My question involves landlord-tenant law in the State of: Pennsylvania
My family moved out of a house a little over a month ago that we had lived in for 3 years. We allowed a week between moving into our new house and completing our lease at our old house so that we would have a large amount of time to clean it perfectly. We recently received notice from the landlord that she is charging us over $3000 on top of our $1200 deposit due to a long list of mostly bizarre charges. As background, she notified us about 6 months ago that she would be selling the house, and we could either buy it or move, so we opted to move. During the time we lived in the house, the landlady did literally zero maintenance. She had stated that she would powerwash the siding and change filthy carpet on the entry stairs when we moved in, but never did either. When our family room flooded due to a burst pipe, she refused to have an emergency plumber come, and made us wait till the next day for a plumber, so we had to use a shopvac and clean everything up ourselves or risk damage to our property. When our washing machine broke, she refused to reimburse us for laundry while we waited 2 months for her to replace the washer. She lived out of the state. So this was not a good or attentive landlord. The house was built in 1999, and I'm pretty sure everything in the house is exactly as it was when it was built. She had not remodeled anything when we moved in, or even painted. The only reason we stayed in this place 3 years was because we didn't want to move our kids out of the school district, and decent rental housing is scarce in the area since most people own.
When we finally moved out, she agreed to meet my husband the next day for a walkthrough, but then never showed up. My husband and I tried to call, text and email her repeatedly over the next week, but she did not respond to anything.
With all that said, she is now charging us for gems such as $300 to install all new screens in all the windows (HUD estimates that life of window screens is 3-5 years) due to some small holes that we did not create; over $400 to replace a refrigerator door that had 2 small dents; $45 to scrape a piece of gum off the concrete stairs outside; $45 for picking up cigarette butts she claims were in the yard - WE DO NOT SMOKE AND HAVE NOT HAD GUESTS OVER WHO SMOKE; $50 to clean up a "puddle of fresh cat pee" that is physically impossible because we moved our cats a week prior to cleaning the floor in question with a mop, $200 for dents in outdoor vinyl siding (which again, she had done no maintenance on for years and which we are 100% positive we had nothing to do with), $700 to replace all the baseboards in the house (I cleaned these with a toothbrush on my hands and knees for 2 days to make sure they were perfect - though we are not positive she isn't referring to rusty baseboard heaters that were in the house), $200 to repair a crack in the front door that occurred over time from normal use; $50 for 2 new TOILET SEATS (really?); $68 for an old floor lamp that was in the house when we moved in (and that movers accidentally took when we moved, which we texted her about and offered to drop it off at any convenient time - no response) - just on and on, for a grand total of over $4500, so she wants us to send her a check for over $3000.
We have really no idea what to do now beyond asking for detailed receipts of all the charges. But we're really afraid she will take us to small claims court, and they'll figure SOME of the stuff must be true and make us pay this crazy woman at least half of this (there are only a few things on this extensive list that are even close to valid). We have "normal" move out photos, but we certainly didn't go around taking photos of every inch of baseboard or vinyl siding. And the stuff like screens should not even be our responsibility since they were old and damaged from the elements. We've driven by the house, and it looks like they're doing extensive renovations (tearing out cabinets and the like), so it seems to me that she is trying to offset the cost of updating her house for sale by charging us for anything she can think of. Not even sure what I'm asking here except what on earth should we do here? I have tried searching for information specific to Pennsylvania and what is considered wear and tear and specifically whether a landlord must present evidence that the charges she is asking were actually paid to a contractor - or how to defend yourself against outrageous charges like $45 to remove a piece of gum outdoors, but just keep finding info from other states.To clarify - I AM FREAKING OUT HERE.

