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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Aug 2015
    Location
    California
    Posts
    4

    Default What Happens When Parents Disagree Over Living Overseas

    My question involves a child custody case from the State of: California.

    Hi, my family and I came to United States 9 months ago
    with a green card, which I won.

    In our country, I have a good job, but we decided that in the US we will
    find a better job and a life.

    When we came to California we found that this is not true.
    I didn't received a proposal for an interview, even after dozens of job applications.
    For a 7 months I work low-paid job so we can pay our
    rent and expenses.
    My wife still could not find job.

    In my country, my employer has promised to keep my work place for a certain period.
    Now this deadline came and if I don't go back, then I will stay without work there.
    That is why I decided that it makes no sense to keep trying here
    but to go back in our country. I bought airline tickets for the whole family.

    My wife, however, is determined to remain to live in the United States although no job.
    Also she wants to keep our son, who is 7 years old, here in US.
    I want him to live with me in our country, where I will try to give him a good education and life.
    Until the date of departure we have only two weeks.
    We are not divorced

    What should I do?
    Please help.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Somewhere near Canada
    Posts
    35,894

    Default Re: Green Card Holder - Child Custody

    The US cannot stop you from leaving with your son, but likewise, they cannot stop your wife from keeping your son from you either.

    You can file for divorce in California and request temporary custody but doing so also puts an immediate restraining order on both of you preventing the child from being moved out of California. It also means that you're submitting to California having jurisdiction over the whole matter.

    What is your real goal here? Are you asking if you should get divorced? Whether you should just leave?

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Aug 2015
    Location
    California
    Posts
    4

    Default Re: Green Card Holder - Child Custody

    Thanks for your answer!
    My goal is to take my son with me in his homeland, where I can provide him our own home, a good education and life.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jun 2014
    Posts
    3,212

    Default Re: Green Card Holder - Child Custody

    And how do you think your son will.feel.when he finds out what you did? Taking and keeping a child from either parent is never good for the child.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Somewhere near Canada
    Posts
    35,894

    Default Re: Green Card Holder - Child Custody

    Quote Quoting viktor2
    View Post
    Thanks for your answer!
    My goal is to take my son with me in his homeland, where I can provide him our own home, a good education and life.
    You really, really need an attorney for this. Your status is obviously in jeopardy, and while you and Mom currently stand equal before the court in the US there's a very strong chance that Mom will get custody.

    It is not impossible for a person who has no legal status to get custody of their dual-citizen child. There is a very high profile case going on at the moment where the Daddy, who was here on a visa, got custody of his two children and was allowed to relocate them to Europe (where he lives and is a citizen... he's German, the children are German/American and they now live in Monaco and France, as allowed by a California court). Of course in his case the mother (and I have to use that term loosely) did everything in her power to alienate him and make sure he never saw his children again. That backfired massively.

    So... ultimately, you want an attorney. Now.

    - - - Updated - - -

    Quote Quoting Mercy&Grace
    View Post
    And how do you think your son will.feel.when he finds out what you did? Taking and keeping a child from either parent is never good for the child.
    Finds out what he did? This is no different from any custody case except for the distance involved. Do we admonish American parents who live in different states like this?

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jun 2014
    Posts
    3,212

    Default Re: Green Card Holder - Child Custody

    Traveling from one state to another isn't the same as traveling from one country to another. Does Mom have the finances to travel back and forth and for the child to travel back and forth. Its got nothing to do with legality. If Dad wants Mom out of the child life, in the end the child may chose to.be out of his life.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Somewhere near Canada
    Posts
    35,894

    Default Re: Green Card Holder - Child Custody

    Quote Quoting Mercy&Grace
    View Post
    Traveling from one state to another isn't the same as traveling from one country to another. Does Mom have the finances to travel back and forth and for the child to travel back and forth. Its got nothing to do with legality. If Dad wants Mom out of the child life, in the end the child may chose to.be out of his life.
    Is there a reason for the bias against parents who wish to raise their child in their home country? I see no such bias when discussing parents who live, for example, in Florida and Hawaii. Or parents who have to deal with military moves. Why is that?

    You're the only person who mentioned keeping one parent out of the child's life. The OP certainly didn't indicate that.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jun 2014
    Posts
    3,212

    Default Re: Green Card Holder - Child Custody

    The OP didn't mention anything about Mom and child if he takes the child to his country. Maybe he's trying to force Mom to go back by saying he will take their child.

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Somewhere near Canada
    Posts
    35,894

    Default Re: Green Card Holder - Child Custody

    Quote Quoting Mercy&Grace
    View Post
    The OP didn't mention anything about Mom and child if he takes the child to his country. Maybe he's trying to force Mom to go back by saying he will take their child.
    And maybe you're reading things that aren't actually there.

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Posts
    1,695

    Default Re: What Happens When Parents Disagree Over Living Overseas

    It is sad that your American dream did not work out. There may be reasons your wife's has. If you are from a country where women have few rights and freedoms, you can certainly understand why she wants to stay.

    And, don't judge the country by California. I would not live there for any amount of money. It is the Midwest for me!

    You can certainly return home, but do it the legal way. If you child must stay, do be it.

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