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  1. #21
    Join Date
    Jan 2015
    Posts
    1,142

    Default Re: Remarrying After a Possibly Bigamous Marriage

    In my years of working with people, trying to obtain specific information to certify them for programs and take claims for benefits from them, I ran into a great many people who did not have the official paperwork. People move, lose things, never get it, have fires, floods or natural disasters.

    I have helped a great many people obtain paperwork, documentation, etc. People who claim to have very bad memory lapses and can't even tell you what year it was, much less what month, we always tried to lead through with cues, such as "was it cold or hot?" "In the springtime or the fall?" "How old was your child?" and usually we can bring up some memories to build from. I've even had to tell people I really doubt they had their child, got married, or worked at that place in THAT year, because based on their birthdate, they were eight years old at the time!

    I did not tell the OP she WAS lying, I said if she continues to assert that she cannot even remember when her divorce was finalized, year or month, she's probably lying. That conclusion is based on my experience with taking documentation for records. And if I were a county clerk she told this to while trying to get a marriage license under these circumstances, I'd ask her for the papers before I issued the marriage license for sure.

    Officials who hear a story like "Oh gosh, I can't remember anything!" in lieu of paperwork are going to jump to a certain conclusion, whether she likes it or not.

  2. #22
    Join Date
    Sep 2015
    Posts
    12

    Default Re: Remarrying After a Possibly Bigamous Marriage

    Dear All,

    I need to first apologize to you for my reaction. I was totally out of line and you were trying to help me. My response to that help was just wrong and I do offer you my sincerest apologies.

    I took your advice and I pursued this issue with a vengeance. As the result of your encouragement and actually your kicking my butt, I got to the truth.

    I received a call from the clerk about 10 minutes ago and my divorce was final on September 18th, 1969. He even gave me the name of the Judge that presided.

    Thanks for confronting me to "dig for the truth" and I am truly sorry that I was not very nice.

    Regards....

    - - - Updated - - -

    What created a problem for me is that this divorce was finalized in my home town. I remembered the lawyer that I engaged, but when I contacted the office, the admin could not find the file. I even asked my Mom about working with the lawyer as this was a family attorney and Mom recommended him. But, I give props to the clerk that was diligent in looking for this file. When I first talked with him, he said he could not find anything. But, 2 days later, he did what I think was over and beyond, "he kept looking". And, he finally found my case. He said these old cases are often difficult to find. The issue was I was still living in another city, while the divorce proceedings took place in my hometown. My lawyer represented me in court. I never went to court.

    Again, thanks for you assistance.

    Respectfully....
    DeGarthy

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