My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Arkansas. I am a step parent of a child whom seems to have a few emotional issues. My SC is scared to talk to her mom about certain things and has asked me to sign her up to speak to someone to help her express her feelings and be herself at all times. I filled her dad in on everything she shares with me and has started a self-help journal for her. Dad has spoken to mom in hopes of mom understanding how important open communication and quality time is with her daughter. The daughter comes home complaining of how now she realizes that it was not because of moms schooling nor job that she doesn't spend quality time with her, because mom now has a boyfriend whom she spends plenty of time with. I as well as dad encourage her to communicate with mom, but she is scared because she says mom shuts her down. Is there anything we can do regarding this issue?
My step daughter is involved in educational and extracurricular activities, in which mom will not allow her to participate in unless mom feels like taking her. Mom states her time with her daughter is her time and she spends it how she feels. Mom has daughter at least one day of the week (mom picks whatever day she wishes each week), every other weekend and during the summer. This creates not much stability when it comes to activities because the day in which mom exercises her weekday visitation varies. We have other children whom participate in activities and my SC feels left out and wonders why mom cannot get her a day during the week in which she does not have practice. Mom will state she will take the child to certain events, but if she has a conversation with dad and gets upset she doesn't allow daughter to attend particular events. We have expressed to her that mom gets her on whatever day she is off and to communicate her feelings to mom. My SC is very smart and knows mom is off multiple days during the week other than her 2 practice days. Is there anything we can do?
Another thing, Mom tells daughter that I am not her mother and my children are not her siblings or of any kin to her. Because my SC has strong feelings for us and we have been in her life since Kindergarten, this has caused some confusion and animosity towards her birth mom. She has expressed to us that mom does not care for us and say mean things about us. We promote positive relationships and raise her to know that no one can tell her how to feel; she should be in control of her feelings. She continued to tell us that mom has instructed her not to call me mom and that bothers her because she likes calling me mom. I would not and am not trying to take her mother’s place and know it must be difficult for her birth mom to have another woman in her daughter’s life, but I refuse to not treat her life I treat other children.
Do you have any advice for us?

