My question involves a child custody case from the State of: New York
I want to file a request with the Family Court for full custody, but want to file a request for child support at a later date.
My Ex and I have had 50-50 shared custody of our 19 year old since our divorce 9 years ago.
Fifteen months ago, he asked me to file for full custody to get him away from his mother and stepfather. ( His 21 year old brother moved in with me full time at age 15 to get away from her ) The case was postponed, but that day she said he could live with me full time. I withdrew the motion . But now I need full custody so that I can have full decision making without her interference. I will want her to contribute to his expenses, which have increased by $1200/mos for psychiatric and psychological services.
Our agreement requires that we communicate regarding matters of health and education. She has a pattern of being hostile whenever there is something to discuss, and now sent me an email that she will only discuss issues directly with my son and does not want me to communicate with her. He has some severe emotional problems which resulted in his inability to stay in college and is essentially home-bound, unable to work and needing frequent advice and support. He has a weekly psychiatrist, has added a psychologist weekly for CBT therapy, and will be undergoing additional neuropsychological testing. He will be trying to return to college in the fall and will need a variety of support services.
It is necessary for his parents to be involved in the therapies and to help him with planning, services, etc. I am the only one who participates with his therapists. Now that she is refusing to communicate with me on these issues ( and said so in writing) I would like to have full custody so that I can make decisions with him without the requirement of checking with her, and without her being able to sabotage this by unilateral contradicting my guidance for spite.
I think this is a clear cut case where shared custody is impossible, so I expect to easily get full custody. (am I wrong?)
Can I apply for full custody now and postpone requesting child support to a later date? ( our agreement had me paying child support but said that child support would end if he "establishes a permanent residence away from the mother." I stopped paying when his mother agreed in writing that he had established the permanent residence with me.)
I have 2 reasons for wanting to do this in 2 steps. First is that I want to get full custody ASAP, and I think I can go to family court without the expense of a lawyer since this seems straight forward. I think I should have a lawyer to the request for child support, because her attorney will argue against it. Second, in a few months, she will be receiving $250,000 lump sum paid out of a trust fund I am inheriting. That will change her financial picture. Third, he recently started additional therapy raising his monthly out of pocket costs to $1200 per month. It will take time to put together the justifications for requesting child support, so that her attorney will not succeed in blocking it because I have a much large income than hers.
( last year I posted a thread about asking for emergency custody for a potentially suicidal child. Those interested in seeing this as an ongoing saga may wish to read it)