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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jul 2016

    Default My Father Won't Repay a Loan

    Hi, this might be the wrong place to post this but...

    I'm 21 years old, I was born with an amputation of my right foot. Although I had always been in pain, I could still go to school, enjoy a social life with friends and lived very much a normal life. In 2012, I had an operation (I'm not sure what it's called but it was a huge frame) to extend the bone in my right leg as it was about 9 cm smaller than my left leg which caused me to limp heavily and also gave me scoliosis. The operation took 9 months and going off its intention, it worked fine as it extended the right leg by 6.5 cm. Shortly after that, I could not walk without an excruciating amount of pain. The little bone that I have on my right foot (it looks like a little toe) also extended to which I was literally walking on it. For comparison, it's like walking on your little finger. Fast forward 4 years and I still can't walk without pain, I can't even bear pressure on the foot unless I have my prosthesis on. I couldn't leave my house, I couldn't get a job, I developed depression, severe anxiety, I'm still living with my parents, I haven't seen 1 single friend since 2012 and I'm on a low rate benefit system which gives me about 50 a week. After a long time thinking, I decided to have the right bone amputated 1 month ago and as of now I'm recovering from the surgery.

    My beautiful mum saved up 5000 of my disability money for me and gave it to me after my 18th birthday. My dad was going through a bad patch and had asked many people to lend him 1000 to decorate the house. Not one person lent him anything. He then asked me as a last resort and I put the money in his hand there and then. He told me once he gets his tax rebate he'd pay me it back and we got on with our lives.

    I have asked him about 3 times for that money back over the course of 3 years. The first time he again said he'd pay it back after he gets his rebate. He got his rebate and didn't give me a penny. I didn't ask him for a long time because, well, he's my father and I love him. And I didn't necessarily need it as I wasn't leaving the house or buying new clothes etc. - I also still had the rest of the money to keep me afloat.

    The money has now run out and I asked my dad for the money again 2 months ago. His reply straight away was "you have got to start paying rent". He has never asked me for rent. Never. After talking about it we finally settled on him giving me back 50 a week and he gave me 50 right there. He hasn't paid me a single penny since.

    Today, I asked him for the money. He said "you've got to start paying rent". Within those 2 months he didn't ask a single time for the rent. I don't know what to do. I feel so let down and I feel like he's done such an immoral thing but at the same time, he has every right to ask me for rent. It's his house. He's always been a very selfish and self-centred man but for me this is a potential relationship ender.

    What do I do? I've gotta be honest and say I haven't lived in the real world for 5 years so maybe I'm being pathetic. Is it normal for disabled non-workers to pay their parents rent? The hardest thing to take is that he happily took that money which I earned through literally being disabled and won't pay it back because I don't pay rent.

    Any advice would be truly appreciated. Thank you for reading.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2006

    Default Re: Immoral

    Unfortunately, this is primarily a US board and the law in the US and the UK is not the same. I don't know how much help we will be able to be.

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