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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Aug 2012
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    7

    Arrow Consequences of Consenting to Stepparent Adoption

    My question involves adoption law for the State of: California

    My Husband has a 17 year old Son, as the result of a one-night stand. He has never had much of a relationship with him. He has joint legal custody and pays child support. The Mother has full physical and joint legal custody, and never cared if there was a relationship between the Father and Son. Her only concern was child support, and has taken my Husband back to court several times to raise the amount.

    The Mother had a Marriage ceremony 15+ years ago, but was never legally Married. They have 5 kids of their own. The Step-Father has been the Father figure to the Son for most of his life. My Husband asked them 15 years ago if the Step-Father wanted to adopt the Son, but they did not. My Husband thinks this was only due to the child support they would lose.

    Just recently, they asked my Husband if the Step-Father could adopt the Son. We are wondering why, after 17+ years and the Son is almost an adult. We were given a vague answer, but we were told that their other 5 children are eligible for College tuition of some kind, and that the Son is not. If the Son is adopted, then he would be eligible.

    This seemed suspicious to my Husband and I. It seems odd that the Mother would be fine with losing the child support she has been getting.

    They told us that if my Husband did not sign his rights away, they would pursue getting the adoption done without his consent.

    Are there any pitfalls to my Husband giving up his rights?

    He says he is only willing to sign-off on it if child support ceases immediately. Does that take long in an adoption case?

    Any insights are helpful.

    Thank you.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
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    Behind a Desk
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    98,846

    Default Re: Consequences of Consenting to Stepparent Adoption

    Your husband would lose his rights as a parent, but that would have little significance after the age of 18. Your husband would have to explicitly include his son in his estate plan if he wanted to be sure that his son was going to inherit, down the road.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Mar 2013
    Posts
    18,340

    Default Re: Consequences of Consenting to Stepparent Adoption

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    Just recently, they asked my Husband if the Step-Father could adopt the Son. We are wondering why, after 17+ years and the Son is almost an adult. We were given a vague answer, but we were told that their other 5 children are eligible for College tuition of some kind, and that the Son is not. If the Son is adopted, then he would be eligible.

    This seemed suspicious to my Husband and I. It seems odd that the Mother would be fine with losing the child support she has been getting.

    They told us that if my Husband did not sign his rights away, they would pursue getting the adoption done without his consent.

    Are there any pitfalls to my Husband giving up his rights?

    He says he is only willing to sign-off on it if child support ceases immediately. Does that take long in an adoption case?
    Nothing "suspicious" about it. My guess is that 4 years worth of college tuition is worth a lot more than the remaining months of child support between now and the boy's 18th birthday. And it's likely that it will take a few months to put the tuition aid in place if the boy is starting college in the fall, which is just a couple of months away.

    The adoption will stop the child support on the effective date of the adoption but if the child support is taken out of your husband's pay or goes through the state or the courts he'd better do some advance planning to make sure the deductions stop on time. Otherwise he isn't likely to get that money back.

    But if he just sends monthly checks to his ex, he can simply stop sending them once the adoption is effective.

    If your husband has had any kind of relationship with his son until now that isn't likely to change in the future and being adopted by a stepparent shouldn't prevent the son from continuing the relationship with his bio father.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
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    Somewhere near Canada
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    35,894

    Default Re: Consequences of Consenting to Stepparent Adoption

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    My question involves adoption law for the State of: California

    My Husband has a 17 year old Son, as the result of a one-night stand. He has never had much of a relationship with him. He has joint legal custody and pays child support. The Mother has full physical and joint legal custody, and never cared if there was a relationship between the Father and Son. Her only concern was child support, and has taken my Husband back to court several times to raise the amount.

    The Mother had a Marriage ceremony 15+ years ago, but was never legally Married. They have 5 kids of their own. The Step-Father has been the Father figure to the Son for most of his life. My Husband asked them 15 years ago if the Step-Father wanted to adopt the Son, but they did not. My Husband thinks this was only due to the child support they would lose.

    Just recently, they asked my Husband if the Step-Father could adopt the Son. We are wondering why, after 17+ years and the Son is almost an adult. We were given a vague answer, but we were told that their other 5 children are eligible for College tuition of some kind, and that the Son is not. If the Son is adopted, then he would be eligible.

    This seemed suspicious to my Husband and I. It seems odd that the Mother would be fine with losing the child support she has been getting.

    They told us that if my Husband did not sign his rights away, they would pursue getting the adoption done without his consent.

    Are there any pitfalls to my Husband giving up his rights?

    He says he is only willing to sign-off on it if child support ceases immediately. Does that take long in an adoption case?

    Any insights are helpful.

    Thank you.
    Oh that's really easy to answer.

    15 years ago Mom decided - quite rightly - that she'd like her son's father supported the child he made with her. It was also right and proper to have the amount modified (raised, in Dad's case). Now? She'd like to make official the relationship between her son and the man who has actually acted as father all this time.

    Does it have everything to do with child support? Unlikely.
    Does it have something to do with child support? Without a doubt.

    Either way, it doesn't matter if your husband is suspicious. His obligation is a simple one, and should the adoption go ahead, he'll no longer have that obligation.

    (Though if he owes arrears they won't necessarily disappear and definitely not if he owes the state)

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