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  1. #1

    Default Will a Court Grant a Father's Demand for More Visitation

    My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Michigan
    I am writing on behalf of my sister in law. She has a child and she offered more visitation without the courts to her sons dad since their was no new court order in the last year and a half. Her sons dad is threatening to bring her back to court if she does not oblige to his demands.
    Such as, he asked if he could have an extra overnight one week, and then she said no cuz he wouldnt be picking up their three year old until 7pm and then the child goes to bed on a good schedule around 8pm. He also had the child that whole weekend anyways and brings him home often two to three hours early so she hasnt been excited giving more time because he doesnt uphold the time he does have and or
    pawns his child off on his wife or parents or cancels last minute most Thursdays. Right now, he gets every other full weekend from Friday to Sunday with overnights and every Thursday from 5-8 IF
    he takes him and or isnt working. He gets very demanding with her and he is threatening to take her back for more time. We all want him involved, but we have been baffled how he demands time, but then
    doesnt spend his full time with his child. I know he can do whatever he wants with his time, but the demands and threats get a little upsetting. He also smokes in the car with her son and he wreaks of smoke when he comes home. That is an ongoing issue and it really disturbs us he cant wait to have a cigerette. Im just curious what normal time is anyways on a 3 year old?

  2. #2
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    Default Re: Opinion on Visitation

    Quote Quoting positivethoughts
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    My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Michigan
    I am writing on behalf of my sister in law. She has a child and she offered more visitation without the courts to her sons dad since their was no new court order in the last year and a half. Her sons dad is threatening to bring her back to court if she does not oblige to his demands.
    Such as, he asked if he could have an extra overnight one week, and then she said no cuz he wouldnt be picking up their three year old until 7pm and then the child goes to bed on a good schedule around 8pm. He also had the child that whole weekend anyways and brings him home often two to three hours early so she hasnt been excited giving more time because he doesnt uphold the time he does have and or
    pawns his child off on his wife or parents or cancels last minute most Thursdays. Right now, he gets every other full weekend from Friday to Sunday with overnights and every Thursday from 5-8 IF
    he takes him and or isnt working. He gets very demanding with her and he is threatening to take her back for more time. We all want him involved, but we have been baffled how he demands time, but then
    doesnt spend his full time with his child. I know he can do whatever he wants with his time, but the demands and threats get a little upsetting. He also smokes in the car with her son and he wreaks of smoke when he comes home. That is an ongoing issue and it really disturbs us he cant wait to have a cigerette. Im just curious what normal time is anyways on a 3 year old?
    The current visitation order is very standard. Every other weekend and one evening a week. Your sister in law is not required to give him more time, and certainly should not give into demands and threats. She might want to be flexible now and then if he asks nicely, but not if he threatens and demands.

    She should keep a calendar of when he does and doesn't exercise his parenting time. That way, if he takes her back to court for more time, she can demonstrate that he is not using all the time that he already has.

  3. #3

    Default Re: Will a Court Grant a Father's Demand for More Visitation

    Quote Quoting positivethoughts
    View Post
    My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Michigan
    I am writing on behalf of my sister in law. She has a child and she offered more visitation without the courts to her sons dad since their was no new court order in the last year and a half. Her sons dad is threatening to bring her back to court if she does not oblige to his demands.
    Such as, he asked if he could have an extra overnight one week, and then she said no cuz he wouldnt be picking up their three year old until 7pm and then the child goes to bed on a good schedule around 8pm. He also had the child that whole weekend anyways and brings him home often two to three hours early so she hasnt been excited giving more time because he doesnt uphold the time he does have and or
    pawns his child off on his wife or parents or cancels last minute most Thursdays. Right now, he gets every other full weekend from Friday to Sunday with overnights and every Thursday from 5-8 IF
    he takes him and or isnt working. He gets very demanding with her and he is threatening to take her back for more time. We all want him involved, but we have been baffled how he demands time, but then
    doesnt spend his full time with his child. I know he can do whatever he wants with his time, but the demands and threats get a little upsetting. He also smokes in the car with her son and he wreaks of smoke when he comes home. That is an ongoing issue and it really disturbs us he cant wait to have a cigerette. Im just curious what normal time is anyways on a 3 year old?
    THEIR not HER

    He is entitled to seek a modification of visitation. She - not you - should seek the advice of an attorney as to the practices of the court with jurisdiction. She does not have to be "excited" about anything; she does have to comply with the court orders.

  4. #4

    Default Re: Will a Court Grant a Father's Demand for More Visitation

    I am just asking for her as she is stressed and doesnt know of this website and I thought I'd help destress the issue by asking the question. The original court order (no new one in over a year and a half) is Saturday to Sunday every other weekend and Wednesday evenings 5-8. He changed jobs, she worked with him and rearranged the schedule AND gave him two extra overnights a month with the added Friday. So she IS working with him and trying to. And she is upholding his visitation. I dont see where you think I was alluding that she wasnt. And this is a law site, not a grammar and english correction site. I dont know why you had to emphasive "their" with "her". It's a simple grammar error. English is not my forte. I just wanted advice for her. She is stressed and if I can help, I do! Whats the problem in that? That is what family is for. Its very difficult for one to go through these things alone. She knows she will have to talk to her attorney and not me. So I never said I was going to talk to a lawyer for her. I dont know where your getting these assumptions. I just want answers and facts. I dont need heckling over grammar and the fact I want to help my sister in law by helping her find out information.

  5. #5
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    Default Re: Will a Court Grant a Father's Demand for More Visitation

    Quote Quoting positivethoughts
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    I am just asking for her as she is stressed and doesnt know of this website and I thought I'd help destress the issue by asking the question. The original court order (no new one in over a year and a half) is Saturday to Sunday every other weekend and Wednesday evenings 5-8. He changed jobs, she worked with him and rearranged the schedule AND gave him two extra overnights a month with the added Friday. So she IS working with him and trying to. And she is upholding his visitation. I dont see where you think I was alluding that she wasnt. And this is a law site, not a grammar and english correction site. I dont know why you had to emphasive "their" with "her". It's a simple grammar error. English is not my forte. I just wanted advice for her. She is stressed and if I can help, I do! Whats the problem in that? That is what family is for. Its very difficult for one to go through these things alone. She knows she will have to talk to her attorney and not me. So I never said I was going to talk to a lawyer for her. I dont know where your getting these assumptions. I just want answers and facts. I dont need heckling over grammar and the fact I want to help my sister in law by helping her find out information.
    Good grief. Tell her to speak to a local attorney. That's what a caring family member does, because this is her problem, and she'll have to put on the big girl undies and deal with it herself.
    An intelligent hell would be better than a stupid paradise - Victor Hugo

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  6. #6
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    Default Re: Will a Court Grant a Father's Demand for More Visitation

    It isn't heckling. It is because many, many, many people come on this site and use words like MY child, or HER child, indicating that the person doesn't consider the other parent to be equal to them. It's so important when going to court to use the proper terminology so that it doesn't come across as one parent trying to cut out the other parent, even unintentionally.

    As for helping your sister, it is much harder to give good information when everything you are giving us, is third party info, and therefore not reliable. It is much easier to work with an actual party to the case because they are privy to all the details and not just the ones that were shared with you.

  7. #7
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    Default Re: Will a Court Grant a Father's Demand for More Visitation

    Quote Quoting readytoleave
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    It isn't heckling. It is because many, many, many people come on this site and use words like MY child, or HER child, indicating that the person doesn't consider the other parent to be equal to them. It's so important when going to court to use the proper terminology so that it doesn't come across as one parent trying to cut out the other parent, even unintentionally.

    As for helping your sister, it is much harder to give good information when everything you are giving us, is third party info, and therefore not reliable. It is much easier to work with an actual party to the case because they are privy to all the details and not just the ones that were shared with you.
    Personally, I do not have any problem with someone saying "my child". Nobody in the real word ever refers to a child as "our" child unless they happen to be in the same place at the time. For example, if my ex and I were both someplace and I was going to introduce my daughter to someone, I would introduce her as "our daughter". However in just about any other context I would say "my daughter" because saying "our daughter" would seem grammatically odd and unwieldy. In this context the "her daughter" seems the same to me.

  8. #8
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    Default Re: Will a Court Grant a Father's Demand for More Visitation

    Quote Quoting OKisNotOK
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    THEIR not HER

    He is entitled to seek a modification of visitation. She - not you - should seek the advice of an attorney as to the practices of the court with jurisdiction. She does not have to be "excited" about anything; she does have to comply with the court orders.
    She was right in saying her son's dad - she's a third person talking about someone else's child.

    Also - the court order right now does not state more time. He wants more time and she isn't giving it to him - and she isn't excited to give him more time if she had to because he doesn't uphold the time he has right now. Did you even read the statement?

    Quote Quoting positivethoughts
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    I am just asking for her as she is stressed and doesnt know of this website and I thought I'd help destress the issue by asking the question. The original court order (no new one in over a year and a half) is Saturday to Sunday every other weekend and Wednesday evenings 5-8. He changed jobs, she worked with him and rearranged the schedule AND gave him two extra overnights a month with the added Friday. So she IS working with him and trying to. And she is upholding his visitation. I dont see where you think I was alluding that she wasnt. And this is a law site, not a grammar and english correction site. I dont know why you had to emphasive "their" with "her". It's a simple grammar error. English is not my forte. I just wanted advice for her. She is stressed and if I can help, I do! Whats the problem in that? That is what family is for. Its very difficult for one to go through these things alone. She knows she will have to talk to her attorney and not me. So I never said I was going to talk to a lawyer for her. I dont know where your getting these assumptions. I just want answers and facts. I dont need heckling over grammar and the fact I want to help my sister in law by helping her find out information.
    Direct her to this site and tell her to explain the situation and court order. It's easier from her than from a third party.

  9. #9
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    Default Re: Will a Court Grant a Father's Demand for More Visitation

    Quote Quoting llworking
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    Personally, I do not have any problem with someone saying "my child". Nobody in the real word ever refers to a child as "our" child unless they happen to be in the same place at the time. For example, if my ex and I were both someplace and I was going to introduce my daughter to someone, I would introduce her as "our daughter". However in just about any other context I would say "my daughter" because saying "our daughter" would seem grammatically odd and unwieldy. In this context the "her daughter" seems the same to me.
    I personally don't have a problem with it either. I just know that some people do tend to focus in on that and that in a lot of cases, it IS the parent insinuating that the child belongs more to them then the other parent. I was just explaining that to the OP, as well as the reasoning behind it.

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