schedule? You should have considered how you were going to deal with childcare for your son for the whole month of July while you were at work. Or you should be paying her for babysitting your child during time you were supposed to have him and feed him and cloth him, etc. Why must she always work around your schedule? Dude, you live in the USA....parenting is a equal thing.....you deserve no more than what the court orders and even then you don't take that and then complain she won't work with you. I am really surprised the court actually gave you a whole month and as much as you say you want to spend time with your child, you refuse?

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Aug 2018
    Posts
    166

    Default Re: Mother is Not Following Order After Final Visitation Order

    Mother now refuses to talk to me on the phone. She wants everything via message which I refuse as I know is step mom.

    How can I have her talk on the phone? Will the judge be able to intervene

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    Massachusetts
    Posts
    24,077

    Default Re: Mother is Not Following Order After Final Visitation Order

    Oh, no. I'm not traveling down that path with you again, my friend. And I doubt if anyone else here will, either.

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Posts
    15,620

    Default Re: Mother is Not Following Order After Final Visitation Order

    Quote Quoting hr for me
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    You want the best of both worlds and cannot have it. If stepmom owns the car and drives it to work to support them, and you want stepmom to do YOU a favor by allowing your ex to bring your son to you, you best start being nicer about stepmom. Just because one drives a car does NOT mean "it is hers too".

    And yes it is tough to bring 2 kids on public transportation.... how 'bout you pony up some $s to buy your ex-wife a car or pay taxi fare both ways? Rather than expecting her or the step mom to do so?

    "The order is on alternate weekend and with me for the whole month of July. However because of work Im only taking him with me for few hours and can’t take him on July but asked her to accommodate to my schedule meaning to bring him to the city when I’m off. She is refusing to do one of the pickup and wants me to do both. "

    YOU are the one not following the order and you expect her to work around your schedule? You should have considered how you were going to deal with childcare for your son for the whole month of July while you were at work. Or you should be paying her for babysitting your child during time you were supposed to have him and feed him and cloth him, etc. Why must she always work around your schedule? Dude, you live in the USA....parenting is a equal thing.....you deserve no more than what the court orders and even then you don't take that and then complain she won't work with you. I am really surprised the court actually gave you a whole month and as much as you say you want to spend time with your child, you refuse?
    I had a whole speech to make but I have done it on so many threads for this guy I just cannot do it again. Suffice to say that he is a male chauvinist pig who is beyond freaked out that his ex-wife left him for another woman but who still believes that the child rearing is the responsibility of the female and that his needs/wishes should be given deference in all things.

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