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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Apr 2015
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    8

    Default Abuse Report After Discipline Left Bruises

    My question involves child abuse or neglect in the State of: Florida

    My husband is being accused of child abuse by my daughter's biological father.. He spanked her with a belt and it left bruises and DCF said they don't think it was done intentionally and there has never beens complaints before but it left bruises this time so he took it to far they was suppose to get someone in our house so she could come back but the dad got a restoring order on my husband and he has to go to court so they won't allow her in the home with him here. I feel like I have to choose my child or my husband unless someone can help us figure out what to do.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    California
    Posts
    20,594

    Default Re: Lies

    First off, what was he thinking smacking your daughter with a belt!? In FL, corporal injury to a child "by a parent or legal custodian" (which stepdad may not be) does not in itself constitute abuse when it does not result in harm to the child. However, since it left bruises, it does appear that it did exceed the purpose of the law ... and, it is arguable whether he had any lawful right to physically discipline the child in the first place. How old is your daughter?

    Your husband could also be facing criminal charges for his actions. He should immediately speak to an attorney.

    And, yes, you may have to choose between your child and your husband - at least for the short run. If you are still permitted to have visitation or even custody of the child, your husband may have to find somewhere else to stay at least until the restraining order goes to court and some limitations or conditions can be placed upon him. I suspect that in the end it will likely be that he is not to affect any physical discipline of your child, and depending on the totality of the circumstances, he may not be permitted to be alone with your child.

    You should also consider consulting a family law attorney to help give you some guidance in this matter as you have DCF already involved and the possibility of the police getting involved as well.

    After reading your other post, I have to ask: Why did you title this one, "Lies"? You make no mention of any lies. And now that I know your daughter is only 4 years old, I am doubly baffled as to why a BELT was used on her?!?! Was he drunk? Does he have a temper? Is he simply stupid? I'd have been inclined to arrest him then and there had I arrived at that call!

    He needs to speak to a criminal defense attorney and you need to speak with a Family Law attorney ASAP as this is not likely to end well for one or both of you.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Somewhere near Canada
    Posts
    35,894

    Default Re: Lies

    Quote Quoting gabbs13
    View Post
    My question involves child abuse or neglect in the State of: Florida

    My husband is being accused of child abuse by my daughter's biological father.. He spanked her with a belt and it left bruises and DCF said they don't think it was done intentionally and there has never beens complaints before but it left bruises this time so he took it to far they was suppose to get someone in our house so she could come back but the dad got a restoring order on my husband and he has to go to court so they won't allow her in the home with him here. I feel like I have to choose my child or my husband unless someone can help us figure out what to do.

    I'm going to ask you a question.

    Why do you think that spanking a 4 YEAR OLD with a belt to the point where it left bruises, is somehow acceptable?

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    Behind a Desk
    Posts
    98,846

    Default Re: Lies

    Quote Quoting gabbs13
    View Post
    My husband is being accused of child abuse by my daughter's biological father.. He spanked her with a belt and it left bruises and DCF said they don't think it was done intentionally....
    There is a significant difference between a finding that a beating was not intended to leave bruises and that the beating was not excessive. From what you have told us, DCF did not find that the beating wasn't excessive -- nor would one expect such a finding given the facts you have shared. The former means primarily that it is unlikely that criminal charges will follow, but leaves you in the position of having to explain your husband's bad judgment to the custody court.
    Quote Quoting gabbs13
    ...and there has never beens complaints before but it left bruises this time so he took it to far....
    From the consensus of pretty much everybody who has ever studied the issue, beating a child with any sort of weapon is always "taking it too far" (and yes, a belt is a weapon). But that aside, if your ex- was okay with your approach to corporal punishment as long as your husband didn't "take it too far", the distinction this time would be that your husband crossed that line.
    Quote Quoting gabbs13
    ...they was suppose to get someone in our house so she could come back...
    By that, you mean that protective services wanted to conduct a home study? There's no reason that couldn't proceed, even if the custody court has temporarily suspended your access until it sorts out what happened and whether your husband should be permitted to be around the child.
    Quote Quoting gabbs13
    ...but the dad got a restoring order on my husband and he has to go to court so they won't allow her in the home with him here.
    Which means that you should retain a lawyer and appear in court on the date of the hearing, so as to lay out your case as to why your child will be safe in your home and why the court should be comfortable that your husband will not again "take it too far".
    Quote Quoting gabbs13
    I feel like I have to choose my child or my husband unless someone can help us figure out what to do.
    Sometimes that's the choice -- between being a custodial parent to a child, or becoming the non-custodial parent because you choose to stay with a spouse who poses a danger to the child. A local custody lawyer should be able to help you formulate your argument for the court, and get your evidence organized for the hearing.

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