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  1. #1

    Exclamation Can You Withhold Your Address From Your Ex- if You Have Sole Physical Custody

    My question involves a child custody case from the State of: California

    Unfortunately, my ex has threatened to kill me and my family before. He self-committed into the VA psychiatric ward but not the judge has granted him 50% Legal custody.

    I am going per se because I cannot afford lawyers anymore. The OPC is insisting that I disclose my address. I am scared

    I couldn't find what are the rights and obligations of legal custody in CA. Is there such check list? I only seen guidelines.

  2. #2
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    Default Re: Can I Withhold My Address to a Ex That Has 50% Legal if I Have 100% Physical Cust

    Quote Quoting xrigau@hotmail.com
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    My question involves a child custody case from the State of: California

    Unfortunately, my ex has threatened to kill me and my family before. He self-committed into the VA psychiatric ward but not the judge has granted him 50% Legal custody.

    I am going per se because I cannot afford lawyers anymore. The OPC is insisting that I disclose my address. I am scared

    I couldn't find what are the rights and obligations of legal custody in CA. Is there such check list? I only seen guidelines.
    Legal custody is shared decision making. Does he have any parenting time? What do you mean by 100% physical custody?

    Also, what does OPC stand for? I tried to look it up for CA, but the only thing I could find was the Ocean Patrol Council and I doubt you mean that.

  3. #3

    Default Re: Can I Withhold My Address to a Ex That Has 50% Legal if I Have 100% Physical Cust

    OPC = Opposing Party Counsel (sorry)
    He only has supervised visitation because the 10 child alleged sexual abuse in a forensic interview and posterior therapy sessions.
    100% Physical custody means that the child leaves with me all the time.

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    Default Re: Can I Withhold My Address to a Ex That Has 50% Legal if I Have 100% Physical Cust

    Quote Quoting xrigau@hotmail.com
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    OPC = Opposing Party Counsel (sorry)
    He only has supervised visitation because the 10 child alleged sexual abuse in a forensic interview and posterior therapy sessions.
    100% Physical custody means that the child leaves with me all the time.
    Am I safe to assume that the supervised visits take place outside of the home?

    I see no reason why he has to have your address. I do not care what the opposing council says, I would not give him your address unless a judge orders you to do so. He doesn't need your address to participate in joint decisions regarding the child. How are the two of you ordered to communicate about the child?

  5. #5

    Default Re: Can I Withhold My Address to a Ex That Has 50% Legal if I Have 100% Physical Cust

    The visitations take place at Hanna's House and we both pay for the supervision.
    The communications happens thought a system called Talking Parents.
    Thank you very much for you answers.

    In regards to the rights and obligations of legal custody in CA. Is there such check list? I only seen guidelines.

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    Default Re: Can I Withhold My Address to a Ex That Has 50% Legal if I Have 100% Physical Cust

    Quote Quoting llworking
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    Am I safe to assume that the supervised visits take place outside of the home?

    I see no reason why he has to have your address. I do not care what the opposing council says, I would not give him your address unless a judge orders you to do so. He doesn't need your address to participate in joint decisions regarding the child. How are the two of you ordered to communicate about the child?
    Not the wisest thing you've ever typed.

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    Default Re: Can I Withhold My Address to a Ex That Has 50% Legal if I Have 100% Physical Cust

    Quote Quoting Dogmatique
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    Not the wisest thing you've ever typed.
    Maybe, maybe not. However safety is a definitely issue here and its safer to withhold that information until or unless a judge requires it to be divulged. His visitation is supervised at a supervision center and their communications as parents are monitored as well through "Talking Parents". Therefore the judge clearly thinks that the situation is serious.

  8. #8
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    Default Re: Can I Withhold My Address to a Ex That Has 50% Legal if I Have 100% Physical Cust

    Given that she is representing herself, I could see opposing counsel needing her address should service be required for something outside of court or some other justified reason. The trick would be making sure the ex doesn't get it. I have no idea how that would work, whether the judge could order the attorney not to disclose it or if OP could be allowed some form of accommodation.

  9. #9
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    Default Re: Can You Withhold Your Address From Your Ex- if You Have Sole Physical Custody

    Quote Quoting xrigau@hotmail.com
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    The OPC is insisting that I disclose my address. I am scared.
    Do you have a protective order in place, whether through an independent proceeding or through the custody case?

    Beyond needing to serve you with legal documents, it is routine for parents to be ordered to disclose the child's place of residence during their parenting time to the other parent. If your existing orders do not include such a provision, you are not in violation of those orders by declining to provide the child's address; but you are going to reach a point at which this issue is going to be raised before the court.

    If you have already been ordered to disclose the address through an existing custody order, you are expected to comply with the order -- so if that's the case, you will need to bring a motion with the court asking that you be allowed to keep the child's address from your ex- and his lawyer, and provide a convincing factual and legal case such that the court may grant your petition.

  10. #10

    Default Re: Can I Withhold My Address to a Ex That Has 50% Legal if I Have 100% Physical Cust

    So I've been using my parents address fort the court. Not a problem for 5 years. The address issue is new since the legal custody changed.

    Quote Quoting Mr. Knowitall
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    Do you have a protective order in place, whether through an independent proceeding or through the custody case?

    Beyond needing to serve you with legal documents, it is routine for parents to be ordered to disclose the child's place of residence during their parenting time to the other parent. If your existing orders do not include such a provision, you are not in violation of those orders by declining to provide the child's address; but you are going to reach a point at which this issue is going to be raised before the court.

    If you have already been ordered to disclose the address through an existing custody order, you are expected to comply with the order -- so if that's the case, you will need to bring a motion with the court asking that you be allowed to keep the child's address from your ex- and his lawyer, and provide a convincing factual and legal case such that the court may grant your petition.
    Thanks. I'll file a letter from our therapist when he threatened, in joint session, to kill my family and commit suicide in a police shootout. His lawyer convinced an interim judge that the letter wasn't admissible evidence to court because it was patient-doctor confidentiality. I don't think my lawyer at that time was very brilliant to say the least. I was in that therapy session too. I had a restraining order after that but since he didn't violate the order the judge lifted it. Needles to say he has killed plenty of people when deployed and he has guns.

    Thanks for the advise.

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