Right before I filed for divorce I filed a protection order. Mainly to get him out of my apartment which he did before he got served anyway. Actually he didn't get served. So when I did file and had our first court date like a month later (which he didn't show for any of them) I had my lawyer ask the judge if he could rescind the order. He hadn't been served (I don't know why he was at his dad's the whole time and they had the address) and I know he wasn't coming anywhere near me or my daughter because he doesn't put effort into anything except finding drugs.
The judge at my divorce hearing was the judge who issued the order so he rescinded it. She just needs to have her lawyer bring it up at court. If you haven't been served yet then you're not violating anything. You might not get served. But she has to have her lawyer ask the judge to rescind it. But I don't think you can get it dropped until then unless her lawyer can get in contact with the judge before the hearing.
Texas protective orders:
http://www.womenslaw.org/laws_state_...&open_id=11140
If it doesn't get dismissed before the hearing then go to the hearing and yes you can tell the judge "Look we spend time together. I never got served. She doesn't even really want it." You can show there's no danger and she seeks you out.
How is she blackmailing you? You didn't do anything wrong. Let her tell you that crap - you have the chance to go in front of the judge and get that order dismissed. You don't need her to do it.