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  1. #11
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    Oct 2016
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    Default Re: Can a Stepfather Be Legally Charged with Visitation Interference

    Quote Quoting free9man
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    Sounds to me like your wife married a bully. Probably why she is sitting back on it. Take her back to court so she can be reminded how it is supposed to be. Expect years of this behavior, and possibly lots of trips to court, if she doesn't ditch him.
    Yes. She honestly believes that since she married him, HE is the one who runs everything. He has even told her such things as once they got married, he effectively overrode any court order. Naturally, she believes him. She and I will be returning to court soon, so as to HOPEFULLY get back to dealing with just her on this issue of the kids. I plan on showing the judge his video recorded behavior. Like I said earlier, I would LIKE very much for him to be fined, or to have some sort of consequence levied against him. But, it's looking like my ex-wife will have to be the one to face the music, since this is her legal responsibility.

  2. #12
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    Jul 2010
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    7,860

    Default Re: Can a Stepfather Be Legally Charged with Visitation Interference

    Quote Quoting McKay
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    Like I said earlier, I would LIKE very much for him to be fined, or to have some sort of consequence levied against him. But, it's looking like my ex-wife will have to be the one to face the music, since this is her legal responsibility.
    Unfortunately, he's not a party to the custody order so there isn't much the court can do to him. Any fines/consequences would be on your ex.

  3. #13
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
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    Somewhere near Canada
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    Default Re: Can a Stepfather Be Legally Charged with Visitation Interference

    Quote Quoting McKay
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    My ex and I have joint legal custody. It is a 60/40 split. The children spend weekdays with my ex-wife and every weekend (which is extended to include a good portion of Friday and Monday) with me. However, her new husband is blatantly interfering with this. He is the one dropping the children off and picking them up, even though he is NOT the one I am supposed to be dealing with. He said that "something came up" a few weeks back, and would not say what that "something" that "came up" was. Slightly suspicious. I did not get them at all that weekend. If something does legitimately come up, then makeup arrangements MUST be made. He informed me "I will get back to you on that". He is also dropping them off late and picking them up early. The last time that I informed him that he was in violation of the law by interfering with my LEGAL visitation rights, he informed me that he had more rights than I do. I am NO lawyer, but I do know that in Alabama, stepparents do NOT trump biological parents UNLESS the stepparent has legally adopted the children, which obviously has NOT happened and will NOT ever, under ANY circumstances, happen in this case. I would like to have him charged with violating a court order, but I am not sure if he will be the one to suffer any consequences since this is my ex-wife's legal responsibility. At any rate, at least one of them is in some trouble, and honestly, I prefer that it be him. Also, I would like to add that the arrangement was working fine and my ex-wife was following the order to the T. Then she met this guy, married him, and that is when everything changed.
    This is what I meant. Don't tell him anything at all. He's not party to your custody order, and you're wasting your time and effort in trying to tell him anything. Don't engage; don't let him think he's part of the equation. By reacting to him, you're playing into his silly beliefs.

    (Yes, there's an added - albeit passive-aggressive - bonus ... you're essentially trivializing his entire existence as it pertains to your custody matters. Bullies cannot stand being ignored)

    You'll give him the impression that his opinion is worthless. He can't get to you, hence he's ineffective.
    An intelligent hell would be better than a stupid paradise - Victor Hugo

    Do not microwave grapes

  4. #14
    Join Date
    Dec 2013
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    835

    Default Re: Can a Stepfather Be Legally Charged with Visitation Interference

    Would he be able to request that the step father not be the one to drop the child off? I am not sure if that is something that would even be considered or not, but the other volunteers who have much more experience with this then I do, will probably know the answer.

    OP, You should definitely try and get the orders changed so that you pick up the children when it is your time. And if he keeps coming early to get them back, there is nothing that says you need to give them to him early.

  5. #15
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    Apr 2009
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    Default Re: Can a Stepfather Be Legally Charged with Visitation Interference

    Quote Quoting readytoleave
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    Would he be able to request that the step father not be the one to drop the child off? I am not sure if that is something that would even be considered or not, but the other volunteers who have much more experience with this then I do, will probably know the answer.

    OP, You should definitely try and get the orders changed so that you pick up the children when it is your time. And if he keeps coming early to get them back, there is nothing that says you need to give them to him early.
    He could, but in my very humble opinion that all too often leads to trouble. Either parent should be able to designate a third party to conduct pick-up and drop-off, because unfortunately too many parents will use the "dad and Mom must pickup" as an excuse to say "Oh .. well .. the court order doesn't say I have to let the kids go with your new girlfriend so they're not".

    If the parents are sensible it works beautifully ... but then again, if the parents were sensible we'd have no need for forums like this.
    An intelligent hell would be better than a stupid paradise - Victor Hugo

    Do not microwave grapes

  6. #16
    Join Date
    Oct 2016
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    18

    Default Re: Can a Stepfather Be Legally Charged with Visitation Interference

    That's what I figured. Sigh....Oh well, maybe if she gets punished, she will wake up and smell the coffee. The thing is, the guy is not mean to the kids or anything. In fact, he doesn't even really interact with them. He will tell them some outlandish stories about himself here and there, but that's about it.

  7. #17
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
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    Officially across the country from where I've been all my life
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    4,494

    Default Re: Can a Stepfather Be Legally Charged with Visitation Interference

    What I think needs to happen is take all the proof of his involvement (including those videos or whatever), take them to court and ask for a no third party interference order. That IS possible.

  8. #18
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    Oct 2016
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    18

    Default Re: Can a Stepfather Be Legally Charged with Visitation Interference

    Quote Quoting CourtClerk
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    What I think needs to happen is take all the proof of his involvement (including those videos or whatever), take them to court and ask for a no third party interference order. That IS possible.
    Thank you! If a no third party interference order is in place, then could he get into legal trouble if he violates it?

  9. #19
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
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    Officially across the country from where I've been all my life
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    Default Re: Can a Stepfather Be Legally Charged with Visitation Interference

    Quote Quoting McKay
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    Thank you! If a no third party interference order is in place, then could he get into legal trouble if he violates it?
    No. Your ex wife would.

  10. #20
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
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    16,091

    Default Re: Can a Stepfather Be Legally Charged with Visitation Interference

    Quote Quoting McKay
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    That's what I figured. Sigh....Oh well, maybe if she gets punished, she will wake up and smell the coffee. The thing is, the guy is not mean to the kids or anything. In fact, he doesn't even really interact with them. He will tell them some outlandish stories about himself here and there, but that's about it.
    I am coming into this late, but I wanted to comment on one issue. If you get every weekend (which is a really unusual order since judges normally feel that children need weekend time with both parents) where do you expect makeup time to come from?

    Also, in the meantime, you cannot do anything about him dropping off the children late (until the court punishes mom) but you can do something about him picking up the children early. You can simply refuse to turn the children over to him until the time designated in the order.

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