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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Posts
    20

    Default Re: Husband new job...Spousal Support?

    Greed? Gold digging? Hold on there. You don't know anything about my situation. My husband has been diagnosed with Narcissistic Personality Disorder/NPD (look it up...it'll freak you out). He's selfish and greedy to an unhealthy extent. We got married, were going to start a family after about a year and I was going to be a stay-at-home mom. Right after we got married, my husband STOPPED sleeping with me ( I mean that in EVERY sense of the word), he's been verbally, emotionally and a little physically abusive. He refused to open a checking account with me because he says "his money is his and it's none of my business what he does w/his money". He refused to help pay for our wedding. (Our wedding was about $25,000. I paid 10k in cash and 15k on credit. We decided to just to pay for it that way and after the wedding we'd both be responsible for the debt and pay it off. After our honeymoon my husband decided he wasn't going to pitch in for it. I'm STILL paying it off. During our marriage we've bought a house, rented out our 2 condos which we each had while we were single, and we've bought 2 rental properties. All of my husband's time, energy and money has gone into himself and properties...all the while telling me "it's for our retirement"...and it's for the "future of our children". He's not interested in retiring w/me and he's not interested in children. It was all a lie. I could go on and on about how greedy my husband is. He hides money from me and lies about everything. In fact, he just told me a few days ago that he let his friend "borrow" $8,000 out of a line of credit that we have. He did this w/out telling me. So, please don't call me a greedy gold digger. I've worked very hard at this relationship. I'm older now and it's almost too late for me to have children. He's taken a lot from me. If I'm entitled to an extra $300 a month, then I want it. It's only fair.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Location
    Michigan
    Posts
    28,906

    Default Re: Husband new job...Spousal Support?

    Sometimes people carry a bit too much of their own personal baggage into their comments on certain subjects. It's best to ignore it.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Posts
    20

    Default Re: Husband new job...Spousal Support?

    Good idea. Thank you.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Posts
    2

    Default Re: Husband's New Job and Spousal Support

    Obviously you have a lot of resentment toward him, and rightfully so. Is your objective to make him pay for what he did to you or to get what you believe is fair? Sometimes it makes sense to cut your losses and move on with your life - especially when the legal costs don't justify the small amount of money you are seeking.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Florida
    Posts
    2,773

    Default Re: Husband's New Job and Spousal Support

    Quote Quoting tybalt
    View Post
    Obviously you have a lot of resentment toward him, and rightfully so. Is your objective to make him pay for what he did to you or to get what you believe is fair? Sometimes it makes sense to cut your losses and move on with your life - especially when the legal costs don't justify the small amount of money you are seeking.
    Please look at the date of a thread before you post. This thread is almost a year old and the OP's situation has most likely changed.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Location
    Omaha, NE
    Posts
    26

    Default Re: Husband's New Job and Spousal Support

    You know, for a single mother that I am, I strive to work hard so that I can take care of my kids. I do recieve child support and yes, I was offered "spousal support" at the time of the divorce but then I was working and also going to school at the time so it really was not needed. I think that spousal support should be given to those who can not work due to being disabled for some reason.

    Even though me and my ex were married for 4.5 years too, just like you, my lawyer was telling me about this allimony or spousal support. I was told that since I was the first wife, I am entitled to allimony but it is my choice to take it or not. I chose not to take it and I guess I can no longer get allimony if I decide to get married again then divorced.

    Some people know how to work the system though and they can get what they want. But you know what my all time goal is.....to see that the kids father would get to spend as much time as he wants to with the kids. My kids father is in the military and stationed in another country right now. He has not seen his kids in over a year but he gets to talk to them when he can on the phone.

    Your ex husband works very hard for his money, I bet. And I would not doubt that you do the same for your money. Why cry for more money that does not really belong to you? Once you are divorced you have a lot of time to make a life for yourself again and find that career that's just right for you. If you can work, go back to school to find that career. And if you can work again, you should not have to be calling for more money. $37,000 is a lot of money for a single person for one year. I am lucky as a single parent to make that much even with the support that I recieve from my ex. And you know what, that is really good for a single parent.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Posts
    20

    Default Re: Husband new job...Spousal Support?

    He actually switched jobs w/out even talking to me about it. He mentioned to me that he was interviewing for another job but told me it was straight commission and that it would take a few years to build up a clientele. I asked him not to do it since we have so many bills and also since we were suppose to start a family. He took the job anyways. He just came home one day and told me he accepted the job.

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