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  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2017
    Location
    Delaware, USA
    Posts
    1

    Default How to Separate Yourself from Your Parents When You Turn 18

    Hi, I need serious help. I live in Delaware and I am turning 18 on June 2nd. I officially graduate high school on June 3rd. I'm currently under the impression that once I am 18 I will officially be emancipated. Is this correct? What I want to know is basically how to live afterwards. I have great cause to get away from my parents, but if I choose to leave, I will need to pay for my University of Delaware tuition myself. How will I go about paying for that and indicating that I will be taking out loans and paying for the entire tuition myself? Will I need to reapply? Also, all my savings are under my parents' names in the bank. What will happen to that money? How will I pay for my doctor and dentist appointments, medications, psychiatrist, cell phone bill, etc.? How do I go about getting insurance? Basically, I am asking how will I be able to live on my own? What steps should I take and where should I start? I am completely unprepared to live on my own but it needs to be done for the sake of my mental and even physical health. I have my license but I haven't driven in two years and I need to relearn. I have a place to stay but no job and no car. My parents bought me a classic car that was to be mine but it is not tagged yet and needs a new radiator. What will happen to my belongings? I need someone who is willing to dedicate time to try and help me. Thank you so much for reading.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    Behind a Desk
    Posts
    98,846

    Default Re: How to Separate Yourself from Your Parents When You Turn 18

    Assuming that you are mentally competent, when you turn 18 you can pack up your stuff, say goodbye, and move out. You can't take your parents' stuff.

    When you choose to live independently and support yourself, it's up to you how you do so. A common approach is to get a job. You will schedule your own doctor's appointments and pay your own bills. Anything your parents might contribute would be a gift.

    If you have forgotten how to drive, there are drivers education programs that can reteach you. (Really, though?) Your parents do not have to give you a car, even if they talked about doing so. If they choose to give you a car that doesn't work, it's up to you to fix it.

    For a college student, student loans are available -- or a combination of working and borrowing money -- but you'll need your parents to cooperate with establishing your FAFSA / financial aid eligibility.

    If your money is in your parents' bank account, you can ask them very nicely to give you the money. You can open your own account.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Posts
    1,179

    Default Re: How to Separate Yourself from Your Parents When You Turn 18

    First off I would find a job to bring in some type of income. Second I would speak with the financial aid dept at the university but realize that many kids try to claim the same thing -- parents won't pay, but assets/income taken into account. You may not even be able to get loans through FAFSA if their income/assets are too high **even if none of it is given or shared with you. http://www.finaid.org/otheraid/parentsrefuse.phtml " Unfortunately, current federal law does not provide many options for students who want to go to college but whose parents refuse to help. ...The US Department of Education has published guidance to financial aid administrators indicating that neither parent refusal to contribute to the student's education nor parent unwillingness to provide information on the student aid application or for verification is sufficient grounds for a dependency status override. This is true even if the parents do not claim the student as a dependent for income tax purposes or the student demonstrates total self-sufficiency. "

    Your belongings will be what you can take with you that currently belongs to you, so make smart choices. Don't steal parents' valuables!

    Is your name on the savings account at the bank or is it 100% under your parents' names? If you have no legal ownership on it, then it truly does not belong to you and you will not be able to access it.

    If you want to "separate", there are consequences and you need to consider those. I know, I paid 100% of my own college way although I did get FAFSA because my parents didn't have assets/income.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Mar 2016
    Posts
    2,289

    Default Re: How to Separate Yourself from Your Parents When You Turn 18

    Quote Quoting izzybpb
    View Post
    Hi, I need serious help. I live in Delaware and I am turning 18 on June 2nd. I officially graduate high school on June 3rd. I'm currently under the impression that once I am 18 I will officially be emancipated. Is this correct? What I want to know is basically how to live afterwards. I have great cause to get away from my parents, but if I choose to leave, I will need to pay for my University of Delaware tuition myself. How will I go about paying for that and indicating that I will be taking out loans and paying for the entire tuition myself? Will I need to reapply? Also, all my savings are under my parents' names in the bank. What will happen to that money? How will I pay for my doctor and dentist appointments, medications, psychiatrist, cell phone bill, etc.? How do I go about getting insurance? Basically, I am asking how will I be able to live on my own? What steps should I take and where should I start? I am completely unprepared to live on my own but it needs to be done for the sake of my mental and even physical health. I have my license but I haven't driven in two years and I need to relearn. I have a place to stay but no job and no car. My parents bought me a classic car that was to be mine but it is not tagged yet and needs a new radiator. What will happen to my belongings? I need someone who is willing to dedicate time to try and help me. Thank you so much for reading.
    Wow. Just wow.

    College: Did you ever talk to your counselor at school about college, etc? FAFSA to apply for financial aid (probably too late for the fall) which will tell you if you qualify for grants, loans, etc. It also depends if you're listed as a dependent by your parents on their taxes (which you likely were for taxes just filed) so you'll need their help on that. But if you didn't file for financial aid yet you're pretty well not going to get any. If you already have loans or scholarships, etc, for the 2017 - 2018 year you don't have to do anything. You better prepare for next year.

    Savings: Go take your parents' names off when you turn 18. Nothing happens to the money. It's yours. Unless they go take it out before you take their names off. I took my dad off my accounts after my second deployment and nothing happened.

    Bills: Get a job. That's how you pay for bills. Or find a sugar mama/daddy. You make your own appointments picking up the phone and calling the medical facility applicable. To get insurance depends on the job you get. Some offer insurance. But you better do some research into it because the entire system is likely to change if the GOP passes their healthcare bill. (If it did completely pass I missed it).

    Driving: Go take a class.

    Car: If the title is in your parents' names it's not your car. So that means you better go find a car.

    Belongings: Take whatever your parents let you take.

    You seriously need a life coach. Did you live a sheltered life?

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jun 2014
    Posts
    3,212

    Default Re: How to Separate Yourself from Your Parents When You Turn 18

    Why are you seeing a psychiatrist ?

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Apr 2014
    Posts
    193

    Default Re: How to Separate Yourself from Your Parents When You Turn 18

    It sounds like you missed the opportunity to gain life skills while in high school. The answers above provide the rules that apply to your situation, but not the mechanics which sounds like a big part of your issue. Any major life event like moving out on your own or starting college require preparation to set yourself up for success. You will need a significant amount of CASH to do either. You need to locate and pay for a place to live. You need to answer the transportation issue of how to get around which inevitably takes money. You need furniture, kitchen equipment, food, etc. Most people get a job and save money for these startup and on-going expenses.
    As bad as you think your situation is, I suggest you stay with your parents, get a job, save money like crazy in your own bank account and research on the web/library/school how to do the things you mentioned above and more. Not knowing before you move out will just create worse issues both short term and long term. Then start college in the fall, possibly living on your own or in a dorm which can be a good transition to full independent living.

    Good luck.

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