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  1. #11
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    Massachusetts
    Posts
    24,521

    Default Re: Changing Child's First and Middle Name

    That's the daycare's policy, not the law.

  2. #12
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Somewhere near Canada
    Posts
    35,894

    Default Re: Changing Child's First and Middle Name

    Quote Quoting mmsv2010
    View Post
    Thank you cbg, I didn't know that cause at daycare they make her spell her legal name not the name we use. They said they couldn't do it because it wasn't her real name.

    Flyingron, thank you for the clarification. I was advised by legal help that I can not serve but anyone else can and that it could be mailed because it was listed as an option on the form. Does it cost to use a process server?

    Dogmatique, sorry I believe it was dismissed with prejudice not without. The court said they werenunable to locate him for the past 2 years at the address I know he was residing for that time. That is his mother's address. When I went there one time the chilsupport mail was opened on the table so I know he ignores them. His sister also saw this and told me on a separate occasion. I stressed to the court that he did live there and still nothing was done.
    I think you mean that it was dismissed WITHOUT prejudice.

  3. #13
    Join Date
    Nov 2014
    Location
    California
    Posts
    260

    Default Re: Changing Child's First and Middle Name

    How do you determine that your child is emotionally distressed? Because she won't poop? Children tend to do that when they are out of their normal routine, it is not always a result of a "bad" visit.

  4. #14
    Join Date
    Apr 2015
    Posts
    8

    Default Re: Changing a Child's First and Middle Name

    Wess1881,she would do this for weeks after a visit with him. She would also come home and tell me "Mommy the girl was crying." She was referring to his girlfriend. Every visit it was the same thing. I magine he was abusing her as he did to me. He was horrible to me beyond belief. I suspected abuse. I told him in a nice way that our daughter shouldn't see this young lady cry like this all the time. After I told him that he stopped seeing our daughter for months. This was July 2014. He didn't ask about her again until January 2015. During this time the constipation ceased. It came back for a couple of weeks after his visit in January. This happens under no other circumstances.

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    Her aunt also noticed the constipation as well when he would randomly show up to her house to see if our daughter was there. I am a single mother. The last thing I needed was a child with an impaction which did happen.

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    Dogmatique, thank you for clearing that up. Regardless he is ducking child support payments. In a year I will be an RN so I won't need his help,not that I have been getting any to begin with.

    - - - Updated - - -

    Cbg, thank you for the clarification on the usage of the name. Could I tell the daycare they have to use the usage name?

  5. #15
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Somewhere near Canada
    Posts
    35,894

    Default Re: Changing a Child's First and Middle Name

    With all of this suspicion of abuse, what did you do about it?

  6. #16
    Join Date
    Apr 2015
    Posts
    8

    Default Re: Changing a Child's First and Middle Name

    Dogmatique, I just lessen the visits. When he did come around and wanted to see her I put time limitations on them. Other than that I can't not say there is actual abuse going on in his home. I would be a considerded a laughing stock. He is a narcissist and good at making himself look good and others look crazy. I want to change the visitation order but I am fearful of retaliation, it has happened before. Unless he doesn't show up like he didn't for child support.

  7. #17
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Somewhere near Canada
    Posts
    35,894

    Default Re: Changing a Child's First and Middle Name

    Quote Quoting mmsv2010
    View Post
    Dogmatique, I just lessen the visits. When he did come around and wanted to see her I put time limitations on them. Other than that I can't not say there is actual abuse going on in his home. I would be a considerded a laughing stock. He is a narcissist and good at making himself look good and others look crazy. I want to change the visitation order but I am fearful of retaliation, it has happened before. Unless he doesn't show up like he didn't for child support.
    Then quit hinting that he's abusing her and he's dangerous.

    When was he diagnosed?

  8. #18
    Join Date
    Apr 2015
    Posts
    8

    Default Re: Changing a Child's First and Middle Name

    Dogmatique, I just don't want my child involved in that. That would be a CPS case. I will leave it alone I just know abusers never change. He was actually diagnosed bipolar as a child from what I know. His behavior is textbook narcissist. Not diagnosed Narcissist.

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    He abused me so I wouldn't put it past him.

  9. #19
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Somewhere near Canada
    Posts
    35,894

    Default Re: Changing a Child's First and Middle Name

    Then stop bandying around that allegation, too.

    The problem is that you're alleging a lot, but can't prove anything. You have no grounds to modify. What do you want the court to do? They're not going to penalize Dad without having a good reason for doing so and for good reason. Think about it - would you be happy that he got an emergency order because he accused you of being on meth?

    See where I'm coming from?

    (And are you in counseling for the abuse?)

    - - - Updated - - -

    Quote Quoting mmsv2010
    View Post
    Dogmatique, I just don't want my child involved in that. That would be a CPS case. I will leave it alone I just know abusers never change. He was actually diagnosed bipolar as a child from what I know. His behavior is textbook narcissist. Not diagnosed Narcissist.

    - - - Updated - - -

    He abused me so I wouldn't put it past him.

    Do you understand what you've just said here?

    You've just told me that you'd rather let her go with Dad - who you allege is guilty of neglect - than involve child services?

  10. #20
    Join Date
    Apr 2015
    Posts
    8

    Default Re: Changing a Child's First and Middle Name

    Dogmatique, I said I lessen the visits and eventually he stopped seeing her after I told him what my four year old told me about the woman crying all the time. You are right I have no concrete proof. I spoke witha Domestic counselor and lawyer and said until something physical happens there is nothing I can do. So I do what I LEGALLLY can do for now.

    Maybe I am saying this because the girlfriend purposely got a job at my job and now he has a reason to show up at my job(which he did). So yes I go to counseling (Domestic Violence)especially because of the above situation. I will take your advice on the modifications and leave it alone. Thank you.

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