Results 1 to 8 of 8
  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jul 2018
    Posts
    4

    Default Getting Custody After Children Are Taken From Your Ex- Into State Care

    My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Kentucky

    I live in Texas, she lives in Kentucky with the kids. She moved from Texas to Kentucky 2 years ago when we decided we were going to separate and begin divorce proceedings.

    I just found out, Father's Day, that my wife (we have NOT finalized divorce yet, we are still technically married) had our children taken into state custody permanently. They are with a Foster family, but not adopted to them. (This, apparently, happened last December!)

    Upon discovering this, I have been in contact with the courts system and CPS with regard to them not contacting me.

    We (myself and CPS) have arranged a court hearing on August 9 with regard to the fact that I would have, and still do, want to have full custody.

    I would have taken them initially, in December, had they contacted me about taking the kids from her; however, even they admit, they didn't try to make me aware of the situation since I live in Texas (their own admission).

    What, if anything, should I say or do, to gain custody of my children?

    There is no custody agreement between my soon to be ex and myself.
    CPS doesn't seem keen on the idea of an out of state transfer of custody (although I will be there in person on the court date).

    My thought process: we are not divorced. Therefore, at any time prior to, or during this incident, my STBX could have given me custody. And I, just as well, could have picked them up from school or anywhere and taken them home to my house and nothing could have been done.
    How is this situation any different?
    I don't want my kids in the system and had I known she was having trouble, I would have taken them. She originally begged me to let her take the kids, and had been really good (until last December... Should have been a red flag) about letting us video chat almost daily and letting me visit at least once a month when I would drive out there in person.

    CPS already ran a background check on me and it came back clean. We verified paternity via the vital records office and birth certificates.

    If I need to clarify more points, please ask. My mind is a jumble and I want to be able to go in and make a clear, concise, point to the judge when it is my turn.

    Is there a legal precedent to this? I don't know how to or what to look for, I've been trying. Which is what landed me here.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Sep 2017
    Posts
    493

    Default Re: Paternal Custody - No Custody Agreement

    You’ve had no contact with your kids for 7 months to know that they weren’t with their mom? How did that happen?

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jul 2018
    Posts
    4

    Default Re: Paternal Custody - No Custody Agreement

    ahhhh accidently deleted my response when I went to edit it!

    My STBX began recording videos she could send through text messaging instead of live chat. So we would send short clips back and forth to talk instead.
    I was unaware that these were during supervised visitation. (I had no reason to suspect such).
    She had told me that she couldn't afford internet due to the holidays, I didn't argue. I saw no reason to.
    I didn't question as to why I only got once a week to talk to them, as I was very busy myself, and I presumed she was just working more to make up some money.

    As to why I stopped my monthly visits: I have been in the process of selling/buying a new house since last September. (That's much more of a hassle than just buying one! Holy crap!)
    I visited for only one day in September and October each, and we all spent 5 days together for Thanksgiving in November.
    I haven't driven across the country since, it's just been hectic. I was content with staying in contact with video messages for the time being.

    we get along very very well.
    Even despite this. She made a bad mistake, a terrible one, but we can't change the past, there's no point in been mad at her right now. This issue about the kids being in the system is more important. all we can do is move forward.
    She and I are working together to remedy this. however, my questions posed in the OP still stand.

    I presume your question is asked because you are making a point that that's something the judge will want to know?

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Mar 2016
    Posts
    2,289

    Default Re: Paternal Custody - No Custody Agreement

    Yeah the judge will probably want to know why it took 7 months and it's curiosity to know how a parent doesn't communicate with their children for 7 months.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jul 2018
    Posts
    4

    Default Re: Paternal Custody - No Custody Agreement

    We did communicate that entire time, just not Skype.
    Thank you for clarifying. I'll make sure to directly mention that.
    My STBX isn't contesting any of this. But, does anyone have anything with regard to the OPs questions?

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Oct 2016
    Posts
    3,231

    Default Re: Paternal Custody - No Custody Agreement

    Letter of reference from upstanding members of your community certainly wouldn't hurt at the hearing. In fact, taking people with you who can testify that you are in fact an upstanding member of the community would be good in the eyes of the judge.

    The judge will certainly ask the question as to why you didn't know about the children being in foster care. But unless there is some hard evidence of your unfitness to be a parent I can't imagine that in the end you would not be given custody.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    Behind a Desk
    Posts
    98,846

    Default Re: Paternal Custody - No Custody Agreement

    Quote Quoting UberGoober
    View Post
    Upon discovering this, I have been in contact with the courts system and CPS with regard to them not contacting me.
    What reason have you obtained for the lack of contact? Did your ex- claim not to know your address, or intentionally give a false address? Why didn't your ex- ever contact you to let you know what was going on?
    Quote Quoting UberGoober
    We (myself and CPS) have arranged a court hearing on August 9 with regard to the fact that I would have, and still do, want to have full custody.
    In the interim, I suggest consulting a lawyer in the county where the court proceedings occurred, or seeing if you qualify for a court-appointed lawyer.
    Quote Quoting UberGoober
    There is no custody agreement between my soon to be ex and myself.
    If you have a pending divorce case that is well over seven months old, and your ex- has surrendered her parental rights, it should be easy enough for you to get an order of temporary sole custody -- or to conclude the divorce case with a permanent order of sole custody.
    Quote Quoting UberGoober
    CPS doesn't seem keen on the idea of an out of state transfer of custody (although I will be there in person on the court date).
    They don't want to lose jurisdiction, especially before they make sure that the children will be safe if placed in your custody.
    Quote Quoting UberGoober
    My thought process: we are not divorced. Therefore, at any time prior to, or during this incident, my STBX could have given me custody.
    She should have done so rather than engaging in whatever acts or omissions led to the children's removal and loss of her parental rights; but she can't unring that bell. Once the children enter protective proceedings, you need to regain custody through the protective proceeding and that court's jurisdiction won't be lost due to an order in your custody case.
    Quote Quoting PayrolGuy
    View Post
    Letter of reference from upstanding members of your community certainly wouldn't hurt at the hearing.
    Letters from people who have first-hand knowledge of your parenting could be helpful with protective services, but are not likely to be considered by a court because such letters are hearsay documents. Don't have out-of-state people come to a court hearing without first being certain that testimony will be taken at the hearing and that they will be able to testify -- or they'll waste the trip.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jul 2018
    Posts
    4

    Default Re: Getting Custody After Children Are Taken From Your Ex- Into State Care

    I apologise for not responding to your replies.
    I have since arranged for a lawyer in the locality for the case to look over things for me and have been advised very similar to what Mr.knowitall has stated.
    She does not think that I should have any issue gaining custody of the children; however, she believes she can convince the judge to waive the lengthy process of interstate home evaluation. Especially with the school semester rapidly approaching.
    She does not think the judge would object, given that they have already done a background check on me and my employment.

    She does stress to me, that this is only an assumption and there could be up to a couple months delay in my custody if they do decide to do a home evaluation. But, that I should get my children nonetheless.

    I thank you for your diligence in answering my questions!

    1. Sponsored Links
       

Similar Threads

  1. Modification of Support: Paying Child Support for Children in State Care
    By DazMan in forum Child Custody, Support and Visitation
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 09-26-2014, 04:38 PM
  2. Court Proceedings: Trying to Regain Custody of Children Placed in Family Member's Care
    By annett in forum Abuse and Neglect
    Replies: 10
    Last Post: 08-07-2012, 05:54 PM
  3. Court Proceedings: How Does an Out-of-State Parent Get Custody of Child in Care of State
    By mry_wgnr in forum Abuse and Neglect
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 10-02-2010, 07:20 PM
  4. Protective Services: Repatriation of Children Who Are in State Care Abroad
    By paulinag in forum Abuse and Neglect
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 09-16-2010, 09:11 AM
  5. Deprivation of Civil Rights: Denial Of Medical Care For Children In State Care
    By Gee-Oh in forum Civil Rights
    Replies: 8
    Last Post: 06-16-2008, 06:51 PM
 
 
Sponsored Links

Legal Help, Information and Resources