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  1. #11
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Posts
    2,031

    Default Re: Big mess in Virginia

    Quote Quoting aaron
    View Post
    I am not confusing bluntness and rudeness here. I am not interested in arguing about it, either. If you are looking for a kitchen to heat up, try a cooking forum. If you wish to be "blunt" to the point that I perceive you as rude, try somebody else's forum. Thank you.
    Everything I stated is legally accurate. Perhaps I should have included some in my responses to avoid hurting the feelings of the OP??

    If you could perhaps outline what you perceive as "rude", and I will endeavor to abide by your guidelines.

  2. #12
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    Georgia
    Posts
    9

    Thumbs up Re: Big mess in Virginia

    I agree there is a difference between being blunt and being rude and that the line was unnecessarily crossed on some of these posts.

    DL, I feel for you and I know you must be going through hell right now figuring out how to fix this mess. I admire you for trying to help this child out, but you need to be careful how you proceed. You did, however, leave out a key piece of information

    If your son is not in the home where the girl is, and YOU didn't know that she was underage AND the mother has placed her there, I don't think a judge or DCS is going to come after you. I'd keep the son well away from her for the time being (as far as sleeping under the same roof) and make sure they are properly chaperoned if he does happen to be around.

    Whatever your son did in PRIVATE with this girl, you weren't there and you are not responsible. He is, and he'll probably have some legal backlash because of it. However, YOU trying to help both of them AFTER the fact isn't a criminal act, it is attempting to act responsibly under the given set of circumstances. After all, you have a vested interest in the child she is carrying now, regardless of how legal his/her creation was. WE don't PLAN on becoming grandparents and that is out of our control 99.9% of the time. I can't imagine a judge faulting you for that, but you never know, they make crazy decisions once in a while. (I could tell you stories about Virginia's legal system and that's precisely WHY I'm living in Georgia now! LOL)

    The BEST ADVICE you can get is see an attorney IMMEDIATELY to avoid any hint of impropriety on YOUR part. The bottom line is that you are an innocent bystander in the mess your SON created. Don't allow yourself to become a victim by not knowing your legal rights/obligations.

    God Bless and keep us posted on how things go for you.

  3. #13
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    California
    Posts
    20,594

    Default Re: Big mess in Virginia

    At this point, it would appear that your son has committed statutory rape (as it is called in my state). That is, he has had sexual relations with a minor under the age of consent which is 18 in VA. His stepping up to the plate and "doing the right thing" may, or it may not, have any effect with the potential criminal charges. I know that in my state it varies by county whether they would do anything if they got married.

    When she turns 16 the girl can TRY to get emancipated.

    § 16.1-331. Petition for emancipation.

    Any minor who has reached his sixteenth birthday and is residing in this Commonwealth, or any parent or guardian of such minor, may petition the juvenile and domestic relations district court for the county or city in which either the minor or his parents or guardian resides for a determination that the minor named in the petition be emancipated. The petition shall contain, in addition to the information required by § 16.1-262, the gender of the minor and, if the petitioner is not the minor, the name of the petitioner and the relationship of the petitioner to the minor.

    § 16.1-332. Orders of court; investigation, report and appointment of counsel.

    If deemed appropriate the court may (i) require the local department of welfare or social services or any other agency or person to investigate the allegations in the petition and file a report of that investigation with the court, (ii) appoint counsel for the minor's parents or guardian, or (iii) make any other orders regarding the matter which the court deems appropriate. In any case pursuant to this article the court shall appoint counsel for the minor to serve as guardian ad litem.

    § 16.1-333. Findings necessary to order that minor is emancipated.

    The court may enter an order declaring the minor emancipated if, after a hearing, it is found that: (i) the minor has entered into a valid marriage, whether or not that marriage has been terminated by dissolution; or (ii) the minor is on active duty with any of the armed forces of the United States of America; or (iii) the minor willingly lives separate and apart from his parents or guardian, with the consent or acquiescence of the parents or guardian, and that the minor is or is capable of supporting himself and competently managing his own financial affairs.


    Experience has told me that this is rare, and it is unlikely. If she has a mother or a father capable of caring for her, emancipation is unlikely. And if mom or dad can NOT care for her, it is always possible the state will take her in. It is very doubtful that the state would allow the boyfriend or his parents to be her guardians.

    She can ask to get married, but she will need consent of both legal guardians. So, if dad has ANY physical or legal responsibility, and he opposes the marriage, it won't happen.

    At this point it would seem that there is a lot that is up in the air. It would not seem the most prudent course of action to take in the pregnant minor of your son as that COULD leave you open to criminal accusations and civil liability.

    Consider also that this girl lied about her age ... what else might she be lying about? Is her mother really as bad off as she says? Do you know mom? Is dad really a parolee? Heck, is she really pregnant? There could be more to this than you know.

    - Carl

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