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  1. #1

    Exclamation Can a Custodial Parent Obtain a Restraining Order Against Their Minor Child

    My question involves restraining orders in the State of: California. I am seriously considering filing a restraining order against my son, who will be 15 in Aug. I have sole custody & no family to take him. He has become increasing violent & verbally abusive over the last 5 years. I have tried getting him help but mental health services in my county are horrible. Not a lot to chose from. He is currently in counseling, seeing a psych & on psych meds for being bipolar. He has been in counseling for almost 3 years now. I am afraid that sooner or later an altercation with him will result in someone being seriously injured or killed (probably me) and someone going to jail (probably him). I really don't want to see that happen but I am at a lose as to what to do. If I get a restraining order, where will he live? Is that even an option if there is no family to take him in?

    He is currently in Juvenile Hall for assaulting me last night.

    Thank you.

  2. #2
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    Default Re: Can a Custodial Parent Obtain a Restraining Order Against Their Minor Child

    Have you thought about having him committed? I'd be calling his therapist and seeing what that professional recommends.
    Don't make me quote Monty Python at you.

  3. #3

    Default Re: Can a Custodial Parent Obtain a Restraining Order Against Their Minor Child

    It's not that easy in California. He'd have to be a lot worse, mostly a danger to himself.

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    Default Re: Can a Custodial Parent Obtain a Restraining Order Against Their Minor Child

    Quote Quoting karousel1968
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    It's not that easy in California. He'd have to be a lot worse, mostly a danger to himself.
    If you haven't already, see if this might help: https://www.healthychildren.org/Engl...f-Control.aspx

    Or this: http://www.focusas.org/state-family-...rnia-programs/
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  5. #5
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    Default Re: Can a Custodial Parent Obtain a Restraining Order Against Their Minor Child

    A restraining order is not really an option. There is an off chance you MIGHT be able to get one for peaceful contact, but if he violates it and goes to juvenile hall, he'll be released back to you and you'd still have to pay the county back for the costs of that incarceration - as you may very well have to pay for the costs of his current incarceration.

    If he will be criminally charged for his recent assault, then it is very likely that there shall be conditions of release and eventually probation that he will have to abide by - likely to include NOT disobeying you or attacking you. However, if he is severely disturbed, it may not be possible to hold him entirely accountable for his actions.

    Your best bet might be to see if you can get the court's assistance and counseling and mandating medication while on probation. Unfortunately, this is a tough balancing act and you are in a horrible gray area situation.
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  6. #6
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    Default Re: Can a Custodial Parent Obtain a Restraining Order Against Their Minor Child

    I am sorry you are going through this - I went through something very similar. California makes it very very difficult to get a child help and to protect parents and the rest of the family. Basically a child has to to be physically harming themselves in the presence of a judge for a parent to get any support in getting the child the help they need. In the end, I went through my insurance company's mental health benefits. Upon release from a local psychiatric hospital where she had "Roger S'd" herself out, an organization hired by my insurance company "escorted" (in handcuffs) her to a waiting car. She fought an screamed as they drove up the coast. Meanwhile, one of their staff booked, cancelled and rebooked flights as they drove up the coast until she calmed down enough they could get her on a flight. She was flown to Utah where she attended an 'outward bound" type of program.

    Try going the medical route instead of the legal route if you can.

  7. #7
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    Default Re: Can a Custodial Parent Obtain a Restraining Order Against Their Minor Child

    Quote Quoting BooRennie
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    Have you thought about having him committed? I'd be calling his therapist and seeing what that professional recommends.
    Hospitalizing you child is easy as a parent in your case. You need the assistance of a doctor (psychiatrist or psychologist) and a psychiatric facility. Generally the state doesn't do long term care for psychiatric care (thanks, Reagan!) Your son would have to pose an extreme risk to others, not only to himself. You can always request a 72 hour hold.

    I suspect you'll be unable to get a restraining order on your son. Who has no where else to go. Who's 15.

    If I may ask, what meds is he on? I am also bipolar and I was hospitalized in the golden days of private psych hospitals, the 1990's.
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  8. #8
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    Default Re: Can a Custodial Parent Obtain a Restraining Order Against Their Minor Child

    What the heck is "Roger S"?

    Cranford, taking someone in physical restraints when they are neither under arrest nor under any court or legal order of detention is a great way to get in trouble with the police! You cannot restrain someone and transport them against their will - we call that kidnapping, in CA. Among other possible offenses. THIS situation sounds quite fishy, and I wonder what the legality of this situation actually was.
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  9. #9
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    Default Re: Can a Custodial Parent Obtain a Restraining Order Against Their Minor Child

    Google it.

    You are incorrect. The child was at risk to herself and others. But that is not the issue here.

  10. #10
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    Default Re: Can a Custodial Parent Obtain a Restraining Order Against Their Minor Child

    Quote Quoting Cranford
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    Google it.

    You are incorrect. The child was at risk to herself and others. But that is not the issue here.
    Again, what is "Roger S"?

    And, I don't HAVE to Google the law on the process. Absent a court order or other legal process, one cannot generally forcibly restrain and transfer anyone - even a minor. If this was legal, then it must have been part of a specific legal process. Perhaps you'd care to let us know what that was? Do you know under what code he was restrained? If he was RELEASED from a mental health facility, the presumption is that he was no longer on an involuntary hold. If this was not a release, but a transfer as part of a 5250 or other hold could be possible.

    The issue is the law, and the restraint. CA has very specific code sections that cover when and how one can be held against their will through the mental health process. Assuming that the insurance was actually involved, it likely was some form of lawful transfer, but, the way you describe it does not sound legit as this is not the typical means of such transfers.

    EDIT: Okay, I finally located the case decision and applicability of "Roger S." Interesting ... maybe even shady as it does NOT seem to involve hearings for minors UNDER 14, but requires them if the child is 14 or over. The OP in this thread has a child who is already 14 so a hearing would have to be held, and I would be surprised if he would be committed if not already being eligible for a hold pursuant to 5150. Being incorrigable and even violent is not necessarily a mental health issue. It also appears that to commit a child age 14 or older would require a court hearing and counsel. In your case, I assume either your child was under 14 or this occurred and a court approved of the commitment?

    Apparently this is not a commonly used process. It is an interesting option, but, I am not sure I'm comfortable with what appears to be a lack of court oversight at least for children at the younger ages.
    **********
    Retired Cal Cop Sergeant & Teacher

    Seek justice,
    Love mercy,
    Walk humbly with your God

    -- Courageous, by Casting Crowns ... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pkM-gDcmJeM

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