
Quoting
Mr. Knowitall
A complaint or petition for divorce will very often include pro forma, boilerplate language requesting attorney fees, whether or not the party actually expects to receive them, because the general rule is that if you don't ask, you won't get.
When one spouse in a divorce case is married and the other is not, it makes sense for the unmarried spouse to get a lawyer. It isn't that it couldn't happen, but takes a lot of trust to count on the spouse who is divorcing you and that spouse's lawyer to be giving you a fair deal.
If the goal is to settle, she can decline any settlement that she regards as unfair. I think it's fair to say that it is obvious that she would decline a settlement offer in which her ex- didn't pay his own legal fees and costs.