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  1. #11
    Join Date
    Jan 2015
    Posts
    1,142

    Default Re: What Determines Emotional Abuse

    One of the perks of being an adult is that we get to move away from parents who may be toxic, who've gotten to take out their stresses and angers at life on us because we happened to be their family members. And while we are minors, there's no place to go and no real protection from this. When we become adults, we can get away, we can join the military, we can marry, we can simply move out and restrict our contact with those others who behave in toxic ways toward us.

    You are not your stepfather. You are not married to your mother. And eventually, you can get away. However, you do not sound well enough or able enough or self sufficient enough to do that at this point. That's what you should be angry about, and working to remedy, not that she's the same person she's always been and she's extremely frustrated with you, and she's sharing her feelings with you. Not spending time plotting about having a case against her for mistreating you to be heard in court somewhere.

  2. #12
    Join Date
    Nov 2016
    Posts
    21

    Default Re: What Determines Emotional Abuse

    No because I'm still waiting on that very slow disability process. There don't seem to be any other real options for me to be living in. I'm not necessarily complaining that much about living here, I'm just wondering if I'm being emotionally abused or not and whether I can threaten legal action with any validity.

    I looked up psychological abuse and it seems to align with that. She gaslights me, saying I haven't done anything in the past even though I have. She bullies me because she knows I can't fire back.

    I'll spend my time however I want thank you very much! Well, within my limitations of course.

    So basically, you have to be a child or elderly for illegal emotional abuse to occur? I have severe mental health problems including terrible anxiety. I just read that emotional abuse can cause anxiety, so is it still just legal for her to potentially damage me even further? I think that's pretty reprehensible behavior; bullying a very much disabled vet. I dunno, apparently it's just me that feels that way.

  3. #13
    Join Date
    Jun 2014
    Posts
    3,190

    Default Re: What Determines Emotional Abuse

    A situation being uncomfortable and not pleasant does not mean it is illegal or abuse. If you have not looked for other places to live based on no income. The situation is not that bad. You can't make others do what you want them to because you don't like what they do. If the situation is that bad, there are homeless shelters.

  4. #14
    Join Date
    Nov 2013
    Location
    in alto mare
    Posts
    1,123

    Default Re: What Determines Emotional Abuse

    Quote Quoting Jackson9001
    View Post
    No because I'm still waiting on that very slow disability process. There don't seem to be any other real options for me to be living in. I'm not necessarily complaining that much about living here, I'm just wondering if I'm being emotionally abused or not and whether I can threaten legal action with any validity.

    I looked up psychological abuse and it seems to align with that. She gaslights me, saying I haven't done anything in the past even though I have. She bullies me because she knows I can't fire back.

    I'll spend my time however I want thank you very much! Well, within my limitations of course.

    So basically, you have to be a child or elderly for illegal emotional abuse to occur? I have severe mental health problems including terrible anxiety. I just read that emotional abuse can cause anxiety, so is it still just legal for her to potentially damage me even further? I think that's pretty reprehensible behavior; bullying a very much disabled vet. I dunno, apparently it's just me that feels that way.
    The threshold of what you consider abusive might be very low given your stated symptoms, such that any irritation or discomfort coming from your living situation could be construed as abuse in your opinion. Do you want to force your family to walk on eggshells around you? That is unfair to them and not healthy for you. You need to work on your anxiety and other issues such that you can better deal with life and it's daily problems. There will come a time when your parents no longer around and you will have to live alone or with others. Let's say you were able to sue your parents for abuse- what kind of reaction do you think that will produce and how will you benefit, if at all?

    You need to work on yourself, and your problems and if you are having difficulty getting a disability rating then it may be time to hire an attorney.

  5. #15
    Join Date
    Nov 2016
    Posts
    21

    Default Re: What Determines Emotional Abuse

    Quote Quoting geek
    View Post
    The threshold of what you consider abusive might be very low given your stated symptoms, such that any irritation or discomfort coming from your living situation could be construed as abuse in your opinion. Do you want to force your family to walk on eggshells around you? That is unfair to them and not healthy for you. You need to work on your anxiety and other issues such that you can better deal with life and it's daily problems. There will come a time when your parents no longer around and you will have to live alone or with others. Let's say you were able to sue your parents for abuse- what kind of reaction do you think that will produce and how will you benefit, if at all?

    You need to work on yourself, and your problems and if you are having difficulty getting a disability rating then it may be time to hire an attorney.
    Ok that's a good answer, thanks. I was partially just curious as to the law on this.

  6. #16
    Join Date
    Dec 2016
    Posts
    172

    Default Re: What Determines Emotional Abuse

    Quote Quoting Jackson9001
    View Post
    So basically, you have to be a child or elderly for illegal emotional abuse to occur? I have severe mental health problems including terrible anxiety. I just read that emotional abuse can cause anxiety, so is it still just legal for her to potentially damage me even further? I think that's pretty reprehensible behavior; bullying a very much disabled vet. I dunno, apparently it's just me that feels that way.
    Actually, it's worse than that. emotional abuse, even for children, can be rarely documented. Kids get emotionally abused more than they should.

    Also, emotional abuse is SO SUBJECTIVE. Two people can hear the same thing, and one will feel like it's abusive while the other will not. As such, the litmus test for abuse is extremely high.

    Last, the people who have taken you in have no legal requirement to do so, even if it is your mom. Keep in mind that they could evict you if they decided it was just too much work to deal with your issues. You are an adult, and you have both rights and responsibilities. For example, if you aren't paying rent it is completely reasonable for your mom to expect you to help with yard work whether you want to or not. Yes, you are an adult, but if you are living under her roof and not paying rent, she has a reasonable expectation to expect you to live by her rules.

    On the flip side, you have the right to move out. You could, for example, get a credit card or VA loan, and get your own place. If you aren't well enough to do so, then it makes sense to focus on getting well enough, be thankful for your mom's safety net, and move out as soon as possible.

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