How to Protect Yourself When Drugs Are Being Done Under the Same Roof

[baurman]

I am looking for advice on how to protect myself from this absurd situation that I am in. I don't do any drugs whatsoever and have a career and no criminal record. I have a lot of valuables in my room that I fear will be confiscated because the issue is my brother who is over the age of 18, has no care about his life and actions of doing hard drugs in his room all day, every day, abusing alcohol and vicodin and doing cocaine and damaging the house to the point his excuse is he will not remember anything he did.

I fear that one day there will be a search warrant and cops will find drugs in his room and I will get arrested because I am living under this roof. What are my rights on this? How can I protect myself that I am not involved with what illegal activities another person is doing in the other room?

I have already been thinking about moving out because my mom won't do anything to fix the problem and still allows him to grow without consequence. But moving out for me isn't something I can do within a month, that could take up to 6 months for me to pack up everything, find a new place, etc. So I am looking for a short term solution that can be done within the next month. I have already talked to my mom about everything and told her the house will get seized and her response was she doesn't want to deal with him because he will throw a tantrum and bust the house up. Then when I told her to call the cops on him, her response was "I don't want to bail him out and hire a lawyer." I told her then just let him go to a drug abuse program so he can get better, and she says "Why is it my job to check him in? He's over 18. He should check him in himself." - She always gives me excuses for everything so she doesn't have to deal with anything even though it's being done under HER roof.

I try to bring her down to reality and say if this house gets raided and they find drugs and growing in this house - SHE will get arrested as well as everybody else and we will lose our jobs. I am seeking advice on if you were in my situation, what can I do? What are my rights? I've tried talking to her and bringing her down to reality but she just says she doesn't care. I told her that if she loves us then why would she rather just let him kill himself with drugs and bring everyone else down without getting treatment? Any help on this matter I would greatly appreciate some input. Thanks in advance!

[Ohiogal]

Call the police and report your brother for his illegal actions. Your mother may very well lose her house.

[adjusterjack]

Your mother is an "enabler." Google that if you don't know what it means. She's as much of an addict as your brother is, although not to drugs. She's an addict to complacency.

NOTHING will ever change at your house unless you step up and call the police regardless of the consequences.

[comment/ator]

Did you mention if you were over 18 yourself? If I were you, I'd be getting my stuff together so that the six months you need to get your stuff together to move out will begin now, and you can get away from this situation. Your mom is going to end up sitting there with just druggie boy, but in the meantime, it sounds as though you are, to some extent, also living off her and using her electricity, premises, and facilities yourself. Just because you don't use drugs doesn't mean you have the right to demand that she fix the situation in her house as you would prefer. So get away, get your own, as soon as possible, and you won't have to angst any more about what happens when they come after your brother.

[baurman]

Yes. I am 23. I am living off her because I am saving up money in order to get my own place. Right now I only have about 8k in my savings. So my goal was to save up about 20k to where I can move out on my own and have enough emergency funds. But now that is cut short because of this issue. I don't know what else I could do besides moving out - which was supposed to be my worst case scenario - due to the fact that I was trying to save up my money without having to pay rent so I can have more emergency funds but now this is a problem that is forcing me to move away extremely soon. I have already asked my friends for advice and I told them I just want to go to the police and report it to them but then I would be a "Snitch" and that I won't have a house to come back to and that I would be reporting my Mom as well and her house would be Seized and they all tell me "How would you feel knowing that you won't have a house to be in and be a snitch?" That's why I feel like I just want to GET THROUGH her head... But I've already had a long talk with her and still she's doing nothing. She prefers to yell at me about using the Electricity and Putting my dishes away instead of focusing on the real issues. She thinks that I use up all the electricity by using the A/C and she doesn't bat an eye that maybe the Heat Lamps and the Fans running 24/7 for his growing doesn't take up electricity.


If I call the police and make a report on this, wouldn't I already have to find another place to live because if they come and find drugs, wouldn't all my valuables in my room be seized? It seems like the immediate actions I have to take are move all of my stuff out - possibly into a storage for short term - and then find another place.. Because if I report this to the police then I won't have a house to come back to. Shouldn't this be the worst case scenario? Are there other things I can do before going this route? Maybe just talk to a counselor or lawyer and see how I can protect my Valuables and my things? NO matter what I tell my mom, she is never going to change because she is too scared and protective of my brother and allows him to do all of this even if I tell her that she will lose her job and get arrested, she just tells me she doesn't care and it's disappointing to me that she is willing to risk everything she has ever worked for, for this.

[cbg]

In what state is this?

[cdwjava]

It does not stand to reason that if your brother gets arrested for being under the influence or being in possession of drugs that YOUR stuff will somehow be seized. About the only way you run the risk of law enforcement seizing your stuff might be if a joint task force discovers that the house is being used to facilitate sales and/or drug use and that part of the proceeds have gone to helping maintain or pay for the property. Even then, it'd be a long shot. Such is not the typical scenario.

But, if you report your brother and he gets popped, it could make living with him difficult and it could cause mom to toss you out on your ear. Best to move out now before something bad happens or you get swept up in a drug raid if and/or when your brother gets popped.

[baurman]

I just want him to better himself and it seems the only way that is possible right now is getting him arrested, even though his mom doesn't want that happening because her excuse is "I don't want to bail him out, go to court, and hire a lawyer" but she rather not do that and allow him to do drugs to kill himself? makes no sense to me. He has never been arrested before so he thinks he is untouchable doing all of these activities. And it's not because I want to see him suffer. I want to see him corrected and stop using drugs and sees how badly it hurts everyone around him instead of being selfish and bringing everyone around him down. I want to do what is best for him and see his life turn around, get a job, get hobbies besides what he does all day, every day. But I don't want to see my mom suffer and lose her house and get arrested because I called the cops on them and reported them. That's why I am seeking other options. I will be moving out but I know that is not going to solve the issue. That is just going to erase them from my life. Is it possible that if I reported him, they would just arrest HIM and take him away without anyone else involved and see that it is because we are trying to help him?

[cdwjava]

Anything is POSSIBLE, but no one can say what WILL happen.

The odds of mom losing her house if he is a user is slim to none. But, if he is engaged in dealing/manufacturing, then that would increase the likelihood of some form of seizure. A lot also depends on the state you are in. What state ARE you in?

[baurman]

California.